If I have to leave?

[guest464345]

My parent in another state has become ill with COVID- or flulike symptoms (100F temp the first day with chills, then overwhelming fatigue, a little diarrhea, dyspnea with any activity, severe joint pain and body aches).  SpO2 is holding up so far. Test results take several days where they live.  They are in their 70's and both with other health risks.  No other immediate family there, and their friends have other significant comorbidities and are not going to be able to help.  The well parent is trying to care for the sick parent - barely holding on, and not going to manage if anything gets worse or if the illness drags on for several weeks (or if they both end up sick, or god forbid someone is hospitalized).

I am wondering if I'm going to have to go there, and maybe on short notice, and possibly for weeks.  But it's my first year in a new district which I think means I don't even qualify for FMLA, I don't have any leave saved up, and they don't really know me.  Do I....try to ask for an unpaid leave?  I think CARES act would cover two weeks at partial pay?  Though  I'm embarrassed to say, I don't even know if that act covers schools as employers.

We can live on my spouse's income, I'll be OK with money, but I'm not sure how to start this conversation at work (talk to HR? the principal?). 

I'm pretty sure there's not a line of people out front waiting to take my underpaid job in a school as we prepare to re-open during a pandemic....hopefully they will work with me.  If anyone has ideas about how to proceed, I'd appreciate them.



 

[ruby_jane, BSN, RN]

That's a lot.  Please breathe deeply.

My mom got sick in the Spring (NOT COVID - sepsis!) and they would not let me into the hospital. So first, find out if hospitalized, can you even be there?

Well parent needs to remain in daily contact with sick parent's provider...even though we're being told that most of us will weather COVID at home, there may be more things that the sick parent's doc can do. If they don't share a provider, well parent needs to talk to their provider, too. 

If this was me...I would let my HR know. And my boss. Just in case. You're right. Nobody's coming to back you up - BUT if you give your nursing director notice maybe they can magic something up.

Breathe deeply.

Best of luck!

[NutmeggeRN, BSN]

FMLA is allowed for anyone. Sick leave is usually accumulated, in education often your bank is full (x1year plus accumulated if you are there longer) at the start of the year and the depletes as needed. Also ck w HR. Good luck!!

[k1p1ssk, BSN, RN]

If you need to leave to care for sick parents due to COVID, you would qualify for the Families First Coronavirus Response  Act (FFCRA). It's a national program. This should protect your position for I believe 3months (until Dec 31 of this year, I think)

https://www.dol.gov/agencies/whd/pandemic/ffcra-employee-paid-leave

[BettyGirard, BSN]

1 hour ago, NutmeggeRN said:

FMLA is allowed for anyone. 

Not true.   You have to qualify.    Y ou have to have worked at least both 1250 hours and twelve months.   In addition, your district has to be large enough that FMLA applies (50 or more employees within 75 miles).   Laflaca said she was in her first year.

[NutmeggeRN, BSN]

18 minutes ago, BettyGirard said:

Not true.   You have to qualify.    Y ou have to have worked at least both 1250 hours and twelve months.   In addition, your district has to be large enough that FMLA applies (50 or more employees within 75 miles).   Laflaca said she was in her first year.

Ohh I did not know that, thank you!

[guest464345]

You are all so wonderful!  Thank you!

He's had two negative COVID tests, both PCR, both in the first week of symptoms.  (I don't know....flu? Of course they didn't test for that, just got routed to a COVID drive thru). Accessing medical care in the rural area where they live is a challenge.  And getting information third-hand from a sick person and a stressed person, neither of whom want to worry their kids - well, you know how that goes. 

I will give a heads-up to HR and my principal.  I mean... it's my parents.  Ugh, breathing deeply @ruby_jane, and I hope your mom recovered.  I'll just have to figure it out.  2020 has been a real kick in the shorts, eh?

[k1p1ssk, BSN, RN]

11 hours ago, laflaca said:

You are all so wonderful!  Thank you!

He's had two negative COVID tests, both PCR, both in the first week of symptoms.  (I don't know....flu? Of course they didn't test for that, just got routed to a COVID drive thru). Accessing medical care in the rural area where they live is a challenge.  And getting information third-hand from a sick person and a stressed person, neither of whom want to worry their kids - well, you know how that goes. 

I will give a heads-up to HR and my principal.  I mean... it's my parents.  Ugh, breathing deeply @ruby_jane, and I hope your mom recovered.  I'll just have to figure it out.  2020 has been a real kick in the shorts, eh?

May they recover quickly! Good call on notifying your higher ups. 

[Orca, ADN, ASN, RN]

On ‎9‎/‎21‎/‎2020 at 7:32 AM, NutmeggeRN said:

FMLA is allowed for anyone.

This is not accurate. You must have been with your employer for at least one year to qualify for FMLA.

[llg, PhD, RN]

I certainly hope that this is just a little bump in the road for your parents -- and not a major event.

Once the immediate crisis is over, perhaps this incident will stimulate you and your parents to have that difficult conversation that most families avoid until they have no other choice.   The "what to do with Mom and Dad" as they become too old/frail to handle crises -- and eventually, everyday life -- by themselves. 

Can they locate suitable resources in their current home region?  Are you prepared to quit your job and move in permanently with them to take care of them?   etc.   When my mother was faced with that issue many years ago, she had to look her parents in the eye and tell them that if they expected to call her every time there was a problem, then they needed to move close to where she lived.   With a teenager still at home, Mom could not simply run off to where they lived for weeks at a time.   After some explorations of the options, they did decide to move where my parents lived -- and were very happy they did so.

Your family's decision may be different.   Your/their options may be different.   But this is not the last time you will get the news that something is wrong and your presence is requested for what could be an extended length of time.   Whatever you decide ... your family needs a long-term plan and not just a short-term response to a particular event.

Good luck!

[yaRNthrower, BSN, RN]

Hugs and good vibes that your parent starts to feel better real soon.

 

[Leader25, ASN, BSN, RN]

First of all ,I give you my prayers and wish you and your parents a fast recovery.I also had a parent ill in another state,it is heartbreaking.Try to find out before your get there what things you can do online to help or obtain help.We relied heavily on VNS,sent supplies of gloves and bootie ,PPE ,to  keep them safe during health visits,even having an extra gallon  of sanitizer handy in small pump bottles is a big help keeping everyone safe.Is there food/grocery  delivery service.,Had large amounts of bottled water delivered also.What car service is there,what do they need in the house to keep comfortable,meds,electric blanket,we kept a pulse oxymeter and stethscope,thermometer close by,from amazon ordered extra bed /chair pads washable & waterproof,plenty of garbage bags,large and small,disposible ,even a k cup coffee maker so no stove was involved.Our agency also included doctor visits,sw,religious support.Best to you,take unpaid leave ,be clear on your dates,keep work informed of any changes,remind them you will be returning,-you might have to pay the health ins premiums while you are  off the payroll- to remain covered,..The jitterbug phone and service with emergency button is a big help because they can actually speak to a person.....PM me if I can help answer questions in any way.