How hard is it to write a stinkin' recommendation letter

[Lovelymo79]

I feel like screaming!

So, I applied to summer nurse externship programs. I knew from the start that everything would be easy to get together but recommendation letters may be a problem. Not because I'm not worthy of getting one..but because I would have to depend on other people to write them. And I was right.

For one externship, there were 2 forms. I applied in November so I got my clinical instructor (Ms. CI) at the time (last semester) to fill it out and another non-clinical instructor to fill it out (Ms. J) . Cool. For the 2nd one, I haven't heard back from them yet but I applied to another program they have where they will pay for my schooling in exchange for me working for them. I needed 3 references and 2 recommendation letters. Got the references and 1 recommendation letter (from my new clinical instructor for this semester -- Ms. B). It was December, so I had asked my first clinical instructor (Ms. CI) for the 2nd recommendation letter for the program. She promised she would get one together and I believed her because she was able to do the 1st one so quickly. Not.

So, here it is THREE months later and I'm still waiting. Thankfully, the coordinator of the program stated that it was no rush because they didn't start reviewing the applications until early spring. But, now, it IS early spring! I also have an externship interview next Monday (the 15th for a 3rd externship), and I need 2 recommendation letters. I still have my current clinical instructor's letter -- Ms. B. But, I need another letter!

So, I am going crazy. I emailed, called and talked in person for Ms. CI to get me a recommendation letter and she has failed so I have given up on her. I spoke with my manager (I'm a nursing assistant part-time) to see if she could write me a recommendation letter but she was like "What am I suppose to put in to it?" HUH?? You're a manager over 3 units and a regular floor..how do you NOT know what to put in the letter? So, I'm a little shaky on her. I emailed Ms. J (my non-clinical instructor) to write a letter but that letter would only be good for the interview. I would STILL need another letter for the program at the hospital because since I put her down as a reference, I can't have her writing a letter -- go figure. I haven't heard back or seen Ms. J yet, which is weird. I've gotten so desperate that I emailed my former boss at my corporate America law firm job (the job I had before I left for nursing school). She's actually at a conference but she said that although she hopes I get a letter from someone from school since it would probably be more relevant than her letter, that she would email me an unsigned letter of recommendation.

So, what should I do? I've given up on Ms. CI. I hope Ms. J gets back to me. I won't be back at the hospital until Friday but I may try to run up there to the hospital to see if I can get my manager to write a letter (as well as bring a sample letter so she can see what goes in a letter!). Would a letter from my former boss in corporate America be relevant? Or should I just email the interviewer and tell them I haven't been able to secure a second letter?

What would YOU do?

Thanks in advance!

[caliotter3]

I agree Moogie, I just decided not the use the phrase "passive aggressive" in my post. It jumped out at me that this is what the instructor was doing. Kind of mean spirited, if you ask me, and not very adult.

[sharpeimom]

no excuses... some instructors and professors are terrible and/or unmotivated about writing recommedation and reference letters for students, but not all are. i'm married to a professor who

has written hundreds and hundreds of letters for students over a three decade period of time.

what helps him is lots notice (which you did) as well as giving him two different deadlines: when

you want it to be mailed by and when the last date it may be received by. the second one is so if it doesn't get there, he can send a second one or, in a pinch, email one to the appropriate person so the student doesn't lose out. did you remember to send your professor the correct address and full name of the person the letter should be sent to? as for what to say in the letter? all letters are not alike because different people and different jobs require differing letters and information.

if you're asking several years after the class, jog the prof's memory. not just jane doe, but jane doe from 1995, i sat in the third row, in the fourth seat and was friends with sally smith. remind him about that great paper on _______ you wrote that he liked so much.

my husband just read what i wrote and added that it really helps him a lot if students include a stamped envelope with the person's name and address on it, so he's sure he has the correct address and stamped because we pay our bills online, correspond with family and friends by email and don't always have a stamp handy and that can delay getting a letter into the mail. mailing it at school can add a day. he said also not to ask a professor you only did marginally with. don't just send him/her a packet of information and assume he or she will write it the letter -- please ask.

hope my suggestions help.

kathy

shar pei mom:paw::paw:

[thinwildmercury]

this is my worst nightmare!

i hope you can figure out a solution quick, and i'm sorry i can't offer you a solution but i'll send positive thoughts your way =)

[helikias]

That is downright depressing. I was a freelance writer for eight years and am in a graduate program for nursing education. I try very hard to write well and be articulate, at least in written communication. I hope my future students will appreciate their well-written letters of recommendation someday.

