The narcissist is described as being excessively preoccupied with issues of personal adequacy, power, and prestige.[2] Narcissistic personality disorder is closely linked to self-centeredness.
From wikipedia.
Is it just me, or are you surrounded with people like this (and I'm not talking about those of you that work in psych specifically?)
Seems like everybody I come across these days at work and in other arenas displays many if not all of these characteristics, and it is by no means just the doctors. How about those nurses that still wear the cap/white dress to work? I have to think they do that in part because they have some sort of unfulfilled psychological need. It's certainly not practical anymore.
Can I just throw out there a big huge "GET OVER YOURSELF!" ?!?!?
I love how the DSM-IV takes annoying personalities and turns them into a disorder, thereby taking the onus of change off the "victim." I once looked up histrionic personality disorder (yes, it's a "disorder"), and thought, "When did being a drama queen become a disorder?!"
Funny, because my sister has been diagnosed with both 'narcissistic personality disorder' and 'histrionic personality disorder'. Let me tell you, she's an absolute JOY to be around. For me, the jury is out on whether personality disorders are truely legit, but my sister certainly takes being a selfish drama queen up to a pathological level. It seems to be a family thing--my mother does the same thing.
She was diagnosed when she was commited for threatening suicide to her OB doc and WIC nurse (by taking 4 ibuprofen). She willingly signed herself in to the psych facility and then promptly tried to leave when she discovered there was no tv in her room. She had the psych doc convinced that she was just 'talking big' until the rest of the family joined in the meeting and gave our side--19 years of history with her.
That's not true, but I did have a laugh off it because can seem that way, I guess.
Remember, we ALL have "quirks" that can be labeled as any particular personality disorder. However, as long as we are able to function in our society, these "quirks" remain nothing more than "quirks".
Once, these "quirks" begin to impede on our ability to have positive interpersonal interactions, coping skills and whatnot, then we have a problem.
A person is not a full-blown narcissist until we begin to see how their behavior has a pattern of disruption (with their relationships with others) and poor functioning.
In theory, these people failed to "get what they needed" at that stage in our lives wherein we still believe it's "all about us" and require others to supply our needs.
And that's key: the narcissist is looking for a "supply" or for people to "feed" them. They lack empathy because they are looking only at what others can give to them. They never learned to manage and foster their own self-worth and so rely on others.
Everyone has moments of selfishness or attention-seeking, but the narcissist is a nasty piece of work. They literally use people up and suck them dry. They manage this by using their charisma and mimicking behaviors that they have seen as eliciting a positive response in others. They don't really feel what they are putting out. It's just a means to get the supply they need.
Once others are sucked dry, they really get nasty. It is often not until the ugliness blows full-force that others begin to realize, "He's a narcissist... I see it now. It makes sense!"
I mention all this because, while someone happens to enjoy wearing whites and a cap for the "supply" it brings from others, it does not automatically make them a narcissist. I would guess the majority of nurses, who do this, are just set in their ways or maybe have some sort of psychological reason (though not necessarily negative) for doing so.
You would have to look at much much more than that to call someone a narcissist.
Sorry for rambling. I just think this stuff is interesting :)
I do too. This perfectly describes my sister. Motherhood hasn't improved her much--but her son has given her another tool to milk sympathy and attention.
Funny how all the DSM "diagnosis" eventually comes down to somebodies opinion, said one counselor. I fear becoming paranoid. Guess I'm just plain nucking futs.
when my dtr was 15, she was what you'd consider an 'out-of-control-teen'.
a lot of acting out.
we sent her to a psych hospital (knowing there was some sort of disorder).
the admitting doc dx'd her w/bipolar. (WRONGO)
she came home and was 'stable' for a couple of months then started doing some unacceptable crap.
back to another hospital (not the first one, as all the teens were pocketing their meds, later spitting them out when nurse walked away, THEN would pool them altogether and divide them randomly!!)
