If you could speak your mind...

[GSDlvrRN]

There are situations that arise at work when I respond professionally, but there is often things running through my head that I want to say but I don't. I'm only thinking it! I want to start this thread to express some things that I wanted to say at work, whether it be to a patient, doctor, visitor, or other person. Some of the things are funny and some are passionate! Please share :)

I am a new nurse on the unit, not familiar with the residents, and not familiar with their family members. The family members are also not familiar with me! A visitor that I have never seen in my life came up to me while I was passing medications to a patient and said: "How much did Mom eat today?"

What I wanted to say: "We don't have any patient here named Mom."

[Mhsrnbsn]

I work nights... I love when families call at 8pm and want to know what the patient ate that day, how they did in PT, and what did the doctors say...

I always tell them, especially in patients that at A+O "I can transfer the phone call to them and they can tell you" then they give the ever predictable "I don't want to bother them response"...

What I want to say "so you want to bother me at the beginning of my shift over non emergent info I do not even have readily available to me?" What I actually say "well sir/ma'am my shift starts at 7PM I honestly have no idea all the details of what happened during the day shift, if you want to know, in the future I suggest calling around 5 or 6pm so you can get a good re-cap of the day from the nurse that was actually there, or you can ask your mom/dad about the day. Unfortunately while I get a detailed report its more geared toward more important matters relating to their immediate state of health."

Another favorite "when will PT work with mom or dad? What time does the doctor round?" Again what I say, "I'm really sorry but I work the night shift, I know for certain they will not be here at all tonight, but you would have to call during day shift. Most of the time PT has a list and just work with whoever is ready when they are rounding from my understanding. As far as the doctors go it's highly variable and depends on their schedules, they have office hours, surgeries to perform, and multiple facilities to visit" What I'd love to say "I don't babysit PT and the doctors, I have a lot on my plate without worrying about learning their schedules too"

for the WebMD scholar patients that know the doctors/nurses jobs better than the actually credentialed people I always want to say "Is that so? Where did you get your medical/nursing degree? Ohhhh you're a school teacher, police officer, cashier, etc...? YOUR EXPERTISE ISNT NEEDED, PLEASE LET ME DO MY JOB"

For the patients that constantly ring for snacks drinks pain meds etc... While I know pain is real, and so is hunger and thirst... You can't ask me for it all at once?! Come on people! Would love to tell them "You do realize RN does not stand for refreshments and narcotics right?!"

some days I really wished I could just say what I feel I bet that's why I grind my teeth in my sleep.

[Mhsrnbsn]

I always fake concern and say "oh my gosh is the call bell broken?! I am so sorry you needed to come out here!" When they admit they never pressed it I use that as my opportunity to say "please use the call bell, there is protected health information in my nursing station that you're not priveledged to view or overhear. You wouldn't want the family next door to hear about how your family members fracture happened from a fall when drinking with an extremely high alcohol level. I know I may appear unbusy sitting at a computer but I am actually charting, and planning my care for ALL of my patients, interrupting my train of thought could be dangerous"

[Neuro_I_C_U_Nurse]

Patient came back from aneurysm repair and there are 20 family members in the room, plus a dog that looks like an ewok. The family member tells me that the patient is comforted by their presence in the room. #1 I have to keep her BP in certain parameters and you are stimulating her by your presence. I did let 2 of the family members in the room, but the Ewok dog had to leave. #2 The patient needs a quiet environment, answer your cell phone out in the waiting room. #3 when the patient has a severe headache, I don't think she cares as much about how your day went. #4 Do NOT turn on the TV as loud as it will go -I asked that family member to wait in the waiting room.

[Angelicpurl]

Reminded me of many years ago, I was new grad. I had a post-hysterectomy patient come back from PACU. She had a wash basin for vomiting. This was before Zofran was used....

Family had piled in so much that the PACU nurse had to have some of them vacate to put the patient's bed back in her room! They had a stack of about 8 or 10 pizzas from the local pizza place. The room reeked....

I followed them all back in where PACU nurse was holding back her hair. Between heaves, she screeched out to an older woman there, get them all out! Take your **** pizza with you!

They all bolted with pizza to the waiting area. I assessed patient and got her meds. When I came back, she said to not let anyone back!

I had a post colon surgery patient who had NG tube and colostomy. Family demanded we get patient a cheeseburger, fries, and large diet Coke immediately. It was 12 am. The patient was heavily sedated from surgery. When he came around, family was eating & I heard plates hitting the floor. They'd put several plates on his bedside table while standing over him eating! When he was coming around, he slung the bedside table aside so hard it hit the wall by his bed. We went running in and he growled, get these MF out! (He said words). The others on my team escorted them out and called for housekeeping. The family was saying he was just "hangry" and needs food. I talked to him and he said, they disrespected him and us. They wanted all of us off his care, but he told the supervisor if she made him take new nurses before day shift, she better come care for him herself, so we better be back the next night if we were scheduled. We all were and she made sure we had him too.

[rubynrse, ADN, RN]

Doesn't matter who said what when, but I would love my answers to be:

"Shut up"

"No"

"Go away, let me do my job"

"You do it"

"Are you stupid?"

"I give up"

"What's the matter with you?"

"Speak English"

"Never mind, do what you want - you will anyway"

"Bye"

[dec2007]

My thought is that this all relates back to our "customer service" model of patient care, and the family has been lead to believe the nurses are essentially random waitresses.

[SororAKS, ADN, RN]

"No".

[Ruby Vee, BSN]

"No".

Well, you got your five characters in, but I fail to see why you bothered. To whom are you responding?

[SororAKS, ADN, RN]

I responded with "No" because that is an underutilized word with nurses. I didn't include much context. My bad.

[rubynrse, ADN, RN]

I got it right awaySororAKS, ADN, RN. That word sums it up. Says it all. It IS a complete sentence within itself.

[Rexie]

When pt's elderly mother was complaining about her ex-daughter-in-law, I just nodded and made sympathetic noises. I bit my tongue hard instead of saying: "Lady, your son is a drunk who you've enabled. He is an entitled, needy pain in my backside who calls my manager whenever he doesn't get what he wants (narcotics) whenever he wants them (frequently). No, I do not blame your ex-daughter-in-law one bit. I don't know how anyone (including you) puts up with him."

Ahhhh. I feel better now...

[ComeTogether, LPN]

What makes me silently crying inside is denial. Total, irreversible, persistent and cold as a stone denial. I am pretty sure that it is not "belief" or "hope".

Its a coping/defense mechanism, and there is no reasoning with this kind of denial. So sad.