Least Favorite Things Patients Say

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What are some of your least favorite things that you hear from your pts? Of course we are all nurses to help people, but some responses from pts make for an instant eye roll. My least favorite thing is when pts ask to take their morning medications when they "wake up". I work nights, and I hear that ALL the time. This is one of the few times that I can be firm with a pt, especially if they are on something like vanco and need specific blood levels or I will usually just tell them that I can come back in 15-20 min, and if they don't want it at that time then I will "pass it to day shift" which usually means it won't get done. (Not knocking day shift. It just happens that day shift wont pass meds for a couple of hours after report and the med might be do again. So they just ask me to document against it./say they refused it.)

There are plenty of instances where the pt gets to make decisions like when they take their meds, but I'm not staying late to pass meds because a pt not wanting to wake up at 0630.

Specializes in Public Health, TB.

"Can you have the doctor come back, I forgot to tell him something." No ma'am, she's got a bazillion other folks to see, and 4 nurses and 2 consultants trying to speak with her. You're lucky you got as much time as you did.

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Anything whispered.

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What do they whisper? :nailbiting:

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"What is his/ her weight today?"

....asked of the critically ill, intubated, barely-hanging-onto-life baby with 20 drips, tubes everywhere, on HFOV and NO, who has coded 10 times in the last hour.

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Specializes in Urgent Care, Oncology.

Me: Do you have any chronic medical conditions?

Pt: No.

Me: Do you take any medications on a daily basis?

Pt: Simvastatin, Metformin, Losartan, Amlodipene

Me: So why do you take all those medications for?

Pt: Oh, I HAD diabetes, high cholesterol, and high blood pressure but I take medications for those issues so now I don't have them anymore.

*Head, desk*

Pt: Can I get a note for a week off work? (Pt. has minor cold)

*eye roll*

Me: So you're here for a drug screen today?

Pt: Yes, but I just peed 5 minutes ago in the waiting room. I can't go now. (Pt. waited 6 minutes in waiting room.)

*sigh*

Me: So what brings you in today?

Pt: I'm sick.

Me: Can you be more specific?

Pt: I don't know, I'm just sick.

Me: What are your symptoms?

Pt: I have a cold.

Me:......

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What do they whisper? :nailbiting:

You have to stop what you're doing, walk over to their bed and lean in real close and it's usually something like, "is it raining outside?"

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Specializes in PACU, pre/postoperative, ortho.

"You only get one stick!"

"Anesthesia always has to start my IVs."

"I'm allergic to morphine, codeine etc. It makes me puke."

Me: Do you have a DNR?

Pt/family: Yes, you should have a copy.

Me: We have a Living Will...

Pt: Yep that's it!

Me: So you don't have a DNR.

Pt: Yes it is written in that Living Will form, no CPR.

SMH

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Specializes in Urgent Care, Oncology.

I had a pt. the other day that said he had to be stuck 14 times the last time somebody drew blood. I got him on the first try. :)

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Specializes in Urgent Care, Oncology.

Oh, another one:

Pt: My mom's cousin is allergic to Penicillin so I'm allergic to Penicillin too. :sarcastic:

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I screen patients all day some of my favorites:

Me: do you take any medications?

Pt: yeah the red one and the blue one and sometimes the white one

Me: I see you had your gallbladder removed last week are you in any pain today?

Pt: oh god yes

Me: if you had to give it a number 1-10 10 being the worst pain you could imagine what would you say it is

Pt: ehh not too bad like 7 or a 8

Me: I'm very sorry to hear that, can you explain where the pain is and how it feels?

Pt: oh my back and ankles have been hurting for years I've got OA but my stomach feels fine

Me: *facepalm

Hmmm had someone sit on the rolly stool a couple of weeks ago after I asked them to take a seat on the table

Me: sir do you have any allergies?

Pt: nope

Me: well I see here in your information they listed codeine, penicillin and sulfa drugs?

Pt: oh yeah that's what I meant

Me: do you have any immediate family history of cancers or bleeding disorders?

Pt: yes my great aunts third cousin I think had some kind of cancer

"There's no way that's my blood pressure..." On the third try

Patients tell me they have no pain and when the doc comes in they'll tell them how their pain is actually 9/10

Me: sir do you drink alcohol or use tobacco products

Pt: no alcohol and yes tobacco

Me: alright how do you take your tobacco?

Pt: cigarettes

Me: and about how many cigarettes would you say you smoke per day?

Pt: oh I quit smokin 25 years ago

Can't stand overly zealous family members who for whatever reason think they know more than everyone in the room and shame their SO's about their history or vital signs

And my last one and probably biggest pet peeve is when they think I'm done taking vitals and they start taking everything off

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Specializes in NICU, PICU, educator.

--I googled that...

--I'd rather talk to a doctor (after going into a lengthy discussion about what they asked) OK, here's the resident who doesn't know squat.

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Specializes in CVICU.

My biggest pet peeve is when patients tell you to do something as opposed to asking. I get that they are in a vulnerable position and we are there to help them, blahblah but this is basic manners. You do not say, "Get me more water." or "Give me my pain medicine.", you say (ideally) "Could I have some water, please?" (

If a patient isn't on their death bed and says something like this, I will say something like "Please ask me for what you want instead of demanding it." Ganey scores be damned.

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