Is it just me, or is this rude, sexist, and condescending?

[RNdynamic]

I am a male nurse on an inpatient unit in a hospital who began a couple months ago. Recently I used the bathroom in the staff lounge, and after I left to sit down at the nurses station, an older female nurse came up to me grinning and whispering,

"Hi, I followed you after you used the bathroom, and used it next. I want you to know, the ladies here will be annoyed with you if you leave the toilet seat up after you use the toilet. We had a previous male nurse who the ladies became angry at because he didn't put the seat back down. I would put the seat back down if I were you."

I interpreted this to mean that really, she, rather than anyone else, wanted me to put the seat back down.

Is it really this person's job to be a toilet police? At least I actually put the damn seat up I can't count how many times I've found urine sprayed all over a toilet seat in the down position after a woman used it because she "hovered." I have to say, I found the comment sexist and condescending and am thinking of reporting it. What do you think?

[la_chica_suerte85, BSN, RN]

Oh hell just put the seat back down.

[la_chica_suerte85, BSN, RN]

OMG. You are so right. Have any of you had your scrub drawstring knot at the worst possible time?!

Yes!!!

[la_chica_suerte85, BSN, RN]

That's great. However, let's for example say that I were to correct some woman on the unit about her toilet etiquette, how much do you want to bet that she would be successful in reporting me for some form of "sexual harassment?"

No, no, just don't. Don't even start there.

[Snawdad]

You didn't mention what color the toilet seat was? If it is black, use a small amount of black shoe polish to smear on the lid. If its white, it could warrant a little clear gel applied sparingly? Be careful though as you might get busy and sit on it yourself. Not good.

On second thought, just forget the whole issue. Just try and get along and put the lid down.

Just be ready the next time should your 'helpful' co-worker brings something else up. :)

[Suckitupbuttercup]

I tend to believe that her "advice" was not meant to be sexist, simply to clue you in as to how the women on that floor may react... Possibly to save you further grief... Now if she went and posted something like this⬇️... You might have a case...

[FolksBtrippin, BSN, RN]

Report her?

Are you serious?

For what?

[ThatOneDude822]

I will NEVER understand women who get angry that men leave the seat up. Men have to lift it every time to use it and they (usually) don't complain. I just put the seat down, do my business, and get on with my day. Putting it down literally takes less than 1 second. There are more important things to worry about than the position of the toilet seat.

I don't think I'd go as far to report her, but just keep doing your thing and if she brings it up again tell her that you didn't realize she was the potty police.

If a guy is having an "emergency," it isn't always crucial for him to put the seat up. Even if they don't have the greatest "aim," there's also the option to sit.

Women, on the other hand, don't have much of a choice. The seat pretty much HAS to be down for them.

So, if a woman is having trouble holding her bladder, bad things can happen if she doesn't notice the seat is up. Whereas if a man is having trouble holding his bladder, it's not necessarily the end of the world if he ends up having to use the toilet with the seat down.

I think it makes the most sense for EVERYONE, regardless of sex/gender, if toilet seats are just left down.

[kbrn2002, ADN, RN]

Something must be wrong with me that I wasted about 15 minutes on a Saturday night, on my weekend off no less reading 8 pages of a thread on whether the toilet seat should be up or down!

OK, it was actually kind of fun.

ps seat down, dude!

[acim]

I don't know...maybe I'm reading more into this than there really is but sounds like there is something deeper going on...? I mean he's already the 'new kid on the block' as far as the unit goes working in a predominantly female gendered workforce...I don't know, maybe he just wanted to be a nurse with patients to care for and not the guy who left the toilet seat up. Or maybe he was having a particularly bad day. Who knows. OP, if she gets weird about your toilet habits again then I'd consider some things. In the meantime, don't let it get you down. Make a joke about it if you can...just try not to give yourself a headache about this.

[Murse9185]

"Butt hurt"! My new favorite thing to say.

Haha yes!! People always give me the weirdest looks when I say this.

[annie.rn]

One day, I left a note on the wall behind the toilet for my fellow "hoverers." It read something about how I don't like to sit in OPP (Other People's Pee) so please aim for the big hole in the middle.

Guess you're not "down with O.P.P." Or Naughty by Nature.

[young,dumb&happy]

The seat up vs. seat down reminds me of the other bathroom debate: which side should the toilet paper be facing when you pull it out, under or over???

We can argue about this forever and BOTH sides have their pros and cons.

As a woman myself, yes I would like for the seat to always be down but my real question is: am I the only one that uses toilet seat covers?? I've mastered the art of putting the seat down and placing the cover on in one quick motion in under 1 second! So personally, I don't care either way but like many have said before me, this is NOT the hill you should die on!