Hospice...job or way of life?

Nicole2010 · Jul 1, 2010

I'm new to hospice & I'm quickly learning that it is very easy to work 50+ hours a week. I love my patients & the care I provide, but I have a life and family as well. It's a way of life if you choose so. I refuse to sacrifice my home life because realistically I'm replaceable. My family will always be there regardless where I work.

Hospicetex · Jul 1, 2010

I too find Hospice nursing requires more than the typical work week. I also agree with the above posters that 50+ hour weeks are on the low end of common. I think many of us work more than 50 hours. I have heard from management that we are expected to live this as a way of life, that we need to be committed to our patients and available at all costs. Like you I also have a family, children and have responsibilities to my family that do not include working. I love what I am doing but don't enjoy feeling guilty when I want to go home after 8 or 9 hour work days which do not include lunch. I understand that we are open until five and then the on call nurse is on but I would like to clean my house, cook a real meal and do some laundry as I am getting embarrassed by the clothing my kids are wearing. I am not an inexperienced nurse but am working in an area that is at least more than fifty miles from home. I have time management down, that is not a problem but am learning in hospice that I can't be as regimented as I am in hospital nursing.

Am I getting burned out? You bet! I love what I am doing, I love my patients but am seriously looking at going back to the hospital because when I am nearing my end of life I don't think I will be regretting not seeing one more patient a day but will regret not spending enough time with my family.

leslie :-D · Jul 1, 2010

personally, i think it's a load of crap...

that we hospice nurses are such martyrs, that we forsake ourselves and all others, just to remain altruistic and available?

bull.

more than any other specialty, we need to define and implement boundaries, or burnout will occur far too prematurely.

i have rn after my name, not dm (doormat).

puhleeze.

leslie

AmandaCRN · Jul 1, 2010

I totally agree with you Leslie, however, I feel guilty because I sooo want to be available for my pt's and families when they need me. I also feel guilty when management asks me to do something extra like an admission (on my non-admission day) and I refuse because I feel like I am letting my team down and perhaps this pt who may really need our services right away. Ok, so I guess I have the martyr complex :rolleyes:

leslie :-D · Jul 1, 2010

I totally agree with you Leslie, however, I feel guilty because I sooo want to be available for my pt's and families when they need me. I also feel guilty when management asks me to do something extra like an admission (on my non-admission day) and I refuse because I feel like I am letting my team down and perhaps this pt who may really need our services right away. Ok, so I guess I have the martyr complex

amanda, you're not being a martyr if it's something you want to do.

it is when one begrudgingly continues to work all sorts of extended hours, that it could be perceived as martyrdom.

for some it's a job, for others, a way of life.

there is definitely not any clear cut answer.:)

just don't let anyone other than yourself, dictate as to what hospice work is to you.

leslie

annacnatorn · Jul 1, 2010

So, Here is my story...

Worked to help open a Hospice Agency, Gave them 6 years of my life, missed many family events/gatherings.

Got my hours/pay cut...NO formal notice, I was treated like yesterdays trash, a "New" DON..who was an LVN, didnt know crap, I had to show her...

I get injured on the job, I no longer exist in their vocabulary. The agency closes/changes names, I get no notice, office moves 3 times, changes names, (STILL the same owner), Me still injured, no job....I'm last weeks trash, gone and forgotten. The owner will not return any of my phone calls.

Do I love Hospice work, Yes. Do I miss Hospice...Yes, I do.

I love it, I live for it, but have learned that 8 hours a day is enough. I have a family/life just as the others do.

Hospicetex · Jul 1, 2010

personally, i think it's a load of crap...
that we hospice nurses are such martyrs, that we forsake ourselves and all others, just to remain altruistic and available?
bull.
more than any other specialty, we need to define and implement boundaries, or burnout will occur far too prematurely.
i have rn after my name, not dm (doormat).
puhleeze.
leslie

I am certainly not living my life to work and to please my boss. I work so that my children can have a better way of life. I am a single mother to three. I have no choice but to work.

