I'm in a Quandary

[Hooligan]

A little history...I am an RN and worked as an adult med/surg and pediatric nurse part-time for a little over 5 years. Almost 4 years ago, my hospital did a mandatory switch to 12 hour shifts and I was always a 3-11 girl since it worked out well for my family at the time. The kids were younger at the time, and one was just entering pre-school and working a 12 hour shift on either end was not conducive to our family life. My husband's job requires night time on-call once a month and he needs to be able to leave at any given time. We need a bit more stability and home front coverage than 12 hour shifts can provide.

At this same time though, as if by some divine intervention I was contacted by my local high school asking if I'd be interested in teaching Anatomy & Physiology and Medical Terminology for their Career and Technical Education program. I thought I was in heaven! No more weekends or holidays, summer break with my kids and if there was a snow day, no worries! I work in the same district they attend so absolutely no impromptu childcare needed. Everything sounded great!

The pay was not ideal, but I justified that thinking that I made about the same working part-time as a nurse as I would if I considered my summers off as part-time work and the pay schedule based on years of service and education would eventually "catch up" in the pay department. The thing is, our district has been experiencing budget cuts and I have only received one raise after my first year and I'm now finishing my 4th year of teaching and still only making what a 2nd year teacher would make. I have been assured that my position is safe and is not on the chopping block...unlike our unfortunate culinary teacher who has been cut and will not be returning next year.

What I did not anticipate was the sheer overload of after school work during the school year! My God! I had no idea how much uncompensated, extra work teachers do at home in addition to what they do in the classroom! I never cried in nursing...this job brought me to tears from just utter exhaustion and the transition from nursing to teaching was rough. When I got to the school, there was no program in place and I was making everything from scratch. Hours upon hours of making PowerPoints, work sheets, and studying. I had to relearn in great detail a lot of the A&P I hadn't reviewed since nursing school so that I could effectively teach the material in a way that high school students could understand. Needless to say, much of that has improved and I am a very good teacher. My frustration comes from being so sorely underpaid for the amount of BS I have to do. Also, if the current referendum doesn't pass for extra funding to pay the teachers, I'm looking at not getting a raise in the near future.

My students are driving me crazy as well...perhaps it's just this year, but I feel as though the kids are getting worse and worse. They have no drive, don't want to study, and can't manage to stay off their frickin' cell phones and are not punished adequately for using them. They are becoming increasing disrespectful and argumentative and again, for the pay, I question if it's all worth it?!? It's not just me either...all of the teachers are complaining about the students and about how this particular group is just awful but according to the middle school, the next group is going to be worse! Don't get me wrong, the kids aren't juvenile delinquents or anything, but they are coddled in a way like I have never experienced before. They are not disciplined at home or at school and it is apparent by their unwillingness to do their work. They expect you just to crank open their skulls and pour the knowledge in like soup from a can. I have a handful of students who I'm very fond of and I feel as though I would be letting those kids down, but bottom line I have to do what is best for myself and my family. The problem is though, that I'm not sure what "the best" really is.

To further complicate things, I was recently diagnosed with temporal lobe epilepsy and was unable to drive for several months. During this time, the school librarian picked me up every day and drove me to work. I work with great people, and I live only about 5 miles from the school and the school is a pretty small school with a small-town feel, which I love. If I went back to nursing, what happens if I have another seizure and can't drive again? This situation only complicates things. On the plus side, my own children will attend high school there and I like knowing that I'm part of the community and making a difference on that level. I like seeing my students at the store, and get a kick out of seeing them at their after school jobs when my family and I are out. The overall scheduling works well for the family, but the day to day demands of the job are taking a toll. I used to be the mom who would plan special birthday parties for my girls, sew their Halloween costumes, and make their lunches. I haven't attended a field trip or been able to be room-mom or do any of the things I want to do for my own kids. With nursing I was able to do that. Granted, I missed out on every other Holiday and missed out on every other summer weekend which worked when they were small and didn't realize that Santa came on a certain day. I just honestly don't know what to do. I also find that I get resentful towards my students when they complain about doing activities for class that I took time away from my family to create/plan for them! Ugh...I just don't know...I do feel though that I need to make a decision soon. I've been off the floor for 4 years, and each year I stay away, I lose my marketability in the nursing field. I have thought about going back to nursing part time and taking an online FNP program through Simmons College and just moving on in nursing, but then I just keep thinking, what if I regret leaving the teaching gig...maybe it's just a bad year...maybe things will get better...

My husband is no help whatsoever. He is supportive of whatever decision I make God bless him! He would welcome more pay, of course, but bottom line, he just wants me to be happy. Unfortunately, the only time I'm happy is during the summer when I'm spending time with my kids. I hate the hustle and bustle of the school year and I feel like I miss out on so much! I feel like I had a better work-life balance in nursing even if the scheduling was erratic.

I feel as though I have gone from one marginalized career into the next. What's next?...Social work? Anyway, I realize this post is just one long pity post...so I apologize for that...but does anybody have any thoughts?

[lovinglife2015]

Get yourself into a better school system or private school. The kids are still annoying, but less so.

[VANurse2010]

Just quit then. If you hate the job, but you keep doing it then your decision is made. And using terms like "they have no drive" is a generalization and devalues any point you are trying to make. And "unpaid" time...Are you in the classroom 40 hours a week? Being a teacher isn't just when you are standing in front of a classroom.

The bottom line is if you are miserable then quit. What exactly do you want people to say? You talk about God in your pos...well maybe be appreciative of every single day and appreciate the fact that you are not living in poverty and have clean water and food and a roof over your head. All your complaints are things that only you can change. No one else. Make a decision then stop complaining and just do it.

