right now I am taking a biology course with lab. Lab is the part that I hate the most because often you have to work with students who appear to be very discriminatory against students based on how they look (subtle racism, I am a minority). Everyday, I don't often sit in the same seat, depending on the time I get to class, some students get there a bit earlier than me so folks rotate around a bit so I don't always have the same lab partners. And there are times where I've been just a few minutes late and had to sit with whatever seat was available
There is a Caucasion male who seems to despise me for absolutely no reason at all. The moment I walked into the classroom, he gave me this sneer and disliked me from the get go. i am a nice person, quiet, humble and I do not bother ANYBODY, so his dislike for me is totally unjustified. I can literally FEEL his dislike for me the few times I had to sit next to him. The vibes he send are so thick you could cut it with a knife. We are seated at a table and when I sat next to him, he turned his seat totally facing the other way
Anyway, once we had to work on lab together and he was giving me a hard time. Everytime I addressed or asked a question, he gave me attitude, was very self righteous and treated me like I was very incompetent. But when the other students in our group (who are non black) asked something he was very warm, nice and friendly. I was the recorder, so I wrote down all of the results from our experiment, and he acted as if I was too incompetent to do that. Before I could even let the ink hit the sheet of paper, he's already telling me I'm ABOUT to write it down wrong. At one point I felt like just leaving class
Then again today, all of the seats were filled and the closest seat was where he was sitting. This time he just got up and moved to a bunch of white students to do an experiment with them. The other students in our lab didn't really pay much attention but I know he did it because I was there.
I had this happen a few times with other students who don't like minorities. I had to sit next to some non black students and one of the male students did not seem very happy about that. I saw him cut his eyes off at me. He never spoke to me, never made eye contact and always addressed the other non black group members
I absolutely HATE lab, and wish I didn't need it. I cannot stand the discrimination. I wish we could just work ALONE so I won't have to go through this mess
"i am a nice person, quiet, humble and I do not bother ANYBODY"
Some people may take you being quiet as you not wanting to be there or that you are too good to speak them. Trust me I've been there. I used to be very quiet and people assumed the worst of me because I didn't give them the opportunity to know who I am. That said, life's too short to be concerened by a few people being Jerks to you. I say you try smiling and saying hi a few times and if you get the same attitude then screw them. You'll never have to see them again after this class. You are focusing so much of your time and energy on them that you may end up missing out on learning what you need to in the class-which will only interfere with your learning or your grade. I agree though, that you should try and get there early if not on time.
Good luck and keep your focus on your ultimate goa...being a NURSE:wink2:
i am a minority. and i went to an all white high school. there was 5 black students that graduated in my class alone. so im use to people being racist towards me. and this might be where you and i differ..but id say something. id completely confront them. id let them know how i felt about the situation and what i dont like..and from there. id "feed him with a long handle spoon" do you know what that means. im sure you do..if not..ask me =) just blow it off from there..but i wouldnt let him talk to me like im dumb and didnt have a place in the class. so thats just me. say something.. and let it go..those types of people.. you just have to pray for.
This really may not be about you being black. Now maybe this doesn't apply in your case, but here's what happened with me.
I'm white, and there was a girl in my lab (also white) who was always late and disorganized. After the second time I was paired with her, and spent most of lab explaining what she should have read before coming to lab, I did everything I could to avoid being paired with her again.
Anyway, just do your best, and don't let someone else's actions bother you too much. You really can't know what's going on with everybody all the time.
You can't know for sure if it's the color of your skin. People are weird in different ways. He might not like your perfume for example. If you want to be a nurse that should be all that matters. Assert yourself and learn for yourself. The next time he's rude to you it's okay to tell him that you do not like to be spoken to like that. He is going to have a very hard time, if indeed, racist working as a nurse. He better get over that pretty quickly or it's going to be a miserable life for him!
You can't be absolutely sure he's a racist so don't assume. I had a similar experience to yours back in the early '70's, not that long after the Civil Rights Era. I am Caucasian and our lab group happened to be mostly African American. We all got along great, were friends, did things together -- except for one man. He made subtle little digs at the other Caucasians but was exceptionally rude, obnoxious and just plain mean to me for no reason that I could discern. When I could stand it no longer, a man in the group took him aside for a talk. Guess what? I wore the same cologne that his sister who had recently died of leukemia had worn and he admitted to my friend that part of him felt I "had no right to wear his sister's scent." Logical? Nope. Understandable? Totally and completely.
I'm with those posters that said it may have nothing to do with race, but everything to do with your perfume or being late or a myriad of other reasons. Not everything is about race.
No everything is not about race, but please don't minimize how she feels with that statement. Racism totally exists even in 2009, but everyone wants to sweep things under the rug. I'm not saying he is or not a racist, but that is how she feels. There may be a number of reasons he is acting like some insecure idiot, and his actions make her feel that way. Address him directly and discreetly, but do not let his ignorance deter you from your ultimate goal.....success
No everything is not about race, but please don't minimize how she feels with that statement. Racism totally exists even in 2009, but everyone wants to sweep things under the rug. I'm not saying he is or not a racist, but that is how she feels. There may be a number of reasons he is acting like some insecure idiot, and his actions make her feel that way. Address him directly and discreetly, but do not let his ignorance deter you from your ultimate goal.....success
No one was "minimizing" how she feels, but simply pointing out that she doesn't know for sure that his attitude is racially motivated. Simply because she FEELS he's a racist does not in fact make him one....in fact it could be said that makes her one.
someone who is not racist does not have to say their racist. you can always feel it negative vibes in the air. i work at a hospital and you just know when someone prefers not to be friendly with you because of the color of your skin, you can feel the negative energy very easily ,but at the end of the day she just needs not to care. regardless if he racist, or just doesnt like her.
someone who is not racist does not have to say their racist. you can always feel it negative vibes in the air. i work at a hospital and you just know when someone prefers not to be friendly with you because of the color of your skin, but at the end of the day she just needs not to care. regardless if he racist, or just didnt like her.
"i work at a hospital and you just know when someone prefers not to be friendly with you because of the color of your skin"
This is the most ridiculous thing I have read on this site yet, if someone is not friendly?? You must think everyone is racist then, the guy who cuts you off on the road, someone who doesnt say hello back to you....time to put in check the race card once awhile...does it happen, yes, can minorities be just as racist as whites, of course....I think she needs to sum it up to him being a jerk and move on.
of course if someone is not being friendly their not racist. There is something you can feel it, or maybe i can just feel it because i been working with so many different kinds of people for so long. its not easy to brush off when you experience all the time.
rayele
48 Posts
"i am a nice person, quiet, humble and I do not bother ANYBODY"
Some people may take you being quiet as you not wanting to be there or that you are too good to speak them. Trust me I've been there. I used to be very quiet and people assumed the worst of me because I didn't give them the opportunity to know who I am. That said, life's too short to be concerened by a few people being Jerks to you. I say you try smiling and saying hi a few times and if you get the same attitude then screw them. You'll never have to see them again after this class. You are focusing so much of your time and energy on them that you may end up missing out on learning what you need to in the class-which will only interfere with your learning or your grade. I agree though, that you should try and get there early if not on time.
Good luck and keep your focus on your ultimate goa...being a NURSE:wink2: