IPN issues- 2015

[NurseEmRN]

I was employed at a hospital January 2012- August 2014. I have 8 years experience as an RN, with NO issues. I was working as charge RN on PCU ( critical care unit), having worked my way up from staff RN. I was what you called " a nurse's nurse". I worked overtime, helped everyone out, and took on the difficult patients etc. My patient satisfaction score was high, and my yearly evaluation was excellent. I loved my job, my coworkers, and the patients. I love being a nurse.

In May 2014- my "husband" ( been together 23 years not legally married) attempted suicide. He has serious depression - and it cycles. This was from a car accident when he was 19 yrs old. He was in a coma for a week, and has been dealing with this mental illness ever since. I was working alot so I didn't realize how bad he was getting until the night he tried to hurt himself( he had been having "episodes" since feb. and would call me at work crying, and yes that affected me too). I tried to stop him and he attacked me, and I called the police on him. He went to jail. I also found out he was having an affair. I was devastated.

Not only was I dealing with the above, but I was having issues with my gallbladder/liver( pancreas?). I worked and was sick, with severe RUQ pain and nausea/vomiting. It became worse in June, and I had some imaging done. I was supposed to get an ERCP but I was terminated before I could use my insurance to do the testing.

The DON - saw me sick in the parking lot! I still went to work ( when I could) - and worked a lot for this hospital.

On top of that, my mother was in the hospital at the same time with sepsis and pancreatitis. So it was a ROUGH couple of months for me. But NEVER was I so emotionally upset or physically ill that I was a danger to public safety/patient care.

The first time I even knew anything was " amiss" with my nursing was after I told my boss about my husband attacking me etc., and I called out of work for a couple of days. My manager said " we need to talk. do you have anything to tell me? I said no , why? I had already told her everything about what I was going through, I had nothing to hide. I thought she was concerned about me. She stated" we had a nurse here once who's husband did the same thing and she was taking meds home to him". I said, "excuse me? She said that it has come to her attention that I was not wasting meds until the end of shift. I explained to her that no, WE all don't waste until the end of the shift because we are so freaking busy that we don't have time to stop for every waste in the pyxis. That is a bad nursing habit, but it is the real world of nursing. We all watch each other waste, and we all waste at the end of the shift. I told her that even all the ICU nurses do it, and it was common practice in our units. She checked in on this and guess what? There were signs up everywhere to "waste meds when you pull them " and there was a big to-do with all the nurses. So they couldn't write me up for that. The next thing I know - I am getting a "talk" again, this about charting a pain scale of 0 then half an hour later giving a pain med. It happens. Someone was a 0, then they started to hurt. Now, I have been at this hospital for almost 2 years and I have NEVER had in issue, now all of a sudden I feel that it's a "witch hunt" to get rid of me. All this has happened since I told them about my husband. My manager went behind my back and asked my patients if they received their pain meds, and they all said yes ( and what a great nurse I am etc.). So I had sign a paper that said" I will make sure I document pain scale accurately " ( something like that). So then a week or two later, I get a call saying I needed to come in and meet with the ADON and my manager.

I show up, and the ADON - tells me- "I don;t know what kind of nurse you are, but I don't like you."

Huh? They proceed to tell me that I am in "trouble", for not scanning all my meds ( they only care about the narcs- not antibiotics, IV fluids, or any of the other meds I didn't scan). Then they ask me about the 1 mg of morphine, and 0.25 mg of morphine I didn't waste in the pyxis. Over almost 2 years, these are the only two things I didn't waste in the pyxis ? She "assumed I gave them" therefore I gave a dose larger than was ordered- I am sure I charted in the computer the correct dose, but may have been so busy I forgot to do so in the pyxis. Geez, I know a lot of the nurses I worked with who forgot to waste meds too but they still have jobs. Or whose scans rates were really low. They are still working. Then she states i gave narcotics to a patient within 24 hours of discharge, and this was against policy. What policy? I have been a nurse long enough to know that we medicate patients 2-4 hrs up to discharge. This patient stayed an extra 4 days after his "supposed " discharge. This same patient was a pain in the butt- a "pain management -pt". He was on a TON of oral pain meds, plus a patch, plus he was evaluated for pain meds from a pain management doctor in the hospital. This doctor prescribed all his home pain meds, including dilaudid 2 mgs every 2 hours as needed. The surgeon who worked on this pt discontinued his most of his home pain meds, so yes, the pt needed pain meds every 2 hrs. I called the doctor several times to address this pt's pain complaints, and charted everything. I am told that I gave this pt more meds than any other nurse for one shift. This pt was self medicating when he first came in with his secret "stash" that I told his girlfriend not to bring in. You take away someone's meds and give them lower doses, they have issues. He was angry, and a clockwatcher. I took care of him for a week, trying to help him not be so angry and miserable. I never gave him medication outside what was ordered. ADON even checked the times I gave it-( every three hrs not just every 2) my manager asked this pt if he received his meds, and he said yes. ADON says " do you know what this looks like?'" I was completely blown away by all this, and felt like there was nothing I could say or do. I was not disciplined or warned about any of this. Then "threatened" - "contact IPN or I turn you into the board of nursing". 2 day window. I worked 7 days in a row for them when they were so short - staffed they couldn't get any one in to cover. I worked my ass off for this company and I feel like something's not right. I feel like I was wrongly terminated. If they thought I was having a problem- why not offer me a leave of absence? I had a lot going on in my personal life, but I never was a danger to patient safety- or violated the nurse practice act.

