How many of you married doctors?

MQ Edna · Jul 8, 2002

Originally posted by JHUnurse
Hi all!

I'm currently a student at Johns Hopkins SON, just starting, and I'm wondering how hard it will be to meet and date some of the male med students here to seek out future husbands. Don't get me wrong, marrying a doctor is NOT the reason I want to be a nurse, it's just an added benefit. :) Let's face it, my nursing salary will not be enough to live in NYC, where I want to live, AND support a family.

So how many of you managed to score doctor husbands, and how'd you do it? Any suggestions on how I can meet some of them?

Thanks!

JHUnurse, after reading your post defending yourself and your nursing ambitions, I went back to your original one (quoted here) to be sure that I hadn't somehow misconstrued you. Well, here it all is, in black and white. "I'm wondering how hard it will be to meet and date some of the male med students here to seek out future husband." "So how many of you manged to score doctor husbands and how'd you do it?"

I'd refrained from replying because I wasn't sure if I could be civil. Now I just can't stand it any longer. Sleepyeyes mentioned the "nursing instructor from hell". Well, toots, I have BEEN the "nursing instructor from hell". Or the GN mentor from hell, or the Clinical Nurse Specialist from hell. If somebody is really, truly trying hard, working hard, asking intelligent questions, wanting to succeed, nurses like me can be the best friend you ever had. We'll stay late, go the extra mile and bust a gut to help you. But if you're the person batting her pretty eyelashes at the medical student down the hall while your call light is going off...Well, I'll bend over backwards to get you OUT of this profession. Not only have I seen nursing students like you, I've worked with Nurse/Doctor wives like you, and the first sentence out of their mouths is always, "My husband, the DOCTOR, said..."

If you can't hack it on your own, by all means, please do an "Anna Nicole" and marry a rich, 98 year old, preferrably dying guy with a good insurance policy. But please don't insult this profession while doing it. JeannieM

LasVegasRN · Jul 8, 2002

Wooo, I am still cracking up over Nursegoodguys flower child post. That was HILARIOUS! :rotfl:

I agree with all said here. Love your post JeannieM.

bestblondRN · Jul 8, 2002

JeannieM--

You said it ALL!!!!

dianthe1013 · Jul 8, 2002

I do not reccomend finding an engineer.....I have yet to find one with a sense of humor??? Now don't beat me up for that one...

Hee! You know, Rhona... It did take me several months to spot that sense of humor in my fiance... LOL I thought, at first, that it wasn't there...

JHUnurse, I'm also a student, and I hope you really are worried about things like clinicals and instructors and classes and preceptors and lions and tigers and bears, oh...my. ::sigh:: Like the rest of us. It's soooo hard to get through this program without having to worry about men at the same time. :)

As for answering your question, which no one really has because it worries everyone, here ya go: Your best bet is to either hang out at the nearest med student-populated bar, or make nicey-nice with a fun & friendly looking current med student - male or female. S/he can introduce you to some of her/his classmates.

As a student myself, however, I should tell you this. Pleae be prepared for some of the guys to view you as:

1) a ready-to-roll trollop with whom to toy,

2) an intellectually-inferior underling, or

3) completely below them, because you won't understand a word they're saying.

Ha. Sad, but sometimes very true. They're not all like that, but stereotypes DO form for reason, after all...

Donna :)

live4today, RN · Jul 8, 2002

originally posted by dianthe1013
..........maybe we should set up a dating service for nurses and engineers?

seriously, though, it's weird. a lot of nurses i know are attached to engineers. wonder why?

donna :)

why??? let me count the ways you shouldn't!!! my first husband was an engineer...three degrees...made lots of money...but...when we met we were teenagers, then went through the military together (he the soldier/me the wife)...then when he got out of the military and returned to the civilian sector to work, he climbed the corporate ladder faster than anyone most people know...and obtained several degrees in the process.

sounds like someone's dream man, huh? think again! :rolleyes: he's the nightmare on elmstreet you blindly recognize as being a night in shining armor until the claws of evil deception and lies he is damn good at show their many faces to you. the man is the :devil: incarnate. beware!!! or be fooled...big time...like i was. :angryfire

the 'true test of a man...or woman for that matter' is not in their occupation ladies and gents....it is in their character...c - h - a - r - a - c - t - e - r....and that spells...all together now....character. :kiss

sbic56, BSN, RN · Jul 8, 2002

Geez, peers...

