8 month old, pre-reqs and clinicals, can it be done?

purplemania, BSN, RN · Jun 11, 2004

I didn't have that problem but know plenty who did. In fact, the problem does not go away when you graduate, as you will have to balance work/home instead of school/home. Obviously, you need a dependable babysitter. I would try to schedule time to study while baby is with babysitter. Waiting till the baby is older does not help. They still have needs, even when they are teens (believe me!). I hope the baby's daddy is supportive of your career goals. Good luck.

Mandarella · Jun 11, 2004

i am in your situation. i have read many threads on this and there are many people who posted that i should wait until my kids are older. i look at it like this, my sons are 15 months and 3 months if i do this for my family now, they won't remember and i will work out a hospital schedule working 12 hour night shifts when i graduate so i won't miss any important milestones when they need me. when they get to school i will switch to a day position. i know people who have done it, it is possible. :crying2: it's breaking my heart, but it needs to be done. although i appreciate everyone's posts, the people who are telling me to stay with my kids don't understand, they aren't paying my bills, which will increase dramatically as the boys get older. the posts only made me feel worse about having to leave my kids, what i needed was support to deal with it. thier dad will be with them at night when i go to school and i will be here during the day. will it be tough? absolutely, i know this. but it is a sacrifice that needs to be made. do you have the option of doing school at night and clinicals on weekends?? that is how i am doing it. good luck to you.

hey everyone. quick question here, i am hoping that all of you women who have gone through this can give me some advice. i recieved a phone call yesterday informing me that i am # 1 on the waiting list to begin fundamentals this fall. now this is wonderful news, truly, but i am having a little doubt on time availability. i have an 8 month old and it has been just fine for me so far- i have been taking night classes and her dad watches her then. anyways to get to the point here, how many of you out there had/have small toddlers at home while taking pre-reqs and clinicals?????
i do not want to jump in over my head-i guess i should say i don't want my daughter to suffer. maybe its subcouncious guilt.....
thanks in advance for your replies, i will keep you posted on if i get in and the decision i make.

allnurses Guide · Jun 11, 2004

I'm one of the posters who mentioned that I waited until my youngest child was in school full-time before going to nursing school. I just want to say that I never posted my personal experience to make anyone feel guilty but was only responding to the question asked. For me personally, it was very difficult even then. Do you only want a rosy picture painted for you? I think hearing from all sides would actually be helpful - maybe in avoiding pitfalls others have had. Maybe taking good ideas and running with them.

And just because a child is young and will not remember does not mean that is the best time. I remember having an argument with my first husband about circumcision - it lasted throughout my pregnancy :rolleyes: . I was against it and he was for it. Lots of reasons, first and foremost being there is no real medical reason to do it. Another was pain. 21 years ago pain relief for newborns was not commonly done. My husband mentioned "Even if it hurts, he won't remember it". To that I shot back, "well then I guess it is ok to take a lit cigarette and burn him because even though it hurts at the time, he won't remember it". Keep in mind I was three days post-partum and we were still arguing about the circ and the doc had come by my room saying she needed an answer and my husband was NOT listening to me. (needless to say he is no longer my husband :)

I guess my feeling is that our kids need us at all ages and stages and picking the one the effects them the least is the challenge. For me it was while they were in school. Most of my school day was complete and I was home when they got home - until clinicals. It was a tough row to hoe . . . .

I have 4 kids ages 21 years to almost 3 years. My experience is that expenses don't "dramatically" increase until their Senior Year . . . Senior photos cost me 400 dollars, letterman jackets 200 dollars, football camp was 300 dollars. :crying2:

Please don't take what you read here as criticism but as someone sharing her own experience. Take what you wish and leave the rest . . . but don't think I'm trying to make anyone feel guilty.

Good luck with your decision and best wishes.

steph

Mandarella · Jun 11, 2004

I am sorry that you have taken my post to heart. Just to clarify a misunderstanding- in my post I stated that the people who responded to my post (and others) telling me to I should stay home was what I was referencing. Not at any time did I mention the "personal experience" posters, that is in fact because that information is of course useful to me.

As for your circumcision argument with your first husband, I am sorry it was such a battle for you. But I would not put my furthering my education for my family in the same boat as burning my kids with a cigarette, education and child abuse are very much 2 different things...but I digress.

I do in fact agree with you that finding the right time to do these things is a necessity and of course our children need us at all ages. There is no question there. Here, my choice is to do this now because "they will not remember it". My husband is here, my family as well as his are here to help also. Does that mean my kids will not need me? Absolutely not, of course they will and they will always come first. That is why I also stated it is not going to be easy, and I don't expect it to be, I will be going for a good 18 hours a day straight for 2 years dividing up my time to be with my kids. They are not left out at any point. And I do expect the challenges to come my way.

I am happy that you were able to wait until your children were in school before going to school yourself, that is ideal. And also that your expenses haven't gone up until recently, you are very lucky in that regard. But that is not everyone's situation.

Please don't think that I don't value personal insights, because that is what helps the most. My whole point was that:nono: "don't pay attention to the accusers", they mean to make you feel unsure of yourself and your situation. And often times they have no real experience in this department as it is. You take advice and experience and formulate the plan that works best for you.