I guess I was just another warm body to them.

So I called IPN, and the intake lady told me they treated " burnout- stress, mental issues, not just drugs or alcohol issues". I thought I would get evaluated then be able to work. Get therapy, etc. I was wrong.

My first evaluator stated I was fine and had no issues.( except for mental health - recommended therapy etc.) I had a hair test done and it was positive for tramadol, which I had taken from a friend who told me it was not a controlled substance. Well, tramadol just became a controlled substance the end of August, and I didn't know that. But NOTHING else.

Then I had to do a repeat hair test, and it was negative. I tried looking for work and of course it is very hard to find a job with "key restriction" ( I was told this was because I didn't scan my meds all the time). In the mean time I have had negative UAs, one dilute, one abnormal.

About 5 - 6 weeks ago I was really sick. I had a migraine, sinus infection, and acute gallbladder/pancreatic pain. I dark urine, clay stools, RUQ severe pain, and nausea/vomiting. I was a mess. The only thing I kept down was smoothies- when I could keep something down. I also mix my smoothies with liquid vitamins. I was sick for approx. 3-4 days. All I had were smoothies. I had to pee in a cup while this was going on, and tested positive for ETG( etg?) So I was surprised when I found that out. Of course my case manager thinks I am a total boozer now, not taking into consideration that all my other tests are negative. So I offer to take a PEth test, and she declines stating I need to be "reevaluated". I did , and the new addictionologist didn't think I had any problems. I explained to him the only thing I found with ethanol in it was my liquid vitamins- 5.7%) and I sent him the label. I had used a different brand before that didn't have any etoh in it- ( GNC) but since I have no income I used a "bargain" brand that didn;t show ethanol on the website- who puts ethanol in vitamins??? Anyway, a week later ( 4wks from my positive UA) I have to take a PEth test. Another 2 weeks go by, and I see on the affinity website it is positive. Another week goes by ( today) I find out that IPN requires me to go to INPATIENT HOSPITALIZATION for my alcohol issue. *****?? My level was 27- and the cutoff was 20- I have read several conflicting reports on PEth, and I can assure you that I have not been consuming the required 7-8 drinks a day for 2 weeks to get that number. I have never had any issue with alcohol or drugs, I have never even asked for pain meds with my RUQ pain, or my ovarian cyst pain. Anyway - needless to say I feel like telling IPN what to do with their "recommendation". I can get a second opinion - should I? I have no income to pay for this new IPN requirement. I worked hard to be a nurse, and I am sad that this is what nurses who have issues have to go through. I didn't even know you could talk to a lawyer before signing an IPN contract!! I was forced into this, and I wasn't even in my right frame of mind. I was burnt out from work, and my personal life. I felt like I had no choice.

I tripped in urine during this time at this hospital and had to do a random UA- it was negative.

So, history for me- childhood abuse, and sexual assault while I was working as an RN in the middle east 2010-2011. I am in therapy, and that's really all I needed. Time off from work, and therapy. Not more stress, or inpatient rehab!!! I went from having NO issues with and substance - now I am a raging , unsafe alcoholic......the power of IPN!!! Unbelievable.

I thank you for your time, and look forward to talking to you. I appreciate any advice you may have. Please let me know if there is anything else I can provide for you that may help you evaluate my case.

Sorry that I rambled- I wanted to get everything out - I am sure you hear from nurses with worse cases than mine. I am grateful for any information you may have regarding my situation- If you think I have a case- I could sell my car. But I not going to rehab.