2nd hospital, admitting doc didn't even eval her.
he just went with the previous dx of bipolar.
trying to shorten this, she had a total of 5-6 hospitalizations that year, with every.single.doctor. running with the original diagnosis.
NO ONE had personally eval'd her.
she is now almost 21, doing wonderfully...thank you God.
i ended up taking her off all her meds, except her antidepressant.
she had become toxic from lithium, and the other psych meds were completely inappropriate.
i know she does have some sort of personality disorder but i KNOW it is not bipolar.
i try not to stereotype all psych hospitals but i do have a bad taste in my mouth, to this day.
re my experience with my dtr's hospitalizations, randomly slapping a dx on her, and being permanently labeled as something she is not...
if it weren't for me, she wouldn't have had any type of advocate.
even my husband, her pediatrician, teachers...they all blasted me for taking her off her meds, insisting that "bipolar" kids need their medicine.
That sounds incredibly frustrating. Bipolar disorder was considered by my sister's doc (and my family insisted she was) but it was eventually decided that she didn't fit the categories very well--thus the two personality disorder diagnoses.
do you really wear a nursing hat? i can understand wearing white, since my mom is of that generation of nurse... but wearing the hat "almost" makes me think you might still stand up when a doctor enters a room, or give him/her your seat, or get them a cup of coffee.
while i'm nowhere as old as florence nightingale or clara barton, i have given my chair to a doctor if no empty chair were available and, on occasion, have asked a doctor (and other personnel) who seemed tired and frazzled, if they would like some coffee or tea. i, in no way, think those actions are demeaning.
instead, i see it more as a simple act of human kindness. i have even had several doctors bring me tea
when they got themselves coffee, so it all evens out. when i worked at the state psych hospital, there was one psychiatrist who was in his mid-nineties, and still had a fulltime practice. he was as sharp as a
tack but physically very fragile. we all offered him an arm when he needed it, got him his charts, helped him with his coat sometimes, did what we could without denting or squashing his dignity.
as a routine though, give up my chair to a same age or younger m.d. who s reasonably rested? hell! no!
coffee and tea? unless you are pooped, frail, injured, or old.... old.... old.... "get yer own coffee!"
Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.
when my dtr was 15, she was what you'd consider an 'out-of-control-teen'.
a lot of acting out.
we sent her to a psych hospital (knowing there was some sort of disorder).
the admitting doc dx'd her w/bipolar. (WRONGO)
she came home and was 'stable' for a couple of months then started doing some unacceptable crap.
back to another hospital (not the first one, as all the teens were pocketing their meds, later spitting them out when nurse walked away, THEN would pool them altogether and divide them randomly!!)
2nd hospital, admitting doc didn't even eval her.
he just went with the previous dx of bipolar.
trying to shorten this, she had a total of 5-6 hospitalizations that year, with every.single.doctor. running with the original diagnosis.
NO ONE had personally eval'd her.
she is now almost 21, doing wonderfully...thank you God.
i ended up taking her off all her meds, except her antidepressant.
she had become toxic from lithium, and the other psych meds were completely inappropriate.
i know she does have some sort of personality disorder but i KNOW it is not bipolar.
i try not to stereotype all psych hospitals but i do have a bad taste in my mouth, to this day.
re my experience with my dtr's hospitalizations, randomly slapping a dx on her, and being permanently labeled as something she is not...
if it weren't for me, she wouldn't have had any type of advocate.
even my husband, her pediatrician, teachers...they all blasted me for taking her off her meds, insisting that "bipolar" kids need their medicine.
ticks me off just thinking about it, to this day.
leslie
My niece went through a similar experience. She's 20 now, and trying to cope with the aftermath of it, as well as things that happened to her while in the "therapeutic setting"
When a new or existing psych drug needs to be marketed a new personality disorder is invented and put into the DSM IV.
