I am a new nurse trying to figure out how to get a doctor to stop bullying me at work.

[Mississippideer]

I've been a nurse for just under a year. I'm being bullied at work by a doctor. I work in a cardiac ICU so we work collaboratively with our doctors toward the goal of good, safe patient care. There is one doctor who has begun to target me with his bully behavior. He yells and is disrespectful in the way he speaks to me both in private and in front of patients and coworkers. He makes comments to others that insinuate I am incompetent and don't do my job. I've had nothing but praise from other doctors, coworkers, even the house supervisor about my performance, knowledge, and professionalism. What can I do to stop this doctor from treating me this way. He has a reputation for doing this to most of the staff but I refuse to spend my career, which I love, being treated this way. Help!! All insight appreciated.

[Been there,done that, ASN, RN]

"even another dr has noticed and told me to write him up and stand my ground."

Write him up ..each and every time... was my answer.

CVT surgeons have, in my opinion, the biggest god complex of all doctors. When IAMGOD raises his voice to you, stand up on your tiptoes, look him straight in the eye and defend your actions.

A well run facility , will make him apologize, exactly where he verbally abused you.. for all to hear.

It is suhweet.

[NurseDiane]

Good luck on this one, fellow nurse.

NOTHING---and I mean NOTHING---will be done about this doctor because he brings in lots and lots and lots of revenue for the hospital, so he can behave however he wants to. Pulling him to the side to "talk to him" about how he treats you is a worthless endeavor. That will make it worse. What you say will go in one ear and out the other. I'm sure it's been tried before.

My advice to you is to let everything he says roll off your back. Don't take it personally. I am sure you're not the first nurse he has done this to, and won't be the last. You are a new nurse, and a perfect target for his bitter, frustrated, angry & unhappy behavior. I am also sure the hospital is well aware of his behavior, so you don't have to worry about losing your job. His action of telling your boss that he has a "beef" with anesthesia is a very good indicator of his poor interpersonal relationship abilities with co-workers. Using you as his "middle man" to passive-aggressively handle his "beef" with anesthesia shows that he is really just a coward who can't fight his own battles. If he wants his patient on bi-pap, order it----don't expect another service to order what you want. Clearly anesthesia did what they wanted anyway, and it pissed him off even more. So, you're not the only one he's abusing----the thing is, he can't bully his co-physicians because they'll tell him to f*** off and die, so he sets his sights on those who won't tell him that. That's what cowards do. They don't pick on somebody their own size.

Don't let him get to you. In my experiences, cardiothoracic surgeons have a tendency to be short fused, yell a lot, target nurses & behave like little children. In many cases, their personal life is in shambles & this is how they deal with it. They spent their entire "formative years" buried in books and did not learn the social skills necessary to play nice in the sand box. Chances are, he has few--if any---friends, his wife (if not his ex-wife) hates him, his kids hate him, his neighbors hate him, etc., and he knows it.

Another thing is----DOCUMENT, DOCUMENT, DOCUMENT!!! Document that the CT surgeon instructed you to call anesthesia, what anesthesia's interventions were, the the CT surgeon was not happy with the pain med orders & wanted the patient on bi-pap, etc.

I worked in a major NYC teaching hospital where the chief cardiothroacic surgeon was a WILD MAN. He would walk into the O.R. & turn on heavy metal music as loud as it would go & nobody could hear anything in the O.R., he wore these wooden clogs covered in blood with the rubber soles worn off so you could hear him clop-clopping half a mile away. He would walk into the CT PACU like a hurricane, yell at everybody, and go into the CT break room with the residents & fellows to eat. He had the bedside manner of a terrorist and would always have the CT fellows do the explanations to the patients pre-operatively & see the patients post-op in his office. The guy was a social disaster. But, do you know what? I'd let him put a scalpel to my chest any day of the week because he was an EXCELLENT---and I mean EXCELLENT---CT surgeon. Other cardiac docs in NYC and surrounding areas would send him their sickest hearts and sick pediatric hearts. I ended up finding out that his 45 year old wife had severe M.S. and was not expected to live for much longer---she walked with a walker, had garbled speech & was getting worse by the day----so his personal life was extremely stressful.

One thing I can also say is that I used to see the nicest residents/fellows come in from the mid-west and others places, and over the course of a year or two, they also turned into stressed out, exhausted, social misfits too.

[NurseDiane]

I re-read the episode you described. And I stick to my initial opinion of letting it roll off your back because the hospital is not going to do anything about it since he generates lots and lots and lots of money for the hospital, that his behavior is probably very well known to the managers in the hospital----and that you're not the first one he's done this to, and you won't be the last.

I think how I would have handled that situation would have been to "remind" him that you do not write orders---physicians do that. Your job is to carry out the orders that the physician writes. I would have told him that if he has a problem with the orders the MDA wrote, that he should discuss it with the MDA--not you.

I have found that if I stood strong and stood my ground with physicians that were idiots, the verbal abuse waned and eventually stopped. You have to realize that he---just like any other bully--wants to get a rise out of you. They want a response as validation that their bullying is scaring you. If you don't give it to them, their interest dissipates and they move onto someone else. I'm not saying that's the right thing for them to do, but eventually they'll leave you alone.