I went to school after I got fired- I graduated with my esthetician license. I am currently looking for a job in this field, since I can't take the Hospice job I got accepted for due to my "alcohol addiction"....seriously - IPN is not a good program for nurses. I would eventually like to start a fund for nurses going through this- to help pay attorney /rehab/ testing etc costs since they don't have jobs either.

Sincerely,

NurseEmRn

( felt good to write my story - and get it all out!)

letter to potential attorney

Am I crazy??????? I am now!!!!!!

[VivaLasViejas, ASN, RN]

What a cluster. I am so sorry about your ordeal. Glad you have an attorney representing you now. (((HUGS)))

[CryssieD]

Glad to see you fighting back--these people really do have too much power. It's a shame that something so important (help for genuinely sick nurses) has been turned into a witch hunt; the holier-than-though attitudes and assessments that identify normal people as raging alcoholics/addicts are really disheartening--but it is true that when all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.

Sorry for your problems--hope it works out. Keep us posted.

[catsmeow1972, BSN, RN]

heh! you must have been to the same evaluator I went to. A single instance of diversion (yes a stupid move, even though mental health related, still stupid, still consequences, etc, etc, etc.) of a non-scheduled med (yes i tried to off myself, so I'm fine with the mental health aspects, doing much better now, thank you). Courtesy of a complete joke of an evaluation, I got tagged with "opiate dependent". Say what? With NEVER a positive on any drug test? Even though the shrink wrote "appears to be more of a mental health than substance abuse problem", I still got suckered into 6 months of in and outpatient drug/alcohol treatment. That messed with my head in ways that I don't even want to revisit. i could comprehend the idea of even an inpatient mental health thing, but you realize that that's not near as lucrative moneywise. This crappy place did'nt even let me see the psychiatrist unless i requested. Interestingly, I don't smoke, drink and never have, and have zero desire to start. This "interventional" program holds my license and livelihood by the cojones. I think it is a reasonable thought that the "approved" evaluators and IPN are in cahoots. Yes i know, quite the conspiracy theory, but you can't make this stuff up! Nobody ever said beans about finding my own shrink to do the evaluation (like one that does not have a financial interest in some treatment center). All i can say is, if i only knew.....

i really wonder about the ethics, or lack thereof of the people that run this stuff. Not a day goes by that i don't have to do something related to IPN, usually involving the expenditure of money. I do also resent the control they have over my life. i can't go on vacation without asking them. I can't even take the meds my doctor prescribes without clearing it with them. i had a death in the family, i had to tell them. Geez, why not put an ankle bracelet on me. This is just awesome for the depression/anxiety issues.

Sorry about the long winded rant, but this is life in IPN. Royally sucks. i am sure there are people that value the program and attribute their sobriety to it and that's fabulous, whatever it takes. Those are the folks that this thing was meant to help, but the rest of us who are caught up in this seemingly never-ending nightmare, it is frustrating and useless.

[NurseDiane]

Let me first say that I am so sorry that this happened. Dealing with any "recovery" program through the state or any Board of Nursing is an exercise in futility. Their job is to collect money so that their salaries are paid, and they do that by sentencing people to expensive, countless "evaluations" with specific people, urine & hair testing, counseling, peer groups, etc. etc. etc. There's a reason why they only give you one or two options for getting the evaluations---one hand washed the other.

*** is an "abnormal drug screen"? What is "abnormal" about it? Are there drugs in it or not? And, saying that the dilute urine screen was "obviously tampered with" is an opinion, not based on any facts at all. Isn't it funny that everything in nursing & medicine now is "evidence based", EXCEPT in cases like this? In cases like this, NOTHING has to be based on evidence----if they say the sky is falling, the sky is falling. It is total *******.

Secondly, this just further proves my belief that the Boards of Nursing are devious and nothing but bullies that are out to destroy people's lives. Who hasn't taken a random pain pill when they've had a migraine or torn ligament or something very painful? If you can't drive because you have a migraine, how in the hell are you supposed to get to a doctor to get a prescription? Kidney stone? If you've had them before, are you supposed to go to the ER every time you get one, or wait 2 days until you can get into a urologist? Hell no. Nurses get treated like they are total idiots & don't know how much hydrocodone to take. It is mind boggling.