Best Wishes,

Mandy

I'm one of the posters who mentioned that I waited until my youngest child was in school full-time before going to nursing school. I just want to say that I never posted my personal experience to make anyone feel guilty but was only responding to the question asked. For me personally, it was very difficult even then. Do you only want a rosy picture painted for you? I think hearing from all sides would actually be helpful - maybe in avoiding pitfalls others have had. Maybe taking good ideas and running with them.
And just because a child is young and will not remember does not mean that is the best time. I remember having an argument with my first husband about circumcision - it lasted throughout my pregnancy . I was against it and he was for it. Lots of reasons, first and foremost being there is no real medical reason to do it. Another was pain. 21 years ago pain relief for newborns was not commonly done. My husband mentioned "Even if it hurts, he won't remember it". To that I shot back, "well then I guess it is ok to take a lit cigarette and burn him because even though it hurts at the time, he won't remember it". Keep in mind I was three days post-partum and we were still arguing about the circ and the doc had come by my room saying she needed an answer and my husband was NOT listening to me. (needless to say he is no longer my husband :)
I guess my feeling is that our kids need us at all ages and stages and picking the one the effects them the least is the challenge. For me it was while they were in school. Most of my school day was complete and I was home when they got home - until clinicals. It was a tough row to hoe . . . .
I have 4 kids ages 21 years to almost 3 years. My experience is that expenses don't "dramatically" increase until their Senior Year . . . Senior photos cost me 400 dollars, letterman jackets 200 dollars, football camp was 300 dollars.
Please don't take what you read here as criticism but as someone sharing her own experience. Take what you wish and leave the rest . . . but don't think I'm trying to make anyone feel guilty.
Good luck with your decision and best wishes.
steph

allnurses Guide · Jun 11, 2004

Mandy - okay and thanks.

The example of the circumcision was simply to point out that just because kids don't remember doesn't mean it doesn't affect them. I wasn't equating getting an education with burning kids with hot cigarettes. As I said, I was frustrated with my husband and that sprang to mind.

It is great that you have a wonderful husband and family to help out. I also had family members and a great husband. It definitely helps.

The best way to do it is what I'm telling my kids . .. . as I mentioned in another thread. Get your education BEFORE marriage and kids. Forget about romance.

Anyway, everyone has to choose for themselves what works best for their family and I'd never tell anyone that they had to do it my way. My way was pretty awful anyway.

steph

All_Smiles_RN · Jun 20, 2004

I started college a little over two years ago and became pregnant shortly after starting. I attended class until I went into labor. The next semester I took all online classes to get adjusted to baby and school. My son is now over a year old and I am still taking classes full-time (granted it's not nursing classes, just pre reqs and general ed). It is not easy, but it's what I need to do. You can do anything you set your mind to. Your child is your motivation to better yourself. When you feel overwhelmed and like you just can't take it, look at the little ray of sunshine that you have and do it for her. I have faith in you. Good luck!

...Jennifer...

Loraineo · Jun 21, 2004

I started school part time when my child was about 15 months old. I can not tell you how many times it broke my heart to hear her say "Mommy are you coming home soon". Even with this struggle, I feel I did the best thing because now I can provide better for her. You need to make the choice for yourself. My best friend had a child going through school. It is hard but if you want something you can do it. Also don't think working nights will resolve the problem. You do need to sleep at times.

Trauma Columnist · Jun 21, 2004

I went to nursing school when my boys were 5 and 10 years old. It doesn't get any easier as they get older - at least that is my experience. However, I'm back in school again and my now-adult sons know the value of an education and appreciate it that both dad and mom are college-educated professionals. If I had to do it over again and had a crystal ball (lol) I too would have stayed in college before getting married. However, should have beens are just that - kinda fun to dream about but not reality.

Energizer Bunny · Jun 21, 2004

I have an eight month old as well. I also have a soon to be three year old and a four year old. The oldest will be in all day kindergarten, the rest I have to find childcare for. It is a huge struggle already to do this as I don't have much family support, but I believe we ALL can do it if we want it badly enough. I cannot afford to wait as my husband's health is not the best so now is the time for me and failing out or quitting is not an option. I wish you all the luck in the world!!!!

P.S. there are many threads about this very subject around here somewhere!

Nurse Becky · Jun 23, 2004

I just registered today, but I think of this topic a lot, so I want to add my .02 cents.

I have a 4 and 1/2 year old, 2 and 1/2 and 9 month old. I am currently finishing up my pre-reqs, and will be starting the actual nursing program in the fall of '05. Hubby and I want one more child, and I am thinking sooner rather than later. I'd rather not be in nursing school while pregnant. My hope it to get pregnant the end of this summer, deliver late spring/early summer of 2005. That will give me a few months at home with the new baby before having to start classes in the fall.

Yes, it is going to be VERY difficult to fit it all in, but I have been managing school/family so far, and I think I'll make it. I'm going to be going either nights or weekends and I'll get a babysitter to help out hubby while I'm gone. My kids won't remember mom not being around, they are too young. I think it's easier to go back to school when they are younger rather than older. I don't want to miss their soccer games, ballet recitals, etc. later on..

finchertwins, BSN, RN · Jun 23, 2004

I am one of the few guys in nursing but I understand both sides of nursing school. I am now a divorced father with 3 children, twins age 4, and 9yo. My exwife is a nurse and we were married when she went through school(no connection with the divorce). We had our twins in her 2nd semester of a ADN program. She did just fine, it was not easy for any of us but we found time for eachother and our children. I am now in nursing school, forth semester(ADN), single and have my children about 75% of the day time and 50% of the nights. It gets tight on time but it can be done, I still help coach my oldest soccer, and one of my twins teeball and the other ones soccer, I still work also. I stress to you to work out a schedule with your husband and do the best you can, your child will be fine and you can still find time for the important things in personal life and in nursing school. Manage your time well and stay on top of things and it will work out, do not let people freak you out by saying that nursing school is the hardest, toughest degree to get thats full of mean nasty instructors. True there are some like that out there but I tell you the truth you may find nursing school easier then some of the other students and those instructors nicer then the rumors you heard. Enjoy nursing school and don't make it tougher then it is, good luck.