Me, myself and Facebook

Facebook, hands up who doesn't have an account???

It appears our new life is now being controlled by this new phenomenon which had dragged many people into the 21st Century it can be fun, exciting and enables us to catch up with friends and family we may have lost touch with over the years. If you haven't been exposed to Facebook then you are probably dead or deep in a coma, and everybody has an opinion on it.

Businesses are thriving from advertising on facebooks, hundreds of jobs are being generated from it,

On the other hand it can be a very dangerous tool which is causing world wide discussions, new policies are being written and developed daily by companies to protect their workplace. Everyday we hear about problems being caused by this seemingly innocent pastime.

Employees are being fired for discussing work, or playing on there when they are off sick and somebody has seen the time and date you were on line.

Nurses are often in the spotlight because of confidentiality and the vulnerable nature of their job. Some people/patients believe that we 'the nurse' are their friends because of the care we give them during their sickness, they always remember our names when they meet us outside the hospital but how many of us remember our patients names?

In reality we are not their friends, it is our job to be kind and caring and to know everything about that patient in order to decide how best to serve them. We know their name, their age, their family members, their illnesses past and present, their job and job status, who lives with them, how many kids they have the list is endless. They share so much information with us, and to show we are interested and care we remember during their hospital stay to ask after their spouses and children each new day we look after them. So it is no wonder the line between us becomes smudged, of course we are just in the process of making the patient feel at home, to relax so that the quality of care is excellent and as we move on from room to room we hope we are doing a good job, but for some patients it must be difficult to understand or comprehend that once we leave work and go home, we leave the pts behind us, and we go on with 'normal' life.

Now we have a new concern patients want to befriend us on facebook. I for one couldnt count how many patients I have looked after in 20yrs, imagine if every other pt wanted to be my friend on Facebook-well I am just laughing out loud at the thought of it. Over the years I have met many wonderful people/patients, some who will be embedded in my memory forever, a lot who I thrust out of my mind as soon as possible and some whom I love to dread should I ever see again in my lifetime.

Here on allnurses there are heated debates concerned with such topics as "Facebook at work" "Do you add patients as your Facebook Friend"

It is an ethical and moral dilemma that should be easy to answer 'NO' you should never add a patient as a friend on facebook but like most ethical and moral dilemma;s there is never an easy answer is there?

I looked after a pt back in England for a year he had 'locked in syndrome' and eventually learned to communicate by computer he was a young patient in his early 40's. When I moved to the USA he asked me to email him which I did and still do 5 years on. It has been a very innocent relationship, he is housebound, wheelchair bound and socially isolated by his illness, his only pleasure is his computer and I have noticed recently that the emails are few and far between. I would probably not kept in touch had I lived back in the UK but felt safe being 3000 miles away and knowing his condition. I will never regret this relationship but I doubt I would have him as a facebook friend as to enjoy the site you have to have total freedom in what you communicate as it is totally open to the world.

I read on a thread today that a nurse communicated with her friend on Fb and a pt she had recently looked after was also friendly with the same friend, this pt then made a comment back to the nurse via the mutual friends page! I found this to be a little scary, we do not realize what a small world we live in.

Another friend of mine a Doctor back in the UK recently told me of something which happened to him on FB his great grandfather translated passages from the Koran and he photographed the pages to show how beautiful the writing was. This was accessed by somebody via a friend via another friend and he was subjected to racial abuse. I then went on and checked my privacy status and found my photo albums were open to everybody on facebook and I had to go in and edit each and every photo-it was not obvious by just checking the privacy you had to go into the albums themselves.

I don't know about you but I don't want my patients or my employers to view my photo's on facebook most of them are of myself, my family and friends enjoying themselves, some with drink in hand LOL. A lot of photo's are not work suitable, especially when you do education re dieting, alcohol use, smoking cessation, limitation of exposure to sun. A lot of photos contain pictures of people indulging themselves in activities you frown on in your professional life but it real life these are the photo's you love to share.

