Nurses aren't maids!

[AnaCatRN]

I'm sorry. I really, really need to vent. I work for a pediatric private duty nursing agency, and I'm an RN. This is what I wish I could say to my new patient's mom: Why the heck would you ask your child's new night nurse to do her laundry?! When the hell did they put laundry questions on the NCLEX? Oh, yeah, they DIDN'T because NURSES AREN'T MAIDS! I'm not your kid's nanny, I'm a healthcare PROFESSIONAL - just like a physician. You wouldn't ask your pediatrician to do your kid's laundry, so you better not ask the nurse to do it, either! It's not 1950, anymore, Sparky!

Of course, I didn't say that. To be nice, I folded the kid's clothes tonight, but then I sent off an email to the clinical director at the agency complaining profusely about this insulting request. I mean, seriously! Where do people get the brass testicles to ask a nurse to do a maid's job?

Why do people automatically assume when they get private duty nursing covered by the state or their insurance that whoever is paying for it also thinks it's cool to provide you with housekeeping services? Isn't that insurance fraud? THe state doesn't want to pay for someone to do your kid's laundry. You can't ask me to do that! Not only is it DEGRADING to ask a healthcare professional to do laundry, it must be abuse of services. I hope to God above that no one at my agency told this woman that nurses do chores, because I will go all the way to the top of national corporate management if someone did. This better be an unfortunate misunderstanding on my patient's mom's part as to what nurses do and DO NOT do.

Has anyone else had to deal with this? I had one other patient's mom ask me if that was something we do, and she totally apologized for asking when I politely told her no. This new patient's mom guided me to the laundry room to make sure I understood how the machines work because she is assuming it's totally in my job description to do laundry. She didn't even ask, she just started out with "when you do her laundry..." Excuse me?! I clean the kid and his or her medical equipment. Nothing else! I'm not a home health aide (whose job it would possibly be). It's just not *my* job to do household chores!

OK, vent over. I feel a little better. Thanks for letting me vent.

[Norma Ward Acevedo]

HH LVN here.

Reading these experiences seems very familiar with a patient I used to be assigned to. The mother of my patient immediately upon our first meeting did several things that were pretty obnoxious; She changed my schedule ( I was very excited when my employer notified me I get to pick my own hours) and the mom changed my schedule to work from 10:30 am to 9pm. She would always try taking my food from me when food is expensive these days even when you door dash. She had no shame begging for food. She would demand I stay overtime because her other kid that I'm not responsible for watching has to be at her sports events at a certain time. She wanted me to babysit her kids for "only an hour or two". She also talked all the live long day and sometimes would sit there and simply stare while I tried doing my job. A few times when my patient needed help she bumped me out of the way, literally! When she saw me documenting she would immediately ask me to help her with something that was completely random like hanging some painting on a wall or decorating the house and passing the time rambling. Personally for me if the patient I am responsible for is in front of me I do some minor chores out of a courtesy. I clean and pick up the area we occupy, sanitize the surfaces and objects used, re-stock and help take out the garbage and recycling. I knew she knew I was a new grad then and maybe it was not smart to share that and looking back now I see she was an opportunist and seeing what she can get away with. Over time I told her I cannot work that schedule and we compromised. I did not want to be there all day. I strongly hinted that I would not be sharing my food and she finally got the point. When I was documenting and she would ask for a favor that was not emergent, I would let her know when I was finished I would help her. I let her know that I could not watch any other kids other than the one I am assigned to. She would make comments like " I just don't want you to get bored and that is why I give you these things to do.” To which I would say " oh no I love boring. We don't want any action here because when there's action, there's action.” Even when we're "not working" and the patient is at rest and clean, comfortable and everything needed for the time being has been done, a nurse is still at work because we have to keep any eye out. The mother did not prioritize or take advantage of de-cluttering or cleaning her house or even cooking for the family. She would comment a a lot like " I have so much things to do" and then proceed to sit on the couch and gab all day. I didn't want to hear that and I'm pretty sure her child didn't want to hear that. I don't care what you do when I get to your house, just leave the nurse to do her job and you go do what you got to do. You could sleep for all I care.