Nursing & healthcare has become a punitive environment, and that creates a lot of problems when nurses are terrified to do something wrong. Your personal life is nobody else's business, and being asked "Do you have anything to tell me?" was ridiculous. I would have said "Why, yes I do have something to tell you. You're an ******* & my home life is none of your ********** business, you blowhard." Having an ADON tell you "I don't like you" is out of line, and it would have been great if you had that on a recording to play back during a deposition.

You can get altered results on a PEth test if you have liver or gallbladder disease. Did you tell anyone about you gallbladder issues prior to the PEth test? Make sure your attorney knows about that. And, no matter how much it costs---sell your jewelry, your TV, whatever it takes to pay for it---GET A HAIR TEST DONE before you face the BON. Also, do some research on ethyl glucoronide, and the testing you had done.

" Ethyl glucuronide (EtG) is a metabolite of ethyl alcohol which is formed in the body by glucuronidation following exposure toethanol, usually from drinking alcoholic beverages. It is used as a biomarker to test for ethanol use and to monitor to document alcohol abstinence in situations where drinking is prohibited, such as by the military, in professional monitoring programs (health professionals, attorneys, airline pilots in recovery from addictions), in schools, liver transplant clinics, or in recovering alcoholicpatients.^[1][2] In addition to its use to monitor abstinence and detect drinking EtG also has potential for monitoring amount of alcohol use over time because it can be detected in hair and nails, though the effectiveness of this has not yet been proven.^[3][4]A disadvantage of the test is that because EtG can be detected in samples at very low levels, it can also be positive after exposure to alcohol from non-beverage sources, or incidental exposure, which can lead to false positives. The sources of possible exposure in the environment are numerous and include alcohol in mouthwash, foods, over-the-counter medications, and even from inhalation of alcohol from topical use. It is impossible with this biomarker to distinguish small amounts of drinking from extraneous exposure to alcohol"

Any future conversations with ANYONE---counselor, evaluating physician/therapist/counselor---should be recorded in their entirety. It's too bad you didn't have a recorder going when you had the evaluation with the addiction doc. $850 for 30 minutes is criminal. And I firmly believe that IPN gets a kickback from the people they "recommend" their VICTIMS to see.

Have your lawyer subpoena the addiction doc for a deposition before the hearing. Make sure your lawyer asks him how much of his business is doing evaluations for IPN, how much he charges for each evaluation, how long the evaluations take, how many evaluations he does on a daily basis, how many evaluations he has done in the past 3 months, how many he does in a calendar year, if the source of his referrals for evaluations comes ONLY from IPN or from other sources as well, if he has any other private practice or job other than doing evaluations, what kind of past education & experience he has & where he got his education in addiction medicine, if he is board certified in addiction medicine, what he did before he started doing evaluations for IPN, if he gives anything back to IPN in the form of money, "favors", "kickbacks" or other "fringe benefits" for receiving so many referrals from them, if he is paid anything from the IPN payroll, how he got involved as a referral provider by IPN, how much he makes annually from evaluations done pursuant to IPN referral, and how many people he has given a "failing" report to for IPN out of all of the evaluation he has done in the last year. Have your attorney ask him what, exactly, made him conclude that you had "episodic drunkeness and why he believed that you had been "drinking for a month"----did he base his "belief" on you saying that you sucked down 15 beers a few weeks ago or that you've been drinking every day for a month, or what? (Because he would have no other way to justify his "beliefs".) Make him explain his "beliefs" that he wrote in his report. This is a VERY IMPORTANT part of this process. Have your attorney get an adjournment of the hearing to be able to do the deposition of this addiction medicine doc who did you evaluation. Then take this guy to the cleaner in front of the board---and videotape it if you can, to put on YouTube for the world to see how totally f'ed up this process is, and how much control these idiots have over your life. And if you can, have your attorney do a video deposition of this blowhard. If they can put your name on a public website for the world to see for the rest of time, then you can do it too. Recording probably isn't allowed, so do it "stealth". I would L-O-V-E to see that. You'd get 100 trillion hits on YouTube & you'd never have to work again!!

You can't be fired for alcoholism---it is recognized as a disability by the feds and protected by the "Americans With Disabilities Act." File a complaint with the Equal Opportunity Employment Commission, and then find a lawyer to sue the hospital. Alcoholism is a covered disability & you cannot be fired because of it. Plus, the hospital has to prove, beyond reasonable doubt, that you have a substance abuse/alcohol addiction. With the evidence you've told us, it fails to prove that you are a drug addict or alcoholic. Let the hospital defend that lawsuit. Maybe you'll own the hospital when that lawsuit is over, LOL! Then you can fire the ADON that doesn't like you. Talk about poetic justice.