Warning to future nursing students: someday Moogie the Grammar Freak may be grading your care plans so make sure your spelling and punctuation are correct!

Hi Moogie,

(raising hand) Freelance writer here too ... off topic but have you ever published on the Amazon Kindle Platform? It's almost like having someone hand you free $$ -- thought I would pass along in case you want to check it out.

[Winnie04]

Hi,

Sorry you are experiencing this frustrating situation. Sometimes when I ask for a letter of recommendation, I offer to provide a "draft letter" to the recommender...some recommenders say "that's ok, I don't need one," but others are happy to have something to work with. When I write the "draft," I write exactly the kind of letter I would hope to get, highlighting my accomplishments, experience, and personal attributes. Most recommenders add something of their own to the letter, but once someone used my draft without making any changes (so I am glad I wrote a good draft!) This certainly speeds up the process since the letter writers don't have to start from scratch.

Good luck!

[Lovelymo79]

All great advice, guys! I make it easy for the nursing instructors. All the students have mailboxes at the school. I just ask them to put the letter in a sealed envelope and drop it in my mailbox. What was SUPPOSE to happen was I take that envelope and include it with my application and other documents. So, the instructor didn't have to mail anything..didn't need an address, name or stamp. Even now, I would mail it myself.

I would think instructors who have written letters before..and especially those who have a "check here" form already at their disposal..wouldn't need a draft letter but alas, I see everyone needs help.

I'm going to get my corporate America boss to email me a letter today, do a draft letter for both my current manager and one of the RNs I work with (for the other program) and call it a day.

I shall always remember this and never take a request for a recommendation letter lightly!

[GitanoRN, BSN, MSN, RN]

Evidently, the people you asked for the recommendation letters are not fit or have to much on their plate to write one. In addition, you could write one and take it to them and if they agree with it's content, they could sign it in front of you. Lastly, at this point in the game you're at their mercy, I wish you luck in all of your future endeavors~

[brighella]

What I've been taught for years is that with recommendation letters, the best way to go about getting recommendations is to give an electronic copy of a draft letter to the reccomender. Then they can edit it as they see fit. Its a lot easier to react to a draft than it is to crank out a letter from a blank page. This has worked for me well on several occasions. This is standard operating procedure, particularly when asking for recommendations from faculty.

[caliotter3]

I've been asked on many occasions to write my own letter and the person would sign it as written or edit it and sign it. If the person asked puts the onus on you, at least you will know that it is getting done.

[Lovelymo79]

All ended well. Took you guys advice and wrote a letter for my manager (I'm still flabbergasted by her inability to write her own recommendation letter but I guess that's due to my business background where people always come and go and everyone has that skill). She signed it and I'm good to go!

Thanks everyone!

[vegas2009]

This is so true. When I graduated from nursing school last May, I asked one of my clinical instructors for a letter of recommendation. It took several months and a few reminders before I was able to get a letter from her. Needless to say, I gave up on getting a letter from her. Other students who requested a letter of recommendation from her found themselves in the same boat. Sad, sad, sad!

I don't think it's sad. I think she did that on purpose because she hates writing recommendation letters for anyone. You just asked the wrong instructor. Look at it this way, at least, she doesn't discriminate. She just sucks in writing letters because she hates writing them!

[Lovelymo79]

I don't think it's sad. I think she did that on purpose because she hates writing recommendation letters for anyone. You just asked the wrong instructor. Look at it this way, at least, she doesn't discriminate. She just sucks in writing letters because she hates writing them!

It IS sad because the instructor isn't woman enough to tell the truth and stop needless worrying of the students. It's a shame -- if you don't like writing recommendation letters, fine..just say that. Don't lead anyone on for months.