O please. What a ridiculous reply. I don't consider clean water and a job something to be thankful for in a first world country. These should be rights, not something to praise a phantom in the sky for.

[blondy2061h, MSN, RN]

Is some of this perhaps normal end of the year burn out and you may find yourself feeling better in the fall? If you've already made the curriculum that part is behind you. And you can set expectations for what is acceptable behavior in your class. I'm guessing there are teachers they don't dare touch their cell phone in their classes.

[NurseSpeedy, ADN, LPN, RN]

I'm not sure what the need for nurses is in your area, but if there is a high need you may be able to get the schedule that you want for your family...there's a catch. You will not be staff for the facility, you won't have guaranteed hours, but you could work per diem with an agency and pretty much chose when and where you are willing to work. Many do not have benefits, but if you can get healthcare through your spouse it may be worth it. I don't know how quickly you can jump back into a full patient load after being out of the field for years, but if you are able to do it this would be an option. When I did this, there was a demand in the winter and a slow period in the summer so if you worked it out right, save up in the winter and take the summers off with your family if you want.

Another option is in house flex-pool. Once again, no benefits but a higher pay rate. Better option if you cannot just jump right into short staffed situations after being out of the setting for a few years. Many base the rate on a tier of what your availability is, being willing to work every other weekend usually makes a lot more per hour.

Good luck with whatever you choose to do. Staying in a job that makes you miserable isn't good for you or your family, regardless of the schedule.

[Farawyn]

Get yourself into a better school system or private school. The kids are still annoying, but less so.

Really? What makes you say that? Kids are kids.

[Jules A, MSN]

Seems like your kids are your priority. You have summers, weekends, and school holidays to be with them.

That's priceless.

To me being able to feed, house and clothe said kids would be priceless.

[HouTx, BSN, MSN, EdD]

Have you thought about nursing jobs in settings that do not have 12 hour shifts? Home care jobs can be very 'family friendly' since there is usually more flexibility than inpatient settings. Many LTCs and LTACs still have 8 hour shifts. I wouldn't recommend physician offices, because they often have unpredictable hours during the week to accommodate patient demand. A PRN job would also provide flexibility for you, but most organizations won't consider hiring anyone as PRN unless they have recent experience.

I definitely understand your issues with K-12 teaching jobs. I come from a family chock-full of educators. Most are happily ensconced in higher ed... and view the K-12 world as something between involuntary servitude and the seventh circle of H***.

[llg, PhD, RN]

One thing about teaching to consider: If you play your cards right, it can get easier after the first 2 or 3 years. Let's face it, A&P doesn't change much from year to year. Once you have your classes developed, PowerPoints, class activities and projects, etc. -- you can use most of the same material from year to year.

My sister taught 2nd grade for many years. After the first couple of years, she had this amazing file cabinet with all her stuff in it -- every lesson plan for the whole school year, filed by week of the school. All she had to do for the next 25 years was tweak it a bit and update a few things every year. She taught me to do that. Now I teach a nursing course at local university. The first year was incredible busy ... the 2nd year was a little better because I knew what I was doing. After that, my only stress comes when I have to grade all their term papers at the end of the semester -- and deal with the people unhappy with their grades.

If you are not working this summer, use the time to organize all your course materials and fill in any holes that need filled in. That will make the school year a lot easier.

Also ...don't forget to consider the value of your benefit package as a teacher. I don't know what your benefits are, but a lot of teachers get great benefits that can "make up for" the low pay if you use those benefits.

If you really hate teaching, then quit. But consider my suggestions first. They may help you make your current job more palatable.

[NurseGirl525, ASN, RN]

You are trading one thing for another in each position. I'm just wondering why you couldn't request the one night off at your other job when your husband was on call? Every, single job in the world has it's pros and cons. Every one. To me those who can teach are awesome people. I don't have the patience for that kind of work. I have teachers say to me how they could never do nursing and how they have a great respect for nurses because they could take the blood and bodily fluids.

Only you can decide what is right for you and your family. Did you not research what teaching was before getting into it? The pay is terrible and it's not just classroom time. Those papers have to get graded somehow. And I can remember when I was in high school over 20 years ago teachers saying how we were the terrible generation with no respect. It's honestly just getting older I think and having a new perspectives on life. But if you can reach those 3 or 4 kids each year and have them love your subject, it's worth it. Not every student is going to love your subject and be enthralled with it. I hated literature, algebra, physics. I sat in the back and passed notes to my friends. I'm sure my teachers were not impressed with me and I didn't care. Now, I care about my grades. At 16, I did not.

Nursing and teaching are both noble professions. You have to do what won't make you miserable.

[lovinglife2015]

@FarawynRN

Having worked with diverse groups, I can honestly say that some groups of kids are worse than others. It really depends on the discipline received in the home, but I've observed that kids raised in urban school systems are more likely to be hellions, lacking home training. All kids get into trouble, but the lack of respect for authority is more prevalent in certain communities.

[Farawyn]

@FarawynRN

Having worked with diverse groups, I can honestly say that some groups of kids are worse than others. It really depends on the discipline received in the home, but I've observed that kids raised in urban school systems are more likely to be hellions, lacking home training. All kids get into trouble, but the lack of respect for authority is more prevalent in certain communities.

I've worked diverse groups as well, and actually see worse behavior from the "entitled" kids. That's been my experience.

[lovinglife2015]

I've worked diverse groups as well, and actually see worse behavior from the "entitled" kids. That's been my experience.

Define "worse." I have yet to see suburban school kids cuss out and abuse teachers the way that I've seen urban school kids do and often get away with because no one has the 'balls' to hold them accountable for their actions.