The thing that is totally unethical about the process with any BON is that they have "administrative power"---that means that they do not have to "prove" the charges. They can go on assumptions or beliefs, which is total ********. Can you imagine this country if criminal trials were based on assumptions & beliefs? The fact that you have a lawyer is a very good thing----nursing boards are VERY DIFFERENT when a nurse has an attorney with them. They have to be more careful than they would if there was no attorney present. Please make sure your attorney questions whoever is there from the IPN (or have the attorney request someone from IPN be at the board hearing) about the reason WHY you needed a second opinion when the first evaluation was good---and WHY you had to get the second opinion from "THEIR" addiction medicine doctor. Or why you had to have multiple drug screens/alcohol testing when several of them were negative. Plus, where you had to go to have the testing done----is it a facility that gets referrals from IPN?

I have a goal that I'd love to meet one day, and that is to prove that all the BON's and their "treatment programs" are nothing but schemes to make money for the state or whoever is involved in the entire scam. Sure, there are plenty of nurses that need help, but many nurses who have never taken a drug or don't have a drinking problem are being targeted and punished for something they didn't do. If one drug screen comes back negative, then that should be it. The nurse shouldn't have to go through test after test after test until something shows up. But, they wouldn't make enough money to justify being employed by the BON, so they "partner up" with places & order endless testing. Affinity is another one of those "money making" operations that are in cahoots with the state boards----it was just a matter of time before somebody saw big money in doing drug testing for licensed professionals.

It's all about money, and that is very sad.

[heynow1313]

I am reading your story with tears in my eyes. So much empathy. I am in the FL IPN as well. I can relate to so many of your fears, frustrations, and wonder, too, if your addictionologist was the same as mine. Could you PM me his (I'm thinking it's a man) name. I will report him if it is indeed the same person as I saw. The man should never practice again nor have any interaction with people whose career he holds over them with an iron fist. All the best to you now and always.

[NurseDiane]

There is a reason they come down on you like a ton of bricks & give you about 12 minutes to make a decision-----they know you're panicking & will take a better deal than going in front of the board. They do not give you time to do your research on websites like this & learn what others have gone through & get some information to possibly defend yourself. Yes, there are plenty of people whose lives have been saved by rehab & careers preserved by programs such as these---but there are also a lot of people who have been in a "catch 22" with them & had no way out unless they retained an attorney for $50,000. So, they just submit to whatever they're offered. The first thought is that they're going to lose their license, and the first thing out of the mouth of the program is "If you do this, you won't lose your license." None of the other conditions are stated, though---not the tremendous expense, not the multiple "evaluations" by their own providers, not the endless hoops you have to jump through to stay in the program & not get kicked out.

I know that no nurse will find this board & read through it in time before they have to agree with contract conditions or even before their "evaluation" with a mandated provider. But, in the very small chance that anybody does, the only thing I can recommend is that every single interaction with anyone----whether over the phone or in person---be recorded. Make sure you have a recorder going during your "evaluation"---there have been too many reports of evaluators saying one thing to a nurse during the evaluation & writing a completely different thing on paper, and the nurse has no recourse. At least with a recording of the evaluation session, a nurse can present it to an attorney & proceed with a fraudulent evaluation to a hearing. Record every telephone call with the people at the program. And get an independent evaluation even though the program won't accept it----you or your attorney can present it to the program/board.

The people that are holding your career & livelihood in their grubby hands know that most nurses won't retain attorneys to fight their case, and so they know they can manipulate the nurses very easily. Once a nurse signs that contract, there is no going back. I strongly suggest doing whatever you can do to retain an ATTORNEY with experience going before the BON---beg, borrow, steal the money to retain an attorney. I think that if you had an attorney, you never would have been mandated to an inpatient drug treatment program when you did not have any substance abuse issues. The sad thing is that a nurse can't file a lawsuit against a government entity because they are protected against litigation, & the BON knows this. So, they've got supreme power. And they know it.

[SororAKS, ADN, RN]

Absolutely have an attorney before dealing with any BON. Get your eval with an independent practitioner, whether the board accepts it differs state by state. Some will accept evals from any Board Certified Addictionist, MD/DO or NP. Most states will allow you to pick a practitioner that is outside their "loop" though. Before you sign or agree to anything, have this attorney look at it and give them copies. This goes for both monitoring programs and all dealings with the board. Talk to your attorney before talking to the BON. Nurses many times will say things that are against their self interest. Question everything and assume nothing.

