Need Some Help with a stressful situation

[casi, ASN, RN]

So I need a little help with a decision....

I've been at my TCU job a year now. I used to love it. I loved going to work, I loved the patient population I worked with and I loved the people I worked with.

Over the past couple of months things have changed. A new supervisor was hired that I butt heads with. I'm very head strong and independent, she's the same. I'll get a new admit or have something come up during the night and make a nursing order for a treatment and she'll outright disagree with me and change the treatment without even assessing the patient. A few times I've said something about a treatment and she'll tell me I'm wrong when I can actually provide clinical resources that she's the wrong one. When I give her report and state a patient refused a treatment she'll yell at me telling me the patient can't refused. At one point I told her "the patient has been a RN longer than I've been alive. She knows the risks of refusing."

A while back I was told I was going to be trained in as an on-call supervisor which never happened. She told me, "I don't think you'd be very good at this job." My list could go on and on for the things like this that have occurred. I've smiled and bared it. I've gone to her and respectively talked to her about the clashing and have tried to come to a common ground.... nothing has helped.

She has been going to my DON telling them everything she thinks I am doing wrong. I've had other nurses tell me I'm great and they love working after me, or thank me for helping them. I've had the supervisor who works opposite of this woman tell me she's happy when I'm working because I'm a good nurse.

So I got a call from my DON the other day with a formal verbal warning about all the things I've been doing wrong, such as not getting all my work done and passing stuff off to the next shift. These are problems everyone has been experiencing. Most of the time I spend a large portion of my shift cleaning up from the previous shift.

Here's where my dilemma comes in. Over the past couple of months the stress from this job has been making me sicker and sicker. I have chronic headaches that have been grossly exacerbated, which now have turned into almost constant severe headaches. My depression has gotten out of control despite the Prozac that normally keeps it under control. Some days I find myself borderline suicidal. I am miserable and can barely function outside of work. I've been applying to jobs left and right, but the job market is really tight right now and I haven't had a lot of luck.

My boyfriend keeps telling me that I can quit and we'll make do on his $9.50/hr salary and by using credit cards. I haven't taken him up on this because it is ridiculous to put ourselves into that much debt. I'm currently in an RN-BSN program, and I got my extra loans in the mail yesterday... I took out a heck of a lot more loans than I thought I did and got nearly 2 months worth of pay. My plan was to throw this money back at my student loans... but then I got to thinking. I could use this money to quit my job. I would risk not finding another job within two months, but I would be a lot healthier. Is this a smart move? What else can I do to try and improve my situation?

[79Tango]

Dont jump off a ship without having one pulled up next to you!

[tokmom, BSN, RN]

I would start looking for a job now. Nothing is worth your health.

[Nurse SMS, MSN, RN]

Can you request a shift switch or switching to a different floor? I agree this situation sounds unwinnable for you. I don't, however, think quitting is even remotely a good idea without something else lined up.

[JBudd, MSN]

Go to HR, report what is happening, that your workplace has become increasingly hostile since this person came on board. Get some letters from the other supervisor and coworkers describing how well you are doing. Ask for help, state that you have always loved your job, and the only change has been from this person, give dates and details of the changes she has made to your assessments.

Start keeping a log if you haven't already, of things that you are finishing for the previous shift, changes that she makes after you, and what you may need to pass on to the next and why.

HR really hates the phrase "hostile work place". Don't go in with a "poor pitifull me" attitude, go in with confidence and state that you are concerned about the unit, as well as your own health. Report that she is putting the facility at risk if she is forcing treatments on patients without their consent.

Start looking at other units within the facility you may transfer to, get your resume up to date, start looking at other jobs. HR may or may not be helpful, but you will have stood up for yourself.:redbeathe

P.S. I wouldn't use student loans for anything other than education, it'll come back and bite you in the backside.

[casi, ASN, RN]

I have been on the job hunt. I actually just had a phone interview :)

I have been considering transferring to another nursing home closer to home within the company if things keep up.

[canoehead, BSN, RN]

If you were to quit, could you go per diem, and pick up shifts as YOU needed?

I would complain to HR as described, before she builds up enough warning paperwork on you. Put your communication with her in writing (email) so you have evidence of her statements to you that are incorrect. After you conversations send her "in follow up to our discussion..." emails if you need to record a verbal issue.

[RNDance]

Sometimes it's just time for a change. As others have said, have a new position lined up before you jump ship---with the economy what it is it's not a good idea to leave any job before you have another.

Whenever I've left a job in the past I've made a list with two columns. One column lists "reasons for staying" and the other column lists "reasons for leaving."

When the reasons for leaving number more than the reasons for staying or hold more weight, I put on my traveling shoes and start looking for a new job.

Good luck to you! :redbeathe

[CapeCodMermaid, RN]

Contact HR. Supervisor or not, she sounds like a bully.

[ProgressiveActivist, BSN, RN]

You are going to be railroaded by this ignorant woman. Line up another job, ASAP. The writing is on the wall. HR will not help you; they are there only to protect the facility and they WILL aid and abet this incompetent middle manager.

Get out now.

Oh yeah, I am in the same boat as you right now and I know how much it sucks. Life is not fair, in fact it hardly ever is.

[casi, ASN, RN]

Thank you to everyone.

[prettynurse125]

I have went thru something exactly similar its really sad some places dont work as a team and adon/don's wrk against there good nurses my advice to is get away from it all its not worth going thru i have been depressed sad etc because of a situtation like that its stress free once u get away from it. u will find another job nurses can get a job quick or find a job while ur still there and give ur 2weeks i just quit and have found new jobs and im stress free and happy and im doing my rn online and have loans and alot of bills its stressful but pray but ull get thru it just get out of there