So my mother has been in the hospital since Saturday night. They have done a few ekg's, an echo, an ultrasound, ct scan, stress test, etc. and found she had fluid surrounding her left lung. They did a procedure to remove it yesterday and sent it down to the lab. Let me tell you, my mother is a nurse's nightmare! She is constantly crabby, short, and just overall rude to pretty much all the staff there (i'll get back to her in a second.)
The pt. Next to her was an old lady, not fully aware of what was going on, but aware enough to know basic stuff (like if she was hungry, or cold, or needed to go to the bathroom, etc.) Anyway this little old lady had a male RN providing for her, and I really couldn't believe how inconsiderate he was. When she needed a diaper change, which seemed to be like every hour, he would come and do it. The problem is, is that she stated VERY clearly that she wasn't comfortable with him doing it. But he did it anyway. Also, when moving her, he seemed very rough with her (she weighed no more than 100lbs, and he was pulling 250 easilly.) Her privacy was never respected, and walking by I ended up seeing her nude more times than I can count. I even walked in to the room while she was getting a diaper change, and the nurse didnt even bother closing the curtains. I ended up closing them, but he just opened them as soon as I did.
Now the problem I have with my mom is that after seeing this she has automatically generalized all male nurses to be like this man. And is not quiet about it. I just about died yesterday, when her nurse came in and said her shift was ending and that "chris" will be taking over. This was her response. "a man? I hate male nurses. He is NOT touching me." I was so embarassed, and I could see the shocked look on the RN's face. I'm really not surprised though. My mother is a very blunt woman, and she's sick so I understand her frustration about being there in general.
I guess what I'm wondering is have you experienced a patient like my mother? How did you handle it? How would you handle an extreme personality like hers? I told her that she would be my nightmare patient, and she just laughed it off, but I'm so serious.
Also, what would you do if you saw the treatment the other patient was getting? I feel really bad that I didn't speak up (that isnt like me at all.) I know it's probably frustrating, as a man, to be told that someone isn't comfortable with you doing certain things. But shouldn't you just brush it off? These aren't animals, they are people, and we need to respect their wishes, regardless of how it makes you feel.
Sorry, just needed to rant. It has been a looooong weekend.
Specializes in Hospice, ONC, Tele, Med Surg, Endo/Output.
Was the male nurse without a CNA? Figures. He probably is sick and tired of changing her diaper all day when he has other stuff to do. Where the heck is his CNA?
Specializes in Hospice, ONC, Tele, Med Surg, Endo/Output.
To the OP: Thanks so much for not reporting another nurse to management for having flaws. Good job. I mean that. It's amazing how many people cannot live with discomfort, and choose to mess around with a nurse's employment just to be heard. I know it hurt and annoyed you to see a patient treated that way, but thanks for just venting on here, instead of reporting it to management. At least the diaper was changed. One reason why i won't take a management job is because i do not want to micro-manage and harrass nurses for every single afront. Unless a patient is being truly abused, neglected, or physically harmed, why must so many individuals report a nurse for "being abrubt, not having a personality". Did it ever dawn on anyone that the nurse is having a bad day, may be understaffed(the unit), or be absolutely sick and freaking tired of not being able to get a single thing done from start to finish. Just being ill does not grant the patient a "perfect", angelic nurse. Talk about entitlement.
Specializes in Clinical Research, Outpt Women's Health.
Was the male nurse without a CNA? Figures. He probably is sick and tired of changing her diaper all day when he has other stuff to do. Where the heck is his CNA?
Probably so, but that doesn't excuse leaving an exposed patient for others to see. I have a lot of sympathy for hospital nurses in general, but there is a line you shouldn't cross and that is one of them.
Specializes in Hospice, ONC, Tele, Med Surg, Endo/Output.
Probably so, but that doesn't excuse leaving an exposed patient for others to see. I have a lot of sympathy for hospital nurses in general, but there is a line you shouldn't cross and that is one of them.
You do have a good point. However, do you think this nurse deliberately opened the curtain each time the op closed it? Hmmmmm? Sounds a bit strange to me.