What happened to being nonjudgemental? Could it be she is 19 and being appropriately naive? I thought the thread was a joke at first, but then realized she was looking for advice from what she thought would be wise and supportive nurses. Sure didn't get that did she? And what's with the "stay out of nursing" crap? Just because she wants to be taken care of doesn't mean she can't be a good nurse. And besides, in MHO, docs don't necessarily have the corner on the prick market; they come in all shapes, sizes and professions!

OBNURSEHEATHER · Jul 8, 2002

Originally posted by sbic56
she was looking for advice from what she thought would be wise and supportive nurses. Sure didn't get that did she?

And what's with the "stay out of nursing" crap?

The wise supportive nurses did give her their advice - we told her to get real!

And the stay out of nursing crap? Well, it's not that we think she won't make a good nurse. It's just good nurse or not, most nurses are tired of being portrayed in a light that this poster seems to want to perpetuate.

Heather

sbic56, BSN, RN · Jul 8, 2002

OBNURSEHEATHER

I see what you are saying, but that "60's nurse" mentallity where the nurse goes into the profession just to find her doctor husband has already pretty much gone by the wayside. That is obvious by the responses here! I think that piece of advice to stay away from nursing was way too harsh and hurtful to the original poster. I'm thinking we could've been a little kinder and gentler toward her...especially where she is new to the boards and so young. It's a little thing called tact.

imenid37 · Jul 8, 2002

wow! i am sorry, but you are a tad bit shallow jhu. just goes to prove you don't have to have common sense to go to a prestigious institution. good luck w/ your nursing courses. there's a lot more to nursing school than dating a med student and a lot of great guys out there who are and aren't docs. if you're only 19, i'd say have fun, use safe-sex practices (no mater who you're with), and be careful down there in that bad neighborhood in east baltimore. so glad i am not 19 anymore, it's a scary world out there!

Sleepyeyes · Jul 8, 2002

Originally posted by sbic56
OBNURSEHEATHER

I see what you are saying, but that "60's nurse" mentallity where the nurse goes into the profession just to find her doctor husband has already pretty much gone by the wayside. That is obvious by the responses here! I think that piece of advice to stay away from nursing was way too harsh and hurtful to the original poster. I'm thinking we could've been a little kinder and gentler toward her...especially where she is new to the boards and so young. It's a little thing called tact.

How "harsh and hurtful" is she going to feel if she has her priorities too screwed up to get through the program? Whatta waste! Better someone's honest with her here and now than have her go through it at clinicals.

nella-pea · Jul 8, 2002

Honey, if you EVEN want to have some semblance of a life of your own after you get married, don't bark up that tree. You'll have the $$, but you'll also have total responsibility for the kids (diapers and all-nighters when they're babies, band practice and soccer when they're older), bills, running the house, planning the vacations, etc, and MABYE you'll be able to work when they get in middle school. Sounds like a single parent to me. If your plans involve having an au pair, that defeats the absolute joy of having the kids.....it's not worth the trade-off.

You sound like my old roomie right after we graduated--she would only look at men who made over 80 grand (alot in 1980!!). She's still not married....wonder why..........

LasVegasRN · Jul 8, 2002

Originally posted by sbic56
OBNURSEHEATHER

I see what you are saying, but that "60's nurse" mentallity where the nurse goes into the profession just to find her doctor husband has already pretty much gone by the wayside. That is obvious by the responses here! I think that piece of advice to stay away from nursing was way too harsh and hurtful to the original poster. I'm thinking we could've been a little kinder and gentler toward her...especially where she is new to the boards and so young. It's a little thing called tact.

I don't think this is the place to come for a "candy-coated" response. She wanted a real answer - it was given, several times by several different people in several different ways. If she can't handle honest responses here, she certainly won't be able to handle real life.