I am not proud of my track record.

Nurses General Nursing

Published

Where do begin? :( I have been an LPN for 1 year in 2 months and unfortunately during this period I have had 5! nursing jobs. yes 5.

(1) I started off in a nursing home, just to find my niche I didn't like it but I needed a form of income and I needed some experience in the field. Two months in the DON called me and said, he thinks that its best that he let me go. He didn't give me a specific reason, but during my orientation the nurses that trained me had to evaluate how I was doing, so I assumed that did not do well during orientation. Like I said, I did not like the nursing home, I had 30-32 patients to care for and I just did not feel safe nor happy.

(2) My second job was in a pediatric home health, I was working for a family and one of the orders called for me to put cotton ball in the little boy's ears as he had surgery 2 days before. Well, I did put cotton ball in my patient ear but I had soaked and drained it with H.Peroxide. Well, the next day the family called the agency and said I put a wet cotton ball in the boys ears. The order stated for me to cleaned around the boy's ear with a cotton tip and H.peroxide and then placed a cotton ball in his ear. My mistake was I misunderstood what the outgoing nurse was telling me before she left about the patient new orders. My fault. It was a med error and the agency said I cannot work for them unless I complete a med error CEU. I never completed it, so never went back to work for them. Although, 6 months later they were still calling me to come work for them because they need nurses so bad. I didn't the patients they assign me usually live 45-50 minutes away and I just couldn't put myself through that again.

(3) My third job was a nursing home again. This lasted a month and a few weeks. I mentioned that I do not like the nursing home. I don't. But my mom work in this particular nursing home and she gave told the DON about me. Well, since my mom has been there for 5 years and a good worker they hired me. Well, I had so much patient work load that I did not do my treatments, although I charted that I did. This led to me having a meeting with the DON and 4 other people in administration. I was so nervous at that meeting that I told myself that I never want to be in such a position again. I felt humiliated, embarrassed, and just incompetent as a nurse. I was first suspended, but then let go. They informed me that they would report me to the BON. well it's been 8 months, have not gotten anything from the BON and I've checked my license online and it says I'm in good standing no complaints.

(4) My fourth job was at a pediatric clinic. i did not like it much as I felt I was losing many of my skills. I mostly gave immunizations to babies and worked on the doctor's schedule for the week. I worked there for 4 months but then i had to leave due to the fact that I started an RN program and the schedule would conflict with my work schedule. The manager loved me, got great reviews from them. I still felt bad though due to my recent firing. My self esteem just plummeted and Im still feeling like somethings wrong with me. Anyways, I did not get fired from this job, I left due to school.

(5) I am currently working for 2 agencies. one is a pediatric agency and the other is a pediatric and adult agency. Well, yesterday I got fired from the pediatric agency. The reason is I document that I left at my scheduled time when in reality I left 30 minutes early three time. Did I think they would find out? yeah. Did I think it was an issue. I did. I literally cannot figure out any reason as to why I charted that I left at 0700 when in reality I left at 0630. At the other agency I work for, one of the parents always let me leave early and she said I can still write down the time I left as the time I was scheduled. in my head, I started to think it was no longer a big deal so i did it with this agency. I know in nursing school they teach us not to do this, I hate that I'm not abiding by the things that I was taught in school and letting others influence my judgement. I knew it was a big deal and I did it anyway. I'm sure the other nurses that work with the pediatric/adult agency leave early but chart their scheduled time cause the guardian (mom) said its ok. Anyways, got called into the office today and I was let go. It is considered insurance fraud. in total I lied and said I worked 1 hour and 30 minutes. The DON were saying that the insurance company might not think its a big deal they might just say "oh, its only 1 hour and let it go. they do not think that I was trying to be malicious. but they have to report it to the BON. Two of the times I left, the patient had an appointment in the morning so he had to leave at 0530 but I charted that I left at 0600. the other time I left early is when I emailed the agency saying that I can now work 12 hours form 7pm-7am. well it wasn't suppose to start that particular week, but the following cause I have nursing clinical in the morning. Hence I left at 0630 but charted i left at 7. The DON was saying it all depends on how the BON choose to handle it.

I do not know what's wrong with me. I've never been fired before until I started nursing. I'm a few months from graduating an RN program and I still cannot get my act together. I want to treat this as a lesson learned. I'm feeling stupid cause I've been fired so many times. I'm still working for the pediatric/adult agency but I am going to chart the correct time that I leave, at the end of the day the I have to protect my license no one else. Does anyone know how long it will take for the BON to contact me? will they make a big deal over 1 hour and 30 minutes? My first year of nursing was rough. I take full responsibility. I am so embarrassed that I created another account to write this although my other account is not even lay real name. I need to remember all the handwork I put in into obtaining my license and not let it go so easily. What's wrong with me? I just do not think that I am learning from my mistakes as a normal human being would.

STARL: First, you absolutely need an attorney for both license defense before the BON and for any forthcoming additional criminal charges. The TAANA in fact lists 5 that are nurse attorneys (hold dual degrees) and 17 that are attorneys specializing in medical/nursing legal issues.

