Just Started Nursing School!

SleeepyRN · Jan 27, 2013

I know its easier said than done, but your focus shouldn't be on fitting in. It should be focused on your studies. My experience with nursing school was that it was very click-ish. I would see these groups of "friends" hanging out, then I would see these same "friends" talk about each other behind their backs. I recommend only "talking shop" so to speak around these people. You DO have a common ground with each and every person, regardless of age. Nursing. So when you're sitting waiting for class to start, find something to add to a conversation that has to do with an exam or an assignment. When you start working, you're going to be working with the same wide age range and you will have to get along. Its just my experience and my opinion, but don't make "friends." Acquaintances with light conversation is good, but make your real friendships outside the nursing realm. If you only take my advice on one thing, take this advice: Don't get sucked in by gossip. That's often how immature people make "friends." You don't want to be associated with that. After graduation, you may need these people to network with, so make the best impression. And that impression is that you're trustworthy.

ADN2B · Jan 28, 2013

While you choose classify your classmates as though they are old enough to be your grandmother, they are probably classifying you as immature.

lumbarpain, ADN, RN · Jan 28, 2013

One thing you have to remember when you attend any school.....THIS IS YOUR FUTURE thats at stake here...if you want to become a celebrity, try getting on American Idol. I dont mean to be mean, but this is the truth, we all need friends or close acquaitences when attending a strange school, I was 33 when I went to nursing school. my girlfriend who I made friends with was 28. We got along great. And as long as we were together, who cared what everyone else was doing, most times you wont even ever meet those people again in your lifetime. So dont worry about the popularity of it all, just do your work, impress the instructors, pass the tests and you will be fine. If you manage to make some friends, all well and good but dont let them deviate you from your studies. I had a male friend of mine who used to come over to study but had OTHER ideas and then fall asleep .....ok? good luck. I wish I were young again.

jetsy62 · Jan 28, 2013

I have the same fears as the OP. Will be 18 when I start nursing school in the fall after I graduate high school. It will be the first time I am away from home and I too wonder about "finding my place". I can not imagine spending the next four years (excluding summers) away from family and friends and not making new friends. Not saying it is my top priority, obviously that would be my studies, but I would hope somewhere along the way making friends is in there. I plan to get involved with some clubs, school activities, etc. Being young, single, responsible for no one but myself .... maybe that is the difference between the OP and the other students. Just a guess. Do the other students live on campus or are they commuters? That would make a huge difference I would think also. Good luck and I hope you are able to make some new friends soon.

SleeepyRN · Jan 28, 2013

The OP has only posted 2 posts on this site. Both are about making friends. This site has a wealth of information and advice at your fingertips. When your only posts are about how to make friends, I then have to wonder at the maturity of the poster. It doesn't sound like either of you are prepared for the realities of nursing school. During my school's information session, the instructors told us "tell your family and friends to say goodbye to you for the next 2 years." It was said in a lighthearted way, but... it was true. Sure, I spent hours and hours in my science and gen ed classes, but when it came time for my core nursing classes and clincals, well, there is just no comparison. I guess you won't understand til you get there. You can have zero responsibility for anything but your nursing classes and have it still be the most challenging time in your young life.

SleeepyRN · Jan 28, 2013

I just started college and my study is nursing. I'm starting out great, though nursing classes haven't yet started. I'm still trying to adapt to college life & the only thing that seems to bug me at my small college ( Brown Mackie ) is that I am only 18 and I'm surrounded by people that are minimum 5+ years older and some even could be my grandma! I need advice in fitting in with the other older nursing students and how to handle being on my own since at the moment they don't want anything to do with me because I'm so young..

Also, it is your perception that they "don't want anything to do with you because you're so young." Maybe nobody is running up to you and grabbing your hand to be friends is because they are focused on THEIR lives and THEIR studies. I have a feeling you're going to hear this many times, but it is not all about you. I'm not trying to be mean. I'm really not. I just don't think you're preparing yourself the best you can for what is about to come. Please think about that.

jetsy62 · Jan 29, 2013

Wow, I thought I had prepared myself for the realities of nursing school but maybe not. As stated, I am a senior in high school so I know I have a lot to learn about life. In fact, most of "life" I have yet to learn. But I believe I have prepared myself as much as a high school student can. I have a 98.97 GPA, am taking microbiology and A&P as electives this year to get a foundation for things to come in nursing school, have maintained grades and community service to earn over $86,000 combined in scholarships from two different nursing schools (will have to choose which one to attend) and have worked summers since I was 15 at a local amusement park and have saved over $7000 for school. I did not research the OP to see what they have posted about previously, just took the post at face value with her saying she was having trouble making friends but would like some. From my college visits, something they stressed to all students that will be living on campus is to get involved in something. Don't just bury your nose in your books, hide out in your dorm and isolate yourself from everyone and everything. I am very fortunate in that I knew early what I wanted to do with my adult life, my family has prepared as well as we can for me to be successful with my goals, and it is up to me once I get there to make it happen. Naive I may be, but I truly do hope I make friends when I get there. Four years of nursing school and living on campus will be a miserable place if making friends is detrimental to my success and somehow that seems counterproductive. Guess I will see when I get there. I am posting this because I am making an assumption (yeah, I know) that I am the "other" one that is not prepared for the realities of nursing school. I truly have prepared to the best of my abilities to this point, I think.

HouTx, BSN, MSN, EdD · Jan 29, 2013

Honestly, my concern for the OP is her choice of school. Have heard terrible things about B-M schools at many locations. Hope her experience is better & that she is mature and assertive enough to speak up if something is not right.

Meriwhen, ASN, BSN, MSN, RN · Jan 29, 2013

Moving to General Nursing Student forum for more targeted responses.

Best of luck with school!

Stephalump · Jan 29, 2013

Oh, I don't think the "your focus shouldn't be fitting in" spiel is really accurate in this case. I'm sure we've ALL spent plenty of time with Erikson and his developmental stages. And we've all spent time as 18 year olds fresh out of high school where it's all about fitting in and having friends. OP is completely normal.

I wish I had some great advice for you. Are you at a traditional university or a commuter college? I think your school sounds like one of the for-profit schools? Those tend to be for older students who need more accessibility. Have you considered going to a regular school? With people your own age? Dorms? Parties? You're way too young to be isolated and drowning it debt.

rubato, ASN, RN · Jan 30, 2013

I will give you some advice from one of those nursing students old enough to be your grandmother (well, almost). I am just as scared about fitting in and finding my place as you are! I know that it looks like we're calm and together, but we're not. We've just had years to adapt and hide things better.

Walk up to people, start talking shop, and don't worry about fitting in. Like someone else wrote, you all have nursing school in common. It's a huge commonality.