This is like my GREATEST fear! Let me tell you I told my best friend I was not gonna say anything at her wedding (when I was the maid of honor) becuase I could NOT do it!!! If I am up in front of people I start to shake and turn red....its so bad.
I actually took group discussion for my speech requirment to get out of this situation and now I am finding some school I wanna go to only take PUBLIC speaking (where your by yourself).
I