[catsmeow1972, BSN, RN]

Like NurseDiane said above, I firmly believe that both the board and these programs take advantage of the fact that you are panicking and at that point are willing to do anything. Whether this is intentionally set up.this way or not, I am not sure. What I am sure of is that the BON, IPN and other such programs have entirely too much power and little to no accountability for the lives and careers that are ruined by the careless, treat'em all the same attitude that is evident. There is so much conflict of interest and lack of ethics that it is scary. I have always been warned that "the board is not your friend and does not have your best interest in mind". Well neither does IPN or any of these other programs. Essentially, they will leave you be so long as you keep funneling money to them. Very very pathetic and the very antithesis of what a nurse should be.

[NurseDiane]

Some of the most ridiculous things I've read with state monitoring programs is a graduate nurse who had a DUI 12 years prior to graduation stating that on the application to take the board exam, and being board ordered to go to inpatient rehab for 3 months & probation for 5 years. She was just being honest & got screwed because of that. The offense would not have been revealed on any criminal background search because it was over 10 years, so her honesty resulted in punishment from the nursing board. The moral of this story is lie until you are caught & can't lie anymore to circumnavigate the nursing boards. Never plead guilty until there is so much information against you that you can't possibly be found not guilty of the offense. The punishment is going to be the same whether you admit to it or not.

What really amazes me & infuriates me at the same time is that there is no oversight or regulation of the nursing boards from any higher authority, and these nursing boards are running amuck & doing whatever they want to do without any repercussions. They can't be sued because they are under the auspices of the state government, but are not run as state courts----they are run by "administrative" rules, which can be anything & there is no way to appeal their decisions. That is not right. The whole thing is nothing but a money-generating operation to the providers that hook up with the nursing boards. It really is disgusting.

[SororAKS, ADN, RN]

Funny that you said that Nurse Diane. I was just thinking about the role that the BONs serve in all this, and in the regulation of the healthcare system as a whole. The role that nurses play in all this. I have felt for a long time that the numbers of nurses that become ensnared in substance abuse are but a symptom of a larger systemic problem within healthcare. Instead of this being a call to look at the system itself, we have overzealous and unaccountable BON and other administrative bodies that do what they wish and many nurses that find themselves ensnared. I'm not saying that those with a bonafide illness that directly impacts their ability to provide safe care should not be accountable and should not be treated. What I am saying is that I find it odd that the larger systemic problems are not addressed adequately and government bodies are not accountable and can get as draconian as they wish.

[catsmeow1972, BSN, RN]

So my latest rant is regarding something that I knew was going to come up eventually. I threw my back out yesterday and could barely walk without screaming. Given that I do not have back problems to begin with, it was a reasonable assumption that it was just muscle spasms. I did the ibuprofen, heat/ice thing to no avail. Finally this afternoon I went to the urgent care place and got a script for prednisone and a muscle relaxer. I argued with myself for a while about even taking the muscle relaxer because "will I get in trouble with IPN" kept crossing my mind. Really? I am supposed to compromise my own medical care in deference to people that have never laid eyes on me and know nothing about me? Sorry, but screw that! i dropped an email to the case manager asking if i have to send her a copy of the script, just to CYA. It just toasts me that I am an adult and a competent medical professional and I have to clear stuff like this with these people. As for the crap about how I am supposed to notify all of my care providers that i am in IPN. I am calling BS on that too. For starters, if they are not prescribing anything controlled than it is irrelevant and two, I am pretty sure the PA at the urgent care clinic does'nt care to hear my entire stupid story. Being the adult, competent medical professional that i am, had she recommended something controlled I would have declined, but not because of IPN, but because while i hurt, it wasn't bad enough to need anything like that.

I am just feeling rather resentful about the control that IPN has over my life even in regards to parts of my life that have NOTHING to do with nursing. I've said it before, I am sure there are people that credit this for keeping them sober and so forth, but for those of us who just got trapped in the system, inappropriately, it is frustrating, anger inducing and stupid! Rant off....thank you.

[odaat]

I feel your pain! I just finally dragged myself out of a bad depression/anger/burning resentment for the complete invasion of privacy we're subjected to. They just really take things too far sometimes. Having to send in a report about my lady parts checkup or teeth cleaning just burns me up so bad. I don't even have the words for it. Having the monitoring program and the BON obtain all my medical records and be able to read about me finally opening up after 20 dang years about my childhood abuse..that's a violation I don't know that I'll ever really get over.