I am sorry

[patrick1rn]

I have seen it in these blogs so many times. Saying sorry for something that you have no controll over

I grew believing you said sorry when you had remorse for something wrong that you have done. Which means you accept blame for something bad that has happened.

I am not sorry for something that I did not do. Maybe people use the term as a sentiment. I dont.

At work, I dont say I am sorry for something that I have no control over. Never.

If a person is lost in the hospital and I have a second to redirect them, I do it, I dont say sorry.

If a family member is upset with a nurse, usually because of conflict with personality mind you, I dont say sorry for the attitude of the nurse.

One time a family thought they could make me get them some coffee. No, I told them, I am not here to make and serve coffee to family members. I didnt say sorry then either.

What are your thoughts ?

[FireStarterRN, BSN, RN]

"as for family members making coffee, well i just direct them to the tea room where they can do it themselves. i didn't study nursing for 3 years and end up with debt just to make coffee."

ouch! because cleaning up vommit, stool and urine is so much more glamorous?

:rotfl::lol_hitti:yeahthat:

[nursemike, ASN, RN]

When my Dad was in the hospital, last summer, he had a couple of nurses he was crazy about, and several he thought were good enough, and a couple he never wants to have again. Consistently, I could tell which were which by how they treated me when I visited. Certainly, as a nurse, I don't expect to be waited upon, but it appears courtesy and compassion go hand in hand.

[ToxicShock]

If you don't say "sorry" when someone dies, what DO you say?

Person: My Mom just died and I feel awful.

You: ..............

Really? :smackingf

[FireStarterRN, BSN, RN]

If you don't say "sorry" when someone dies, what DO you say?

Person: My Mom just died and I feel awful.

You: ..............

Really? :smackingf

How about "I'm here for you in a professional capacity, and I'll even show you where you can buy coffee" ?

[flightnurse2b, LPN]

i don't care how much education i have, if i ever have a problem telling a patient that i'm sorry, even if i am not the cause of their problem, then i need to take a break from nursing.

saying "i'm sorry" is a my way of saying "no, i don't understand what you are feeling right now, but i am sorry you feel that way".

and i would have no problem getting a family a cup of coffee or showing them where the coffee pot is. esp in an acute care setting where some family members spend many nights away from home, have been awake for hours with anxiety, etc.... it's a nice gesture. when i used to work in the ED, we would make sure that the coffee in the waiting room esp the private waiting room, was always fresh for those that need it. it's the little things sometimes that make a lasting impression.

[leslie :-D]

i try to be gracious at all times.

granted, i work with the dying and their families, where extra tlc is warranted.

but i also like to think that all these visitors, are guests in my home...

and i try to be the hostess with the mostest.

now, when they come to expect it of me, my 'mostest' takes a sudden nosedive.:)

leslie

[jnette, ASN, EMT-I]

I will also use the phrase 'I'm sorry' as a way to express empathy. Meaning that I feel bad for the person about the situation or the event they have experienced; and, not necessarily that I had anything to to with it. It is sort of like saying I am so sorry about the death of your ... It no way implies that I taking any responsibility for the death.

I agree.. i do this as well. And I also think it's a geographical thing.. I never used to say "Im sorry" in this context until moving to this area of the country, where it is a very common way to express empathy. :)

[leslie :-D]

I agree.. i do this as well. And I also think it's a geographical thing.. I never used to say "Im sorry" in this context until moving to this area of the country, where it is a very common way to express empathy. :)

so what did you say when someone died, if not, "i'm sorry"?

wow, that sucks???

leslie

[island40]

I never say "I'm sorry." Sorry is a feeling. I have often said, "I appologize for you inconvenience" and then tried to correct the situation. As a consumer I couldn't care less what the person is feeling; I want them to fix it right now. I have had supervisors tell me to say 'I'm sorry' as a hospital policy for public relations. It is believed that many people just want an appology. I don't agree with that. I do provide therapeutic communication by saying, "Your sound angry/frustrated/upset. Is there something that I can do to help you?" An insinsere "I'm sorry" is adding insult to injury in my opinion.

[1TachyRN, RN]

Tonight I made a pot of coffee for a patient.

And I'm not sorry I did it.

[patrick1rn, MSN, RN, NP]

i try to be gracious at all times.

granted, i work with the dying and their families, where extra tlc is warranted.

but i also like to think that all these visitors, are guests in my home...

and i try to be the hostess with the mostest.

now, when they come to expect it of me, my 'mostest' takes a sudden nosedive.:)

leslie

I bet your kindness is appreciated, but then again, when you equate being a RN as with a hostess, the profession suffers.

[patrick1rn, MSN, RN, NP]

Tonight I made a pot of coffee for a patient.

And I'm not sorry I did it.

I am sorry that you did ! I have no problem getting a patient a cup of coffee if there is some coffee already made. I m not uncaring, but I dont serve coffee to family members, and if patients feel like it is my job to make them coffee, I explain to them it is not. We have snacks for patients at the nurses station, that is a part of my job I do it. As far as vomit, feces and urine, that is a part of my job as well. But I am not a waiter. I wouldnt expect a waiter in a restuarant to change a babys diaper would you ?