I've only been a nurse for a little over a year and I have hated it since day 1. People told me it would get better. It did get better once I got used to things, but I still genuinely hate this job. I don't think acute care is for me.
The thing is I feel like such an outsider. So many people I speak to love bedside nursing. A lot of people I know just changed to SWAT (float pool) to make more money...nursing just has such a large toll on my body: lack of sleep, running around, barely eating...
I just don't get what I'm doing wrong here. There are also a lot of nurses I know that are in grad programs and are leaving the bedside once they graduate. I just feel so stuck because I don't want to do any of this...I used to be so motivated with my career and now I just don't care about nursing. I don't know what to do. I've been miserable for SO long ?
I look up other jobs but I'm never qualified enough for them. Sometimes I do apply but there's so much competition. I feel so stuck and miserable ? I hate being a nurse. I have even looked up engineering programs and business degrees because I hate nursing. Does anyone else feel similarly?
Funny you should say this. I was in a class one time where the vast majority of attendees were new grads. We had a section on "self-care" (barf) and had to go around and say what we did to relieve stress. After endless answers of walking, reading, knitting (insert eye roll for all of these) with the instructor smiling and nodding enthusiastically it was my turn and I kind of lost it. It went sort of like this..."you know what nurses do to deal with the crap they go through? That's easy, look at the back 20 pages of your board's quarterly newsletter where they list the disciplinary actions. That's where you'll find what nurses do. We drink and divert drugs, over eat, are sexually promiscuous or go home every night and assume the fetal position. We yell at our kids, we get divorced and we commit suicide. Those of us who manage to hang on are dying a death by a thousand cuts. Then we go to work for companies that pay lip-service to self care by dinging us for calling off and providing things like massages that only management can attend because we are too busy, you know, taking care of patients all the while patting themselves on the back for taking such good care of their "family" of employees. No human being can see the things we do and not be affected by it down to our very souls. Look around this room. Just a few months ago most of these nurses were in school and they dealt with stress by partying and we do nothing to teach them anything different. I mean come on...what 21 year old deals with a kid being scraped off the pavement by taking a walk? We offer our young nurses nothing tangible in the way of handling this very new kind of stress and wonder why so many throw in the towel before they've had a chance to succeed. The sad truth of it is that most of us experienced nurses are sucked so dry we feel we have very little to give so the cycle continues." Yeah, I spent a minute in my boss's office after that little rant but I still believe it's true and I have no idea how to fix it. To the OP, I'm sorry you hate it. I wish I had words of advice for you but I don't. Well, except maybe go for a walk. ?
Well.....I actually can’t say I have done any of those things ? But I did get a good laugh out of the brutal honesty! I do know I have found the vast majority of companies treat nurses like we are very easily disposable as employees. So in all honesty, I know use this perspective to my advantage! I rarely answer work texts, I don’t ever offer to pick up a shift (unless it’s to help out a coworker because I do appreciate my team!), and have stopped going to all the stupid “fluff” committees and nurse appreciation things. I don’t want an appreciation breakfast.....I would rather have a raise ?
1. you go home and have a coke. ( or a glass of wine)
2. you do home and have a rum and Coke,(2 glasses of wine)
3. you go home and a straw into the bottle of rum. ( the whole damn bottle of wine)
???
I had a night a couple of months ago where I drank the whole damn bottle. A particularly painful death when I showed up for 3 of 3. Pt had been following commands for me, but had brain death over night. I was shocked.
I don’t always have the healthiest coping mechanisms like I said. But three days away from the job and spending time with my family helped. And detaching myself from the situation in those 3 days also helped. A big part of me wanted to go back for the donor walk. But I knew that wasn’t healthy for me.
I have worked less than full time hours for years and years. It gives me the rewards of working, financial benefits, but limits my exposure.
Per diem work means I never have to join a committee, am in charge only in emergencies, and I get to enjoy meaningful work out in the world, but only one or two days at week. I went per diem for childcare reasons. The kids are grown, but I like my freedom too much.
I am lucky to work in a unit that while busy at times, has a reasonable workload, a free charge nurse with no patient assignment, a transport nurse for ICU patients, IV team, a manager who cares and strong coworkers. I haven't missed a lunch break in years.
Less than full time hours in a quality unit, a life outside of work and reasonable expectations have benefitted me.
I have never, ever prioritized my job over my life.
I don't want to prioritize this job over my life, but I'm having a hard time separating them since I feel like I'm always at work. For example, I had to switch from night shift to day shift within the span of 2 days. so my days off I'm just recuperating (I.e sleeping) ? so how the heck do I enjoy my own time?
Nursing was my second career so I was pretty much stuck so just had to make the best out of it, which I did.
nursing is my first career...I am only 23 I want to get out of this ASAP but I am too scared. I love working with children. I love babies particularly, but nursing stresses me out too much to the point where I am severely depressed and get rashes
2 hours ago, LovingLife123 said:
But three days away from the job and spending time with my family helped.
I think this is why I am so miserable...most other people have husbands, kids, etc...I am a single 23 year old girl who goes to an apartment alone ? it's so depressing I hate this job
Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.
Well, you ARE young so there is plenty of time to change careers. If you are that miserable, I would look into doing something else. I am sorry you are so unhappy. Life is way too short to be so miserable. Good luck.
Your job is one of many hats you wear in life. Don’t make it the biggest hat
This is the best advice. Separate work from life: say no to overtime, extra shifts, meetings and endless projects. Limit your stress. Be present at work, but set boundaries when you are home. Don't text your manager. Don't let scheduling call you personally asking to come in when they are short. They are ALWAYS short. Live your life first.
speedynurse, ADN, BSN, RN, EMT-P
544 Posts
Well.....I actually can’t say I have done any of those things ? But I did get a good laugh out of the brutal honesty! I do know I have found the vast majority of companies treat nurses like we are very easily disposable as employees. So in all honesty, I know use this perspective to my advantage! I rarely answer work texts, I don’t ever offer to pick up a shift (unless it’s to help out a coworker because I do appreciate my team!), and have stopped going to all the stupid “fluff” committees and nurse appreciation things. I don’t want an appreciation breakfast.....I would rather have a raise ?