My boss will call close to quitting time to ask me to drive to go see "prn" or "do an admit because so and so has been swamped all day". If I say no I have other things I must do it is in the tone and the wording used by my boss. We have all said no and then come the next meeting we "heard" about it. I don't feel like I should be available at all costs, I feel we are entitled to work our day and then go home to our lives. I understand hospice as we have used it for our own loved ones.

All I guess I am trying to say and doing a poor job of it is at my place of employment we are required to "give it all" and be available at all costs. I know others on call will call me to go see or do a death visit. If it is my weekend off I usually am doing something with the kids but if I can I will help. I just don't like what is said if I can't help.

AmandaCRN · Jul 1, 2010

I know exactly how you feel hospicetex and am beginning to establish boundaries, but I don't think management likes it very much because I was the one they called who almost always said yes.

tencat · Jul 1, 2010

Management will tell you that to squeeze every last drop out of you. Then they will toss you out with the garbage.....You mean nothing to the powers that be. It does not make you popular to say "No." I found that out, too....but you HAVE to be willing to say "Sorry, I'd love to, but I can't." Firmly. Hospice is not 'a way of life'. It is rewarding and important, and at the end of the day I know I've done something worth while. But it is a job when all is said and done. Your family (and mine, for that matter) is way more important. If your employer is unwilling to understand that, then it's time to find a new job. I took a stand with my employer, knowing I could well lose my job, but it worked out for me. If it hadn't, I was prepared to quit this hospice and find another one. I'm NOT going to sacrifice my sanity and my family's happiness for an employer that sees me as an expendable commodity.

caliotter3 · Jul 1, 2010

There is supposed to be more to life than work. People who find themselves out on the street when their "way of life" throws them there are just as bad off as those who called their job what it is, a "job".

tewdles, RN · Jul 1, 2010

Seriously folks...if you are working for a hospice who treats you like a visit machine, start looking for another hospice employer. If your agency has no qualms about sacrificing your personal life to care for their patients, and criticizes you if you say no...start looking for another employer.

If you feel like YOU are obligated to the patients more than the agency is...you are at risk for burnout ...pronto. Hospice nurses are not islands. We do not provide hospice care in a vacuum. This MUST be a team approach and that means that other nurses CAN see patients on your team...that MSW and pastoral care can respond to prn visits for dysfunctional families...that you may take a break and have time away from work.

I worked for a hospice that threatened the staff, had unreasonable expectations, and were NEVER satisfied with the efforts of the nurses. Nurses were told on a regular basis..."if you don't like it go elsewhere, there are tons of nurses looking for work". I am long gone...but the staff there are angry, tired, and have very poor professional self esteem. The agency replaces more nurses than it retains EVERY YEAR. The turnover rate for MSWs is also very high.

For many of us, hospice is a "calling"...that does not mean that I am called to be abused by my employer. Hospice is too emotionally demanding to also have to deal with emotionally abusive employers. We experience cumulative loss, we are frequently sad with our patients, we often have hectic and demanding work loads, and we have the added stress of driving in what are occasionally dangerous conditions and areas...there is no room in this specialty for unsupportive agencies which want to displace THEIR responsibilities onto us.

It IS okay to say no to after-hours visits if you are not signed up to provide that. The patients are not "ours" they are patient's of the hospice. We simply work for the hospice to provide the nursing care. The nursing needs of those patients during your scheduled off hours are NOT our responsibility...they are the responsibility of the agency.

Hospice nurses MUST have clear and good boundaries. Hospice nurses MUST take care of themselves in order to be healthy enough to care for the patients. Part of that self care is attention to the things you love...family, hobbies, etc.

Please do not be bullied into "living" hospice for your company...let the owner or managers or directors "live" it.

As leslie said...it is a bunch of crap...and it is based in disrespect for you and what you do.

Take good care of your patients and then go home and take good care of yourself.