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Male nurse crying!!!

Men   (50,760 Views 172 Comments)
by ClassQ1 ClassQ1 (Member) Member

ClassQ1 has 1 years experience and specializes in ER/ICU.

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patrick1rn is a MSN, RN, NP and specializes in Family Nurse Practitioner.

1 Article; 420 Posts; 9,670 Profile Views

I know I was being funny before about crying and stuff...

But seriously, I have been a combat medic in two wars, it has sorta of

open my eyes to things..

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Doubledee has 14 years experience and specializes in LTC, Rehab, Hospice and Telemetry.

79 Posts; 2,282 Profile Views

One of my main goals at work is to differentiate myself from my coworkers. They all ball-their-eyes out all the time. I'm the only male and they'd love to see me cry. I don't care if my coworkers cry over a pt or something personal. I get sooooo tired of women crying b/c they get their feelings hurt. It looks sooo weak and unprofessional. I don't understand how someone can get so mad they cry. Give me a break...I get teary eyed occasionally, but I would NEVER, NEVER, NEVER cry in front of people at work.

In reference to kookinitreal, I am confused by your goal to differentiate yourself from your coworkers; to be the best nurse you possibly can be is probably the greatest distinction any of us could hope to achieve. For whatever reason we men tend not to cry openly it doesn't neccessarily represent greater strength. For whatever reason the women at your job cry, it isn't neccessarily weakness. After almost 34 years of marriage and a bunch of years working as a nurse, I KNOW I don't understand women. What's more, I realize I really don't have to. I encourage you and all of us to be less judgemental. Be yourself. Accept your coworkers fo who they are.

Nursing is a tough job. Women have been toughing it out as nurses long before either of us joined the profession. Someday, their different kind of strength may help you out through a difficult situation.

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Thunderwolf has 32 years experience as a MSN, RN and specializes in Med-Surg, Geriatric, Behavioral Health.

6 Articles; 6,621 Posts; 43,908 Profile Views

An interesting point that I came across not long ago, forgot where I read it, but one differentiation between men and women in relation to stress, crying, and work burnout was how each gender tends to view contentment at work. Women in general have more of a tendency to desire to "get along and be liked at work" in defining their work satisfaction....where men tend to focus less on this requirement (within the social milieu between colleagues) as a condition in defining their own satisfaction. Again, I forget where I read it. Wish I could remember.

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dialysisguy has 7 years experience and specializes in Telemetry/Hemodialysis.

40 Posts; 1,673 Profile Views

never cried over dying pt's... felt sad for families but no tears.:crying2:

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NexLvlDad has 20 years experience and specializes in Informatics, critical care, research.

33 Posts; 1,075 Profile Views

Can't say that I ever cried at work.

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bigreddog1934 specializes in ER.

105 Posts; 2,475 Profile Views

i guess ive never cried at work but there have been more than a few boarder line moments on the way home. i work er and so its tough to find time to really think about things until were out the door at the end of the night. but yea, when i think about what we deal with and how cruel this world is to some people, it can break me down pretty good.

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texkid is a RN and specializes in Med-Surg.

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Personally, I rarely cry, but there are few exceptions.

For example: when a kid is suffering, Lion King, when i get punched in the nose

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343 Posts; 4,316 Profile Views

An interesting point that I came across not long ago, forgot where I read it, but one differentiation between men and women in relation to stress, crying, and work burnout was how each gender tends to view contentment at work. Women in general have more of a tendency to desire to "get along and be liked at work" in defining their work satisfaction....where men tend to focus less on this requirement (within the social milieu between colleagues) as a condition in defining their own satisfaction. Again, I forget where I read it. Wish I could remember.

Maslow's Hierarchy of needs is something like:

1. Physiological needs

2. Safety and Security

3. Social needs to belong and be loved

4. Self esteem to be recognized

5. Self actualization (nirvana of the mind and soul)

Men, since was written by a man, normally progress normally through the sequence as written. Exceptions may be starving artists who ignore levels one to four for their self actualization (level 5).

