Night Shift Causing Relationship Problems

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This is really just a vent session, because I know almost everyone here will know exactly what I mean when I say that I'm more than just a little tired.

This morning I got home around 0800 from my 3rd 12.5-13 hour shift in a row. Then I woke up at 2 in an attempt to go out and be an interesting person. My boyfriend wants us to clean the house, go to 3 different places to get errands done, then go shopping for fun. Lately he's been getting upset that I'm indecisive about what I even feel like doing. Honestly, I don't feel like doing anything other than reading or watching Netflix or sleeping. He has never worked night shift before. Today I said "babe, I literally got home from work this morning--I worked this entire morning. What would you do if you had just worked this entire morning?"

To which he replied "well that wouldn't bother me at all!"

*eye roll*

Oh well. I'll just pout in my booth while I munch on the peanuts at the restaurant I didn't realize we were even going to (because I fell asleep in the car and woke up here). Ha.

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Specializes in CMSRN, hospice.

Awww. That would make me so angry! It is very patient of you to go along with these antics after doing three in a row.

I think you should wake him up at 2 AM and be like, "BAE. Let's go to the nearest 24 hour Denny's RIGHT MEOW, and then binge on the dumbest show we can find on Netflix, and watch the sun rise over some mimosas." Because that is what it feels like!

It sucks that he doesn't get it. I will never understand what humans don't understand about how staying up all night wrecks your body. It's why we get paid the big bucks.

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Specializes in Gerontology.
Awww. That would make me so angry! It is very patient of you to go along with these antics after doing three in a row.

I think you should wake him up at 2 AM and be like, "BAE. Let's go to the nearest 24 hour Denny's RIGHT MEOW, and then binge on the dumbest show we can find on Netflix, and watch the sun rise over some mimosas." Because that is what it feels like!

It sucks that he doesn't get it. I will never understand what humans don't understand about how staying up all night wrecks your body. It's why we get paid the big bucks.

Do this! Esp the RIGHT MEOW!

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Awww. That would make me so angry! It is very patient of you to go along with these antics after doing three in a row.

I think you should wake him up at 2 AM and be like, "BAE. Let's go to the nearest 24 hour Denny's RIGHT MEOW, and then binge on the dumbest show we can find on Netflix, and watch the sun rise over some mimosas." Because that is what it feels like!

It sucks that he doesn't get it. I will never understand what humans don't understand about how staying up all night wrecks your body. It's why we get paid the big bucks.

I'll only add to make sure it's a night after he worked and will work again in the morning.

Ughh... If one doesnt work nights, one doesn't really "get it." My normally considerate husband would ask me to run errands during the day after a shift and really took it hard when I told him no.

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Specializes in Trauma, Teaching.

I had folks ringing the doorbell at 1 or 2 in the afternoon, and being honestly confused saying "I though you'd be up by now". I simply said it was the same at 2 AM to me, and they got it.

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I work nights and unless you've been there, no one understands. When I first started, my husband was like "why didn't you get this done? You've been home all day." I quickly taught him a lesson. :p

I agree with the previous posters. One night when you're off, wake him at 2am and insist on going to Denny's then maybe a 24 hour Walmart and other stuff. He should learn fast.

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Specializes in Med Surg/PCU.
One night when you're off, wake him at 2am and insist on going to Denny's then maybe a 24 hour Walmart and other stuff. He should learn fast.

One of my preteen daughters used to come home from school yelling at the top of her lungs at her brother, knowing full well I was sleeping, all while complaining all I ever did was sleep all day. So I actually did just that. I made sure she didn't have any tests at school the next day, and then woke her up at 2:00 and made her fold laundry and sweep the floor. I let her go back to bed 30 minutes later. The yelling in the afternoon stopped immediately!

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I am literally doing this tonight. I'm going to wake him up at 2-3 and insist on going to IHOP.

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Ooooookkkkkkaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy and he just told me "you don't even really do that much on night shift."

Houston, we have a problem.

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Specializes in CMSRN, hospice.
Ooooookkkkkkaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy and he just told me "you don't even really do that much on night shift."

Houston, we have a problem.

What. the what.

OMG, that makes me so stabby. It is about what we KNOW that could save someone's LIFE at 0400 while the rest of the world sleeps. And anyone who thinks our patients are all asleep at night just has no idea.

Can we, like, suspend HIPAA briefly and have a Take Your Boo Thang to Work Night? I think that would change some perspectives wicked quick.

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Specializes in SICU, trauma, neuro.
I am literally doing this tonight. I'm going to wake him up at 2-3 and insist on going to IHOP.

Mmmmmm, lingonberry crepes!! Please update us. Enquiring minds want to know. :p

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What. the what.

OMG, that makes me so stabby. It is about what we KNOW that could save someone's LIFE at 0400 while the rest of the world sleeps. And anyone who thinks our patients are all asleep at night just has no idea.

Can we, like, suspend HIPAA briefly and have a Take Your Boo Thang to Work Night? I think that would change some perspectives wicked quick.

I completely agree! I wish I could take him into work. I was so livid when he said that. I was going to make him sleep on the couch, but he apologized and then went out and got my favorite pizza. So I'll just keep my revenge to the IHOP plan.

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