You do have a good point. However, do you think this nurse deliberately opened the curtain each time the op closed it? Hmmmmm? Sounds a bit strange to me.
I think I just offended him when I closed the curtain. Like I was intruding on the way he was giving care. Even though I was doing the right thing.
You do have a good point. However, do you think this nurse deliberately opened the curtain each time the op closed it? Hmmmmm? Sounds a bit strange to me.
Deliberate or not, leaving a patient exposed multiple times is inexcusable. The nurse in question needs a reminder of that, as he might not even know he is doing it.
You do have a good point. However, do you think this nurse deliberately opened the curtain each time the op closed it? Hmmmmm? Sounds a bit strange to me.
Also, tobe clear, i didnt say he opened it every time i closed the curtains. I said i closed it once and he opened them. While he was changing her diaper. I mean come on, this guy needed to have it closed.
I hope you say something. The 5 male nurses I have worked with were sloppy and messy. Just my opinion. I have only seen five of them. I have judged them as not being nursing material because they don't care. Because there are so few of them, they are more likely to be judged. The comments made about the male nurse you encountered is common. I apologize.
I hope you say something. The 5 male nurses I have worked with were sloppy and messy. Just my opinion. I have only seen five of them. I have judged them as not being nursing material because they don't care. Because there are so few of them they are more likely to be judged. The comments made about the male nurse you encountered is common. I apologize.[/quote']
No i cannot be sure of that. But regardless of whether she was fully coherent or not, she clearly said she did not want him to change her. He made no attempt to see if she would be ok with someone else. That is what bugged me most about it.
Maybe he knows her well in that she will refuse anyone who walks in. Maybe the other nurses had their fill of this patient and decided that it was his turn to take her. You're making assumptions about this nurse accompanied by a lack of evidence.
The curtain issue is another matter entirely. However, what time of the day did that occur? Was the patient by the door or window? Did he leave the curtain undrawn every time he was with her? Sometimes people do not want to touch those curtains or have them brushing against them, and I don't blame them. They can be stool-ridden from never being washed and people drawing them with gloves on that they just used to change someone. They are disgusting to run into or have them rub against your hair and back.
Maybe he knows her well in that she will refuse anyone who walks in. Maybe the other nurses had their fill of this patient and decided that it was his turn to take her. You're making assumptions about this nurse accompanied by a lack of evidence.
The curtain issue is another matter entirely. However, what time of the day did that occur? Was the patient by the door or window? Did he leave the curtain undrawn every time he was with her? Sometimes people do not want to touch those curtains or have them brushing against them, and I don't blame them. They can be stool-ridden from never being washed and people drawing them with gloves on that they just used to change someone. They are disgusting to run into or have them rub against your hair and back.
Well she was admitted after my mother, so i doubt he knew her too well. She gets her care at home, but needed to be admitted. I know this because her regular nurse came by to check on her. Regardless, I really hope when I'm old that I have a nurse that listens to me. Even if I'm somewhat out of it... She wasnt completely demented.
As far as the curtains go, she was by the door. But I'm failing to see any sort of justification here. I don't believe they teach you to only care about pt privacy in regards to "what time of day it is," or "whether they are by the window or door." I'm sorry, but if he was so afraid to touch those curtains he should have put gloves on, or have the curtains changed. She wasnt a chimp throwing her feces. She was wearing a diaper. My issue isn't with it being a male providing care (i am male.) My issue is that he provided care after she said numerous times she didn't want him to. And he made no effort to see if she wanted to have another nurse do it. Although, she did not have any issues with female nurses. Which leads me to believe she did not want a male seeing her nude. Which is her right.
You're trying to defend someone that A: disregarded patient privacy, and B: was providing sub par care at best. If I treated a pt like this at the LTC I worked at I would have been fired on the spot. Even if I knew the pt well. There is no reason, demented or not, to expose a pt to the whole world. NONE.
blackvans1234
375 Posts
Do they have a patient representative?
If so, give them a call, file a complaint about a specific nurse.
They'll straighten up real quick. Especially with patient surveys affecting the $$$