Name that part. Words patients use for their own anatomy.

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Ever searched in a patients' room for what you thought she said she needed to "watch her pocketbook" , she staring at you and you staring at her. Then finally saying, mam what color is your pocketbook because I don't see a pocket book here. Only to have her say, no get my washtub out of the drawer, my washcloth and soap. I always like to wash my pocketbook before I go anywhere. Especially down for tests. And close that curtain, too. Then you say, Oh. ;)

:lol2: :lol2: :lol2: That one is tooo funny!!!

This is not quite along the same lines, but I used to work for an OBGYN. I was reading the registration sheet of one of the patients. When it asked for any previous surgeries she wrote, "cut stomach open, took baby out". Yikes!!!

Another one wrote under the section for past medical history, "5 years ago, I had the clapper." (Did the TV go on and off?) :idea:

I've heard patients call their lady partss 'geenins' which is my favourite i think. however it's not just patients, a nursing student on my course cant call lady partss or memberes by their names and calls them really stupid names depending on her mood. a 'tickle box' was her most recent! :roll

Specializes in CV/CCU, Education,Stepdown cardiac, Tele.
:jester: Heard a patient call her lady parts "the pie", the "business" and "coolie" LOL

Early in my career I took care of a lady who told me she needed help to "booboo". I had this blank stare on my face for what seemed several minutes. Finally she got really upset with me and yelled, "I have to sh.......t!!!" So I helped her to the bathroom!!

Specializes in Med-Surg, Renal, Family Practice.
We had a guy who called his member "The Boss"!!!!

lol, for alot of men, that's probably the truth! Sorry, couldn't resist that one.

:balloons:

An older woman told me when she was a young thing, she referred to her female parts as her "bouquet" but in her old age, she now calls it her "dried arrangement."

I work in a peds er too and I was talking to the child life specialist about this. She said she asks the parents what they call a child's privates so that she can properly explain procedures in the child's terms (straight caths, stuff like that). So she asks these parents of this little 4 year old girl and they state, "Oh, we call it her money maker!" YIKES! Do you want your daughter to be a prostitute??? I swear, some parent's just don't think.

wow...never heard that one before

Specializes in Public/ Home Health- New to Med Surg.

This is soo interesting and FUNNY!

It seems as most LTC residents could never be dirty or wild- but I took care of this one lady who probably never said anything dirty her whole life. One day in the whirlpool we were chatting and out of no where so snapped' Damn it- I need some more soap- I think the money maker is dirty- My jaw just fell to the floor!

Specializes in M/S, OB, Ortho, ICU, Diabetes, QA/PI.
Wanted to add to my comments, that I taught them those words a LONG time before I became a nurse. My oldest boy is 15 now and I just graduated May 2005. I find it quite funny to hear them say, "You kicked me in the testicles." or "Oh man, my member hurts." I really DON'T like hearing 'nuts' or 'balls' and have insisted that they say 'gonads', 'testicles' 'member' or 'testes' around me.

All 4 of them helped me study to become a nurse [ages 15, 13, and 11 and my daughter is 19]. As they like to say, "they are the most educated kids in their schools as far as anatomy and sex ed is concerned." :D

They very rarely say apples, and apple stem anymore.

I think no matter what you say at home, the kids are going to hear other people out in the real world and say what they say - I grew up with my parents saying "moo moo" for girl parts and "dewey" for boy parts (I couldn't tell you why) so I swore (even before I decided to be a nurse) that my kids would always hear the right anatomical words from me - fast forward 30-some years - we have always said "member" and "lady parts" and "breasts" but somehow, my 2 boys have surprised us with "wiener", "nuts", "balls", "pee pee" and "rubes" (my youngest's mispronounciation of "boobs")...........

when my oldest was in 1st grade (he's going into 4th), he came home and informed me that his friend Mark told him that instead of having memberes, girls have "lady partstors"..........

Specializes in Utilization Management.
girls have "lady partstors"..........

:rotfl: I LOVE it! Add that one to the lexicon!

And folks, remember....

She'll be back!:rotfl:

I had a older man tell me he needed to go milk a cow, couldn't figure out what he wanted....the URINAL>??

Specializes in NA - 100 years ago.

My brother used to call his "wang" a schnitzel! LOL! It was my mom's fault. She told us that's what it was. She got it from the old hot dog restaurants call "der Wiener Schnitzel." We didn't know the difference for years!

Now, you see I call it a "wang." I also call it a ween, or a peen. I call my own parts "my hoohoo." I would never say any of these in a medical situation, though! I think it's funny people do. Oh, I almost forgot, my breasts are "my booballas."

:lol2:

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