I have hundreds of fun in the sun photo's, beer in the bbq, funny photos of people falling over and everybody laughing the list is endless isn't it. But we wouldn't want our pts to disrespect us because of our home life, would we.

I think facebook is fun but it is about my personal life I want to keep it that way and I don't want to share it with my patients.

Specializes in Camp/LTC/School/Hospital.

I think facebook should be kept separate. It is personal info.

Facebook is getting annoying now. Too many changes! -- Didn't they just do changes just this past December?? Then, mini-changes after that? I had to check my FB once again yesterday... THEN, I had to look at settings again, I'd just been scanning most of my info., since I'm a little annoyed now. FB was working just fine before, freakin' changes just irk more people off! :grn: I guess that's what happens with freebies, they get annoying after a while!

Specializes in PACU, CARDIAC ICU, TRAUMA, SICU, LTC.

I have never had an inclination to join Facebook....

Specializes in Hospice.

I recently got a FB cause my husband was having fun talking to our old friends, so I got in on the action. It is kinda and fun kinda addicting. FB has always made me nervous. My wall is boring, photos limited, never do the status stuff, and comments limited. Turns out I dont really care about old friends all that much, none of them are nurses. Which is cool, but leaves me feeling all alone. I just joined this site. I want to talk nursing but am scared too. I would never use names, but still has anyone got in trouble on this site? As a new nurse who has relocated this site is therapeutic in a way. Just reading others stories or views gives me knowledge and feedback to questions I have never asked, confirmed what I thought was right, and insight of yet to come. I have visited this site many times for information during my nursing program. So I THANK ALL YOU NURSES WHO HAVE SHARED.

Maybe I'm being paranoid (or not), but I think I have a FB stalker?? lol. I don't even know how I can have a FB stalker, since my account hardly has anything in it (except for playlists and some stuff).

Maybe I also have an Allnurses stalker?? lol. .. . I have to get out of this site. It's a little addicting.

I think this is what I get from spending enough time online. Not that I do. Oh well, gotta meet new people then? lol

For everyone worried about FB, relax, it's just online interaction. You have more control than you think.

I'm so glad you brought this point up. While these forms of social networking really do benefit us in so many ways, it's always important to have some discretion when deciding who to let into your "life." Some people are too willing to allow strangers full access. I also noticed halfway through that you're from the UK and practicing in the U.S. I work for a nursing website and I was wondering if you would be willing to do an interview via email that we could post on the site to focus on what it's like working abroad in the nursing and healthcare industry. I know this is a popular issue as a lot of people are looking to move abroad to begin a nursing career. If this is something you'd be interested in, please let me know and definitely check out our website.

Specializes in Dialysis,M/S,Home Care,LTC, Admin,Rehab.

I could not agree more with you! We need to consciously not blur those patient/professional boundaries, and that is really difficult to do. Does your name badge have first and last name? I suppose that really doesn't matter..just the act of a patient asking to be friends on facebook puts us in a really bad spot, as it is difficult to say no. I am blown away by your story about the Koran translation, and the other stories as well.

I recently cancelled my fb account. The whole process got to be completely silly! 300 friends..who are friends of friends..etc. I realized that I was in regular contact with about 5 of them, and these were individuals whom I was close with "in real life" anyway. It just felt fake, for lack of a better term. I still have a page promoting my business, use other online services to share photos, and all is really well, without facebook in my life. Yippy! Thanks for the article. Great! :)

I agree that there are certain dangers to watch out for with FaceBook and other social media sites. Why? Your private information may be exposed to third parties.

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Specializes in palliative care, complex medical, etc.

Facebook is fun ... but I would watch what information I disclose to the internet world

Also once Facebook has the data you have put down, they have it all for good

DaveMoffatt RPN Toronto

I'm thinking I should get an anonymous FB page so I can have some privacy. Maybe use my dogs name.

Yup, a lot of people have fake accounts. FB doesn't really check.

Yup, FB also has FB stalkers. Everyone does it, but no one wants to admit it. I think there was a group for FB stalkers at one time. Funny postings on there.

A lot of fake accounts are usually trying to sell something though, spam people, or both.