And now that you mention it, due to maternal instincts of a woman (who's very physiological makeup and lifetime development until metapause, centers around being a mother), they may predominantly be somewhere between 3 and 4 if in the maternal state of mind. Otherwise, we might not have offspring.

That's my hypothesis, and I'm stickin' to it, for now anyway. GOOD observation from whereever you heard it! Hmmm, I did make the correlation, so... step over Maslow, ha-ha :yeah::yeah::yeah:

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Bortaz has 10 years experience as a BSN, RN and specializes in CDI Supervisor; Formerly NICU.

1 Article; 2,627 Posts; 35,515 Profile Views

The older I get, the more emotional I become. Prior to the last 5 years or so, the only movie I'd ever seen that made me tear up was Brian's Song. Nowadays, my wife and I see at least 3 movies a month that make my throat constrict and nose runny. The Bucket List was one. So was Bridge to Teribithia.

I've teared up over things I've read on this forum many times, especially some of the stuff on the peds/nicu forums. I think having my grandbabies, and realizing that they could be going through some of the same things really touches my heart.

Now, I'm as hardcore a dude as you can find. Born and raised Texas redneck with 3 older redneck brothers, and we were all raised with that "boys don't cry" nonsense. I spent 15 years working corrections in Texas prison system, including quite a few on death row. I was a SORT member. I've done law enforcement also.

What it boils down to is, I'm becoming more emotional, and it doesn't bother me. I cried when my oldest granddaughter (about 27 months old) said "I love you, poppy" the first time, and I also teared up when she called me on the phone the first time, and I heard her saying "I wanna call poppy!".

It was the best feeling I'd ever had.

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Bortaz has 10 years experience as a BSN, RN and specializes in CDI Supervisor; Formerly NICU.

1 Article; 2,627 Posts; 35,515 Profile Views

Maslow's Hierarchy of needs is something like:

Ugh...kill it! With fire!

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4 Posts; 522 Profile Views

I did cry when my brother died - uncontrollably and shamelessly. It was during his funeral and in front of many mourners. A very personal thing it was. Seeing him still as though sleeping soundly was too overwhelming. It simply hit me and was spontaneous. It was an expression of my strong feelings that I had for him. Totally unplanned. Yes, maybe it was guilt of some kind or also some deep seated Freudian narcissist needs. I wish he hadn't died. You see, he was just 35.

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nursemike has 12 years experience as a ASN, RN and specializes in Rodeo Nursing (Neuro).

1 Article; 2,351 Posts; 14,951 Profile Views

The older I get, the more emotional I become. Prior to the last 5 years or so, the only movie I'd ever seen that made me tear up was Brian's Song. Nowadays, my wife and I see at least 3 movies a month that make my throat constrict and nose runny. The Bucket List was one. So was Bridge to Teribithia.

I've teared up over things I've read on this forum many times, especially some of the stuff on the peds/nicu forums. I think having my grandbabies, and realizing that they could be going through some of the same things really touches my heart.

Now, I'm as hardcore a dude as you can find. Born and raised Texas redneck with 3 older redneck brothers, and we were all raised with that "boys don't cry" nonsense. I spent 15 years working corrections in Texas prison system, including quite a few on death row. I was a SORT member. I've done law enforcement also.

What it boils down to is, I'm becoming more emotional, and it doesn't bother me. I cried when my oldest granddaughter (about 27 months old) said "I love you, poppy" the first time, and I also teared up when she called me on the phone the first time, and I heard her saying "I wanna call poppy!".

It was the best feeling I'd ever had.

I sometimes think the aging process comes down to life beating the silliness out of us. Many of the conceits of youth just don't stand up to the hard knocks of experience. Life tempers us.

In my previous career, I had occassion to learn about chisels. The harder the metal a chisel is made from, the finer edge it will hold, but if the metal is too hard, the tool will be too brittle to use. Softer steel is tougher, but if it's too soft, it won't hold an edge. The most useful tools, then, are hard enough to be sharp, but flexible enough not to break under pressure. And that's my goal: to be a useful tool.

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