Actually, at least one personality disorder has been eliminated from the DSM since I was in nursing school in the Dark Ages, and no new PDs have been added. While plenty of medications are used as adjuncts in the treatment of some personality disorders, there is (unfortunately!) no medication that treats any of the personality disorders, and not even any of the drug companies claim that there is. I've been saying for decades that whoever finally comes up with a pill that fixes BPD will end up rich as Croesus and probably also win the Nobel prize.
There are plenty of questionable diagnoses, psych and otherwise, that have been "invented" in recent years to create a need and market for a particular drug, but personality disorders are not among them.
do you really wear a nursing hat? I can understand wearing white, since my mom is of that generation of nurse... but wearing the hat "almost" makes me think you might still stand up when a doctor enters a room, or give him/her your seat, or get them a cup of coffee.
Once again -- it's a cap, not a "hat"!!!!!!!!!!!! (I'm sure that, if I keep saying that enough times, eventually everyone here will get it ... :))
I've worked in psych most of my career, so I've worn street clothes most of that time. However, on the rare occasions when I'm in "whites," yes, I wear real whites (not scrubs) and my cap (proudly). I started out in the day when everyone wore whites and their caps and no one thought it was any kind of hardship or insult. I've never gotten anything but positive responses. I don't stand up when physicians walk into the room, and I would only offer a physician a chair if I was getting up anyway (of course, I don't spend a great deal of time at work sitting down in the first place). However, if I'm not busy at the moment, I have often offered physicians (and others) who have come onto my unit a cup of coffee, the same as I would offer them something if they came into my home. I see that as basic hospitality -- they're on my turf, and guests in my "home." I've never had a physician ask me to get him/her a cup of coffee, and have rarely been treated with less than the professional courtesy and respect I expect, and extend to others.
Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.
. . .Once again -- it's a cap, not a "hat"!!!!!!!!!!!! (I'm sure that, if I keep saying that enough times, eventually everyone here will get it ... :))
I must have missed your posts about this before, but thank you!!! The "hat" thing drives me nuts, too. It may even edge out "HIPPA" in place of "HIPAA" as the most annoying thing on allnurses.
There has been a measured rise in narcissistic traits over the last few generations. A psychologist by the name of Jean Twenge has done research on this and published a book detailing the rise in narcissism. It's called "Generation Me."
So while there may or may not be more NPDs around, there is more narcissism around.
There has been a measured rise in narcissistic traits over the last few generations. A psychologist by the name of Jean Twenge has done research on this and published a book detailing the rise in narcissism. It's called "Generation Me."
So while there may or may not be more NPDs around, there is more narcissism around.
Wow...that is really interesting, thank you. I might just have to check that out. It sounds like it is right up my alley. Generational differences and these types of traits happen to be something I am EXTREMELY interested in (....my crazy OP probably didn't make much sense to anybody, BTW, but this is an interesting offshoot.)
I have to admit, the generational differences discussion tends to set my teeth on edge. While there are obviously many self-entitled, narcissistic, and unrealistic people out of my generation, I hate that they define my entire generation. It's probably because I don't like the idea of being lumped in, when I wasn't raised with the 'you're a 'speshul' snowflake' attitude and have worked hard to get where I am, supporting myself, and at times keeping my own family together (I'm the oldest of 6).
HyperSaurus, RN, BSN
765 Posts
Funny, because my sister has been diagnosed with both 'narcissistic personality disorder' and 'histrionic personality disorder'. Let me tell you, she's an absolute JOY to be around. For me, the jury is out on whether personality disorders are truely legit, but my sister certainly takes being a selfish drama queen up to a pathological level. It seems to be a family thing--my mother does the same thing.
She was diagnosed when she was commited for threatening suicide to her OB doc and WIC nurse (by taking 4 ibuprofen). She willingly signed herself in to the psych facility and then promptly tried to leave when she discovered there was no tv in her room. She had the psych doc convinced that she was just 'talking big' until the rest of the family joined in the meeting and gave our side--19 years of history with her.