Your other option, if it gets REALLY, REALLY, REALLY bad, is to take out your cell phone when he starts on one of his tirades & hit the record button to get his verbal abuse---word for word---that can be replayed for administration. I would bet $1,000 that if you take your phone out, his mouth will shut immediately because he isn't going to want his verbal abuse to be reproduced to people that matter. And, by "people that matter", I mean the state medical licensing board. Verbal abuse is something the state medical board can charge him with and find him unable to manage his anger, as well as unfit to practice. They can suspend his license to practice, order him to attend anger management courses and put him on probation for his bullying behavior. An isolated incident can be blown off, but repeated episodes of severe verbal abuse should not be tolerated. As I said, I am sure the hospital administrators are quite aware of his behavior. If they choose to do nothing, that's fine. But, with your recording in hand, play it for the upper level management and let them know that their willful failure to discipline him will cause you to go to higher levels in an effort to cease his bullying because you are not willing to tolerate his infantile behavior and a person of the caliber should not behave that way. I bet that will open their eyes---if he is placed on probation or suspended, that means no $$$$$$ for the hospital, and some potentially very bad media press about how an abusive surgeon was allowed to work in the hospital all the while he was verbally abusing the nursing staff.

[ETT_8.0]

I recently worked on a group project for our ICU to make staff aware of real life bully situations in the workplace. We found great resources on the AACN website to address cases like these. The best way to handle this situation is to pull the physician aside where you can address your concerns to him. If you are unable to speak with him one on one, then escalate it to your nursing leaders as appropriate. Bottom line, no one should have to deal with bullying at the workplace. Best of luck!

Here is the link of the resources we used from the AACN website.

Bullying in the Workplace: It Harms More Than the Bullied - AACN

[chacha82, ADN, BSN]

If you have had nothing but praise from other MDs and your coworkers, don't let this one get to you (I know, easier said than done). If he is gruff, saying things like, "I ordered it, didn't I?" you are unlikely to change his affect and it's honestly not worth it. You have enough fish to fry. When he walks away you can vent with another coworker in a discreet area or blow off steam about it but you are not likely to change his habits. If he is truly yelling or belittling you, say very calmly and quietly (and make sure other people are around) "I am happy to discuss this with you, but you need to calm down. Let me know when you are ready to proceed." Yelling in an ICU is incredibly inappropriate. Document it (not in patient chart) and go to your charge nurse.

[shaktikate]

The bullying has nothing to do with your being a new nurse. I'd been an RN for 35 years when an ER physician did the same thing. She had made countless others quit, many on Day 1. She was the department manager's friend; he was responsible for bringing her to that ER. My formal complaint resolution? She was a doctor, and I was a nurse. End of story. I left and am much happie; she's still there bullying everyone for fun and games-with full administrative support.

[rauletto]

My recommendation is to up channel it to your nurse manager. If there's no response from her then you would contact whoever she reports to which might be the director of nursing or the chief nursing officer. In addition to following that chain of command, I would get onto the medical board or the medical Licensing website and file a complaint against him. You can actually look up the physician in the state that you live in under medical licensing just like you would if you were going into the board of nursing so in this case it would be the board of medicine for that state. Then there are options to file a complaint about that particular person. But usually my recommendation would be to start at the lowest level as mentioned earlier in this comment section. And if there's no action, I would seek the latter route whereby you get onto the licensing for medical doctors in the state where you practice and reside. That will definitely get attention and hopefully address the issue because my hunch is that you are not the only one that's being bullied.

Respectfully,

Dr. Roxellen Auletto, RN, MLA, MSN, PNP, ANP-BC, DNP

Lt Col, Air National Guard, Nurse Corps

[DysrhythmiaRN11]

That's the thing. You are a new nurse and this Doctor is trying to make himself look good at your expense. I find that many Doctors, not all have some type of self-esteem issues and they prey on the weak. I've been a nurse for 5 years now and let me tell you'initually I was bullied by both Doctors and colleagues: Pathetic. With time and with increasing knowledge you learn how to deal with it and you certainly learn how to engage and put a bully in its place. Through these years I've learned how to speak up and due to my knowledge and experience no one can bully me anymore and also I do not allow everything to get to me as long as my patients are safe, my license isn't at stake andI've done my best job I could do. It was a hard and long rode. Hang in there, it will get better.

[brpeifer]

Please, new nurse, giving you advice from a retired BSN of 30 yrs. nightshift cardiac care. There is no way you are ready to work in this unit. Get a job in med surg for at least 2 years and then work in cardiac. The Dr. is right and is worried about his patients under your care, get the chip off your shoulder and open up your mind.

[Jolie, BSN]

New member, joined today, first & only post. Troll alert?

[Kooky Korky, BSN, RN]

The bullying has nothing to do with your being a new nurse. I'd been an RN for 35 years when an ER physician did the same thing. She had made countless others quit, many on Day 1. She was the department manager's friend; he was responsible for bringing her to that ER. My formal complaint resolution? She was a doctor, and I was a nurse. End of story. I left and am much happie; she's still there bullying everyone for fun and games-with full administrative support.

Had you been there long enough to have a pension? Seniority? People can't just up and leave every time the going gets rough. Doing so might have been the right thing for you, but some people would lose a great deal by quitting their jobs.

Countless? Take a guess as to how many others quit.

35 years? I know what you're saying, as I have been a nurse for longer than that. But reading the replies on AN lately it seems there's a new day in nurse-doctor relationships and in what doctor malbehaviors hospitals will tolerate - at least, to some degree. And it's high time.

So, OP, where do things stand?

[Kooky Korky, BSN, RN]

Please, new nurse, giving you advice from a retired BSN of 30 yrs. nightshift cardiac care. There is no way you are ready to work in this unit. Get a job in med surg for at least 2 years and then work in cardiac. The Dr. is right and is worried about his patients under your care, get the chip off your shoulder and open up your mind.

Pardon me, but BALONEY!!