Lost my first patient today.

[RNikkiF]

Hi all, I wasn't sure where to post this, but I have to express myself somewhere.

From the time I started nursing school, I knew the day would come when I lost my first patient... that day was today. This was a patient who we had thought was on the road to recovery, but recently suffered an infection which could delay her discharge to a nursing home closer to her home and family, so needless to say, the entire team was surprised when she went downhill quickly this morning during report.

I won't go into details, but... while it was certainly hard, the wonderful team I work with helped me so much! I wouldn't have made it through so well if it weren't for them! A new charge rn (in training) took my other four patients so I could focus on this one and the family, the charge rn stayed with the patient (and me) while we were trying very hard to turn things around for the patient. The RT, EMT and even the CNAs were right there with me the entire time! Even the psychologist came up to check on the family, and after meeting with them, she met with the care team to make sure WE were okay!

The family was already en route to the hospital when it became obvious that the patient wasn't going to make it... (my first thought on seeing her this morning when I was called to her room by the RT was "I'm going to lose my first patient today"). Anyway, the family was en route, and thankfully the spouse and one adult child made it in time (with only minutes to spare), but the other adult child and their family unfortunately didn't make it. But the entire family was so thankful for the help we gave not only the patient but them as well...

All in all, while it was by far the hardest day I've had to this point as a nurse... it was kind of a good one in the end... does that make sense???

I am wondering though if it is appropriate for me to send a card/flowers, etc. to the family?? I know I can find the address... or should I go through the facility to do that?? Thoughts?

[Black Jade, BSN, RN]

While it is difficult to lose a patient, I commend you for handling it well especially early in your nursing career.

In my opinion, I think it will be better that you send a card as group since everybody worked together to saved this patient's life.

Hugs to you RNikkiF. :hug: ...and good luck in your journey as a nurse.

[SuesquatchRN, BSN, RN]

It makes perfect sense. And hugs.

[nerdtonurse?, BSN, RN]

It never gets easy. But we're always here when you need an ear.

:hug:

[12leakec]

Send a "group card" with a bunch of nurses that work with you!!

[RHIA, RN]

I'm glad that your experience of losing your first patient went well . . . man, that sounds strange.Your last question brings out the RHIA in me. I wouldn't "find the address". I know that you have access to it but it brings to mind HIPAA and the "need to know". If you don't have the need to know to do your job then don't access it. If you feel like sending something I think it would be best to go through your facility.

[maelstrom143]

It never gets easier losing a patient, but you did what you could and it seems as if your facility worked in concert for the good of the patient and family involved.

As to sending a card, I would probably want to go through your facility and send it as a group card, since you all were involved in the care.

Best of luck!

[kss0740]

Hugs :redbeathe

[Tait, MSN, RN]

:hug:

I have only gone outside of the hospital on two occasions to celebrate the life of a patient I had. One was a young man who we took care of so often that his mom would send us Christmas cards each year with his picture on them (he was a complex, complete care who mentally stopped developing around 3). She would raise holy heck if he wasn't on our floor and we loved taking care of him. The other was a patient's wife who passed from cancer earlier this year. They had become close with my family after he was discharged.

Other than that, despite the sadness of loss, I have never sent a card or flowers to the family of patient who has passed. However this doesn't mean you can't. I would talk to your manager and the other nurses on the floor to see if they have an opinion on it.

Take care of yourself :)

Tait

[amarilla, RN]

:hug:

Hugs and kudos for being both sensitive to the family and thankful to your other team members who worked with you to try to save this patient. I agree with others that perhaps a card signed by the team or your group of floor nurses would likely be more appreciated by the family as well as appropriate.

Take care and be kind to yourself. :heartbeat

[TiffyRN, BSN, PhD]

In my unit, when we lose one of our infants, the chaplain makes a sympathy card available to all the staff to sign then they send it to the family. In a time of loss, most families cherish hearing anything positive about their loved one.

Of course it's always appropriate to check with your manager, but a card from all the caregivers would surely be okay. Also, often there will be a notice in the paper with a funeral home. With such a public notice, it would be hard to claim any kind of breach of HIPAA violation if one were to send it to the funeral home.

Maybe your chaplain dept. can help out? Maybe we are spoiled, but the chaplain services where I work are the best I've ever experienced.

[RNikkiF]

Thank you all for your support! I will check with my manager. (Just to clarify I would never go into a pt's record to get an address to send a card... or for any nonnursing function. I was thinking google search but now I see that even that could be misconstrued.). Thanks for the tips!