How Rude!!!

Nurses Relations

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Do you ever wonder how people can be so stupid and rude??

Today I was visiting my mom and decided to run over the local hairdresser and get a quick trim. This guy was there whose daughter graduated from high school last year. I do not know them very well just small town stuff. Town of 400 and everyone knows everyone. Anyway his daughter is going to school to be a nurse so I asked him how she was doing. (He knows I am an RN because I had him mother as a patient, and he asked me if was still working at that certain hospital). He says, "I just don't think being a nurse is very impressive. Having MD behind you name says a lot more. I can not believe I have to put her through college just to be a nurse."

I was totally dumbfounded!!! OMG!! Yeah having president in your name is impressive too. It is not like he is anything spectacular either. Never went to college, took over his dad's farm.....not that there is anything wrong with that, but that comment!!!!!!

Specializes in Obstetrics, M/S, Psych.

Well said, katscan.

I never encouraged my kids in the direction of nursing. I want better for them than I have had for myself. Nursing has provided and OK living for me and has had its rewards, but given the chance to be 20 again and starting over, would I take the same course? No. I wonder how many nurses actually would encourage their children to take the same path as they did? Not very many in my circle of peers.

okay, here is my 2 cents...

Whoever said "Open mouth-Insert foot"-amen. I don't think he meant to be rude, even though he was. I would have been VERY offended-and would have let him know it! I am assuming that his daughter just started in shcool, and he doesn't know how difficult it is. Once she gets further along, and he sees how much studying, practicing, and stress she has-he will understand. Hey, not everyone can make it through the program! Also, maybe he has been blessed with good health and has not been in the hospital. I have found, people opinions change GREATLY when they see how busy nurses are and how they still find time to give optimum care.

WHAT DID YOU SAY TO HIM!!

I do not think the guy was rude at all. Let's face it folks, doctors command more respect immediately than nurses-especially with our multiple ways of getting our RN. He is being practical-physicians earn more too for the investment of the college years over a lifetime than nurses. Physicians go at least 8 years to college. Some nurses have only 2 years. My parents invested 5 years on my BSN and when I got out the garbage men in my community earned more than I did. I had to work crazy hours for very low pay. In no way do I regret my nursing degree, I am just being practical. You have to WANT to be a nurse, as the financial renumeration is very poor for most of us and it is almost impossible to raise a family on what we make-let alone be physically present for our children. The man is proud of his daughter,no doubt and wants the best quality of life for her. Physicians on the whole have a much better quality of life after work than nurses, I feel. He was just wishing that his daughter is not going to face what we all discuss on this board...

Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.

yep physicians have a better quality of life materially after work than i do...

but they DO NOT HAVE THE TIME with their kids that I do----YOUNG and while they NEED me....they just hire nannies or help to deal with the lil monsters....or let their WIVES do it if they are male......

Can't COUNT how many times I have heard doctor parents try hard to explain to Cindy or Joey why they cannot make their school play, church school confirmation, or any manner of HUGE life events due to their obligation to work and career. I feel sorry for them, not envious!!!!!

OH yes, doctors have it so much better than me......,

they have HUGE houses...HUGE mortgages.....HUGE egos (often)

these can be ensnaring....... when you have a HIGH standard of living you tend to have to make more to live better and keep up. I feel NO such pressure....

They often start their careers with HUGE debts to medical schools, in the 6 figure range, easily, unless they were military as students/residents/interns.

I started *my* career debt-free and late in life. NO regret here!

I work when I want to......around my family's life, cause they are what matter, not a career, money and the "big house on the fairway"........

All in all, I say nursing has been good to me.....enabled me to make enough money for us to be comfortable, homeschool my kids and be a MOM first. NEVER could do that as a doctor. All our lady docs are at the hospital much more than they want to be.....but their choices are limited by their obligations.....

So no, I don't understand physician- envy in any nurse......we all can do what we WANT TO IN THIS COUNTRY if we work hard enough....but..........and having material goods will only go "so far" if you don't have anything else to come home to at the end of your 18hour day.....

as always, JMO.