Second, for clarification, one of the reasons people are saying that you haven't seemed to listen to any advice etc is because you are asking about still working as a nurse while under investigation and that you are concerned about graduating. The point of the majority of the 17 pages of comments was not to degrade you but to strongly emphasize that you are in REAL trouble and it would be in your best interest to abstain from ANYTHING in the nursing profession until you get things straightened out. No one is making comments just to be mean or snarky....we all have a genuine concern for the path you've been traveling and for the welfare of your patients. That includes both your job and your school clinicals.

It's not easy just to quit my current home health job and drop out of school. what I have done is improved my nursing care with my current patient and signed up for my first counseling session.

Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
It's not easy just to quit my current home health job and drop out of school. what I have done is improved my nursing care with my current patient and signed up for my first counseling session.

Right now, you're not looking at "easy" or "not easy." You're in a very precarious position, both personally and professionally. Given the complaints against you already, what do you think will happen if you make an honest mistake and hurt someone? Perhaps this time it would BE an honest mistake -- we all make them. But given your track record, there is no room for forgiveness. You would lose your license, possibly permanently and may face criminal charges -- if you aren't already being looked at for criminal charges.

Quit your home health job -- it's not as if you haven't quit a few jobs already. Drop out of school. Why in the world would you want to continue nursing school when there is so much doubt that you'll be able to get or keep a license? Find a job away from health care while your attorney looks into this. You live with your parents; I'm sure they're not going to let you starve. Improving your nursing care is great -- but who says it's improved? You? You don't seem like all that good of a judge. And more than your nursing care, your character is the problem.

Right now, I'm at a loss as to what job does not require honesty and integrity, but none require it so much as when you're entrusted with the care of a vulnerable human being.

To be honest, I'm so so depressed about the whole situation. I can't believe that after 1 year of nursing I am at risk of losing my license and the possibility of facing criminal charges. I have literally ruined my life.

Right now, you're not looking at "easy" or "not easy." You're in a very precarious position, both personally and professionally. Given the complaints against you already, what do you think will happen if you make an honest mistake and hurt someone? Perhaps this time it would BE an honest mistake -- we all make them. But given your track record, there is no room for forgiveness. You would lose your license, possibly permanently and may face criminal charges -- if you aren't already being looked at for criminal charges.

Quit your home health job -- it's not as if you haven't quit a few jobs already. Drop out of school. Why in the world would you want to continue nursing school when there is so much doubt that you'll be able to get or keep a license? Find a job away from health care while your attorney looks into this. You live with your parents; I'm sure they're not going to let you starve. Improving your nursing care is great -- but who says it's improved? You? You don't seem like all that good of a judge. And more than your nursing care, your character is the problem.

Right now, I'm at a loss as to what job does not require honesty and integrity, but none require it so much as when you're entrusted with the care of a vulnerable human being.

At this point, I wouldn't mind starving. :(

Specializes in nursing education.
At this point, I wouldn't mind starving. :(

STARL if you have truly had a change of heart that would be a wonderful thing. I am glad you have started counseling. Best wishes to you.

It really sounds like your inner self, your subconscious is telling you, that this is NOT the career for you. You have people's lives in your hands. I think you need to step back from nursing and seek some professional help. Was this a career path that was chosen for you through pressure from say, family? Friends? Why did you want to become a nurse? Did it just kind of "end up" there because of your mom? you need to ask yourself some soul searching question and answer them honestly. I wish you the best, for your sake and the sake of your possible future patients.

Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.
If you must know, early 20's (yes), still living with parents (yes), new nurse (yes). Just trying to better my life and learn from this.

What I don't get is that you are *just now* learning from this, now that you are in trouble with the BON. You didn't care about the patients you were hurting, the money you were stealing or your mom's reputation when you thought you were getting away with it.

Since you are still very young, I echo the sentiment of you quitting your job & school. That way you can focus on what the BON might do & yourself. You clearly need deep psychological help. The BON might decide your not mentally capable to practice as a nurse. Also, what many people have said, nursing might not be for you. Just because your mom (& whatever other family) is a nurse, doesn't mean you have to be.

Really? NPs working for free? Do you mean to say that you don't think you're being paid enough for what you do? Because I didn't start my FNP program to work for free. I think there is some merit to nursinggetaway's comments. Me thinks you have much to listen to yourselves. This is basically 17 pages of "you're a monster, you deserve everything you're gonna get!" Not all of it, I know there were some just giving advise. But I have seen the same in nurses. Most that I've worked with, met, are kinda burned out husks that used to be these altruistic, wanna save the world, I love what I do because I make a difference people. Now they worry more about the correct night differential. I'm not saying all nurses, but there has been a lot. I think it has more to do with the career and what it does to you, or the reality of it that makes us that way. I mean come on, everyone knows the saying "nurses eat their young." It said for a reason. Gosh this is way off topic. Well, I was just saying, I think she gets it. She doesn't need 17 pages of it. I think she needs help, legally, mentally, morally. I hope you get it all.

Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.
Really? NPs working for free? Do you mean to say that you don't think you're being paid enough for what you do? Because I didn't start my FNP program to work for free. I think there is some merit to nursinggetaway's comments. Me thinks you have much to listen to yourselves. This is basically 17 pages of "you're a monster, you deserve everything you're gonna get!" Not all of it, I know there were some just giving advise. But I have seen the same in nurses. Most that I've worked with, met, are kinda burned out husks that used to be these altruistic, wanna save the world, I love what I do because I make a difference people. Now they worry more about the correct night differential. I'm not saying all nurses, but there has been a lot. I think it has more to do with the career and what it does to you, or the reality of it that makes us that way. I mean come on, everyone knows the saying "nurses eat their young." It said for a reason. Gosh this is way off topic. Well, I was just saying, I think she gets it. She doesn't need 17 pages of it. I think she needs help, legally, mentally, morally. I hope you get it all.

Omg, NETY? I have NEVER experienced it. Not once. That is such an over used & useless phrase. When did she experience "NETY"? Never. Bullying isn't specific to nursing, it's everywhere & in every profession - blue collar & white.

Why do you think she has received 17+ pages of responses? Because what she did was horrendous & she is *just now*, that she has been contacted by the board, realizing what she did was wrong!

Also, when did she ever say she felt bad about the people she affected? Never, not once. It wasn't something small, like she documented something wrong or left something out. That is an accident. What she did was calculated, she knew what she was doing.

Because she was knowingly lying & stealing (which, by the way, is *illegal*) she does deserve everything that will happen to her. Because I guarantee, that if she didn't get reported to the BON, she would still be falsifying documents & lying on her time sheets.

I get that people can burn out, it happens. But how does the OP show any of that? Especially since she job hopped like a mad man & left a wake of destruction in her path. Not only that, but she has been a nurse for such a short time. How could she burn out that fast? If she did, obviously nursing isn't for her. But by her actions regardless, nursing is not the right job for her.

I do agree she needs professional help. But she needs to quit working & going to school so she can focus on herself. She will not change or get better if she continues on the same path she is on. Becoming an RN won't make anything easier, just harder.

And just because other nurses are knowingly lying or falsifying documentation, doesn't make it right, that just makes them bad nurses.

I went to the ER a short while ago. When I was getting ready to be discharged the NP came to talk to my mom & I. The NP said the nurse was going to listen to my baby (I'm pregnant) & then I would go. So the nurse (RN) comes in, unhooks me from everything & when my mom asks when she would listen to the baby the nurse stated she already did. Clearly a lie because she hadn't checked my baby when my mom or husband were there. I thought that was crappy. What if there was something wrong with my baby? Did she document that she listened to the baby? I don't know if she did, but that would not only be wrong, but illegal. If there was something wrong with my baby obviously that would've been a huge lawsuit.

So what the OP did affects more than just her. As a current nurse & a future FNP you should see that.

Finance, just as this thing is finally winding down and the OP says she's getting help, you come along with your burned out husk and nurses eat their young nonsense. The OP's dilemma has nothing whatsoever to do with other nurses. It is of her own making, not ours. It doesn't have anything to do with altruism or 'wanna save the world' either. I've been a nurse for almost 37 years, and I am still enthusiastic about what I do. I'm neither burned out nor a husk, and I don't "wanna" save the world. With the help of my coworkers I can save just one patient at a time, and that is a great privilege to have the knowledge, skill and experience to do so.

The very notion that there is bullying towards the OP, is absolutely absurd. The OP is only "sorry" due to getting caught and now more than likely going to lose their license. What was done, was done intentionally and without a second thought regarding the safety of the patients. It isn't like a simple mistake was made....falsifying treatment documents could have literally killed the patients. The followup attitude from the OP, as in poor me and so sick to their stomach, is bloody tacky. The OP is only sick, due to knowing the license will be pulled. There was plenty of time for taking a refresher or trying to prove to the BON that the OP was wanting to work harder to be a better nurse; but there wasn't, and only a sob story and asking for help. What the heck happened to accountability as a nurse and as a human being? Telling the OP to give up the license for the sake of the patients, is for the safety sake of the patients only. Have we become a society where a simple negative response brings about accusations of bullying? I certainly would not want the OP working on my family, friends, any member of this forum or anyone in general. Why, because the OP has proven that they cannot be an effective nurse and will illegally falsify documents when they are pressed for time. Unprofessional isn't the word for this, and I would reflect on jumping the gun on defending them, as it makes me question your own ability to be a nurse and what you would pull if you could get away with it.

Specializes in Med/Surge, Psych, LTC, Home Health.

STARL, I am going to have to agree with those who are saying, get away from nursing.

Look, you are very young. Very. It may not feel like it... Heck I felt like an old lady at 17!!... But you really are very very young. When I was your age, I wanted to be an artist for a living. I was also very immature. I found out, one day, that a career in art simply was not in the cards for me, for various reasons.

It may be time for you to kinda start over. Your life ISN'T over. Get you a job doing something different for a while, give yourself some more time to grow up, enjoy being a young person... Perhaps in the next couple of years, you will come up with a new plan, a new career path. It happened to me! Then you can go back to school.

You can do this. I don't know you from Adam, but it sounds so much like, when it comes to nursing.. You have dug a huge hole that you aren't going to dig out of.

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