Need help with a decision!!

[6_figure_income]

I am an RN with 1.5 years of Medical Telemetry experience in a hospital and 2 months of additional experience in an Internal Medicine clinic. Currently, I am unemployed but have several job offers to consider. I need to make a decision but not sure which one(s) to work for. My offers are as follow:

1. Telemetry unit at a small, 100-bed hospital, 5 minute commute from my home, 6a-6p shift

2. Telemetry unit at a larger, nicer, 300+ bed hospital, 30-mile commute, 7a-7:30p shift

3. Per diem position at Los Angeles County juvenile correctional facilities and camps via a registry, 8-hr shifts, possibly in a psych unit

4. Los Angeles County clinic, 15-mile commute, 8-hr shifts

5. Urgent care center with an independent medical group, 15-mile commute, 8-hr shifts

Here are my likes and dislikes of being an RN:

Likes:

- Working the least amount of days per week as possible, so I can have more off days

- Short commutes

- Low stress and low workload

- Doing as little as possible in terms of work, tasks, procedures, talking to patients, family members, patient teaching, etc.

- Caring for low acuity patients (the walky-talkies)

- The pay of the RN profession

- The self-scheduling at the hospital (I get to pick which days I want to work)

- Get the patient in, do what you need to do, and get the patient out (fast patient turnover)

- A 12-hr, 3-day workweek, as opposed to 8-hrs 5 days a week (this means I'm working 3 days, not 5 days.)

Dislikes:

- Exposure to infectious disease patients, such as MRSA, VRE, TB, etc.

- Caring for confused, psych, terminally ill, or very high acuity patients (I work in tele, not ICU or LTC)

- Getting up super early in the morning, like 5 am

- Codes and patient deaths

- Giving and receiving report at beginning, during, and end of a hospital shift

- Starting IV's

- Per diem positions (I want a set schedule so I will be forced to go in to work. If I had to pick and choose, I'd choose not to work at all.)

- Customer service (this is a hospital, not a hotel)

- Meetings, performance improvement activities, and the boss' "numbers" (I don't care about your numbers, at all. My job is to care for my patients, not sell the facility or come up with new ways of doing things. That's management's job. You want my suggestion boss? My suggestion is to get rid of customer service altogether. This is a hospital, not a hotel or restaurant. That way, the nurses will have more time for patient care and documentation. Of course, if I actually say what's on my mind every time I'm at work, I'd get fired.)

- Socializing while at work (I'm here to work and get paid, not make friends or talk about your children or personal life or problems)

- Birthday parties or any kind of party (see point above)

- Questions about my personal life, including whether I'm married, have a girlfriend, have kids, who I live with, who makes my lunch, etc. My personal life is no one's business.

So, which of the above 5 offers should I take? No negative comments or comments about how I should not be in nursing please. I'm not here to be judged. Just looking for an answer of which of the above 5 offers you think I should take. List in order from first choice to last choice which offer you think I should take.

[decnewgrad]

I think you must be kidding. If not, I think you'll find yourself quite miserable in any inpatient nursing job given your likes and dislikes. So... good luck with that.

[TheCommuter, BSN, RN]

I'd pick options #1 or #2 because of your preference for 12-hour shifts and desire to have more days off per week. I'd eliminate option #3 because it is a per diem position and you have indicated that you do not like the instability of per diem work.

I'd also eliminate options #4 and #5 because these jobs involve 8-hour shifts, and you have implied that you do not particularly enjoy 8-hour days because you would have to show up to work more days per week.

[NickiLaughs, ADN, BSN, RN]

I would find it easier to work 3 12's even if I don't like my job versus 5 8's of not liking my job (even if I disliked it a little less).

Oddly enough my favorite nursing job ever was as an LVN working 5 8's.

Congrats on all your job offers considering the economy

[dijaqrn]

if you're not kidding you need a new career! Good luck.

[cute-1]

option 2...if this is real...

[6_figure_income]

I am an RN and am looking to work anywhere that has the following:

1. loose adherence to policies and procedures (nobody ever follows those 100% anyway, so why bother having them?)

2. low stress, low workload, kickback doing as little as possible (i am not setting myself up for quick burnout)

3. good pay and benefits

4. 12/3, 10/4, or 8/5 mid-shift work schedules preferred over 8/5 day shifts (i am not a morning person and will not get up at 5 am everyday)

5. prefer outpatient (clinic) over inpatient (hospital)

6. least amount of exposure to infectious disease, such as MRSA, VRE, C.diff, TB, etc. (i have a family and am not about to bring this stuff home)

7. freedom to do what i want when i want (nobody looking over my shoulder all the time watching my work, listening in on my phone calls, or watching me on the monitors)

8. least amount of dealings with patients' family members

9. least amount of patient teaching or talking to patients or family members

10. small enough unit where your co-workers aren't constantly bugging you

11. least amount of codes or patient deaths

I am looking for the right facility for me to work as an RN, not a lecture or suggestions that I should not be an RN or that I'm in the wrong profession. Now tell me, where should I work?

[HeartsOpenWide, RN]

Pull your covers over your head, roll over and keep dreaming; or get checked for Schizophrenia because you are delusional.

[50caliber]

Better off staying at home.

[TheCommuter, BSN, RN]

Threads have been merged due to the virtually identical question that is being asked by the exact same original poster.

[caliotter3]

Don't expect much do you?

[Coffee Nurse, BSN, RN]

How can you come onto a forum of nurses, state that you want a job that encompasses all of the benefits of our profession with none of the troubles that are vented about in so many threads (and make yourself sound like an unpleasant person to work with, as well), and expect to be offered helpful advice?

Unless, of course, this is just a troll, which is what I'm inclined to believe.