I certianly did not mean to "whine" about it on the board. I was more dumbfounded than insulted. It really is not bothering me that much. Like I said I just can not believe he said that. Sorry but it is rude. I do not care what context it is in. I would never in a million years say something like "Oh my son wants to be a farmer, what a waste" to someone that is a farmer. It is just common sense and respect for those around you no matter what they do.

Physician envy?? Was your comment directed at me? Let me repeat that I do not regret my decision to be a nurse in ANY way, and do not "envy " physicians. You are putting words in my mouth if this comment was made to me. Personally I would hate to be one. Please read my post carefully. I was stating what I thought the man probably thought when he made the remark in relation to his daughter. By the way, I was always home for my kids-I was their school nurse,have been one for 21 years and yes, we just bought a big house "on the fairway" even though there are trees between. Is there something wrong with wanting that? I am 52 years old and have worked all my life and agree that family is first. It is just nice to be able to enjoy some of the things I have worked for. Oh yeah, I have been married 30 years to a veterinarian. We were very poor when we were married and he was a student while I worked. Yes I have the good things in life and have worked for them. Do you know too many people married 30 years? I don't need to envy physicians in the slightest.

Why is it that if your smart, "you should be an MD". My husband is a PA, and he gets that comment all the time. I guess some people define themselves as to the rank that they have, it is a shame. Everyone has special qualities, some RN's could not be MD's(hours away from family,etc), most MD's could not be nurses. Everyone has a style, it's too bad that his daughter has to feel that her passion is "less than sufficient", b/c her father wants her to compensate for his lack of confidence.

Okay, it is clear that this guy made himself look like an IDIOT! I wonder if he thought about how you may have took it on his drive home. You know, something I'm sure WE would do if we thought we offended some one (after we apologized, of course;) )

But, WHAT DID YOU SAY TO HIM??? Inquiring minds want to know.

Or were you just to shocked to say anything?

I did not really say anything. I seriously did not know what to say. I think I mumbled something like "Nursing is really had work."

In thinking back, I should have just made a joke or something. Like "Just a nurse, Hey!!!"

I think I may have bluerted out " EXCUSE ME??" in a manner that usually gets people's attention. (I seem to be doing that a LOT lately). That way he would have to explain his reasoning. Hey, sometimes it leads to a very enlightening conversation for "ignorant" person. And helps you feel better, too!

Specializes in Everything except surgery.
Originally posted by TeenyBabyRN

I believe the public perception of nurses began its sharp downfall shortly after former first lady Clinton made the comment that "Nurses are underworked and overpaid." This was at the same time Slick Willy was trying to push his health care reformplan through. What a joke - if you think back...healthcare as a whole began a sharp downfall during that time.

Please tell me when and where this was said by Hillary.

Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.

katscan my comment was *not* directed at you. SO don't your dander all up needlessly.......but....lets face it, the problem exists....

i see it out there in the "world".......and yes, I hear many coworkers whine about the big, fancy houses dr's have, their cars, material things, etc........and ya know what? It changes nothing. Any one of these nurses I am thinking of, has MORE than the "brains" and "ability" to become an M.D. yet chose not to. So instead of being happy with their choice, or actively doing something to change it, they complain. It's a cop-out and the easy way ---we nurses often want sympathy. But we don't get it from anyone.......so we complain some more....

And then we get upset when we overhear stupid comments about being "smart enough" to be an M.D. , rather than a lowly nurse. Should it upset us so? Not if we are happy w/what we are doing. Yes, we *all* could be paid more and are certainly worth more.....but guess what ---doctors often believe that, too, likening their "pittance" incomes to **nothing** compared to pro sports players or entertainers.

We ALL deserve to be paid more, considering our responsiblitities. But to get upset or take offense at ignorant, though well-meaning comments like the one above, does not help, either. I daresay in many, it awakens some feelings of envy or jealousy, so many of us react. I would not react like that myself.....just let the comment slide for the ignorant words they are and consider the source.

Getting defensive and taking it personally will certainly NOT help anyone, including the nursing profession. Yet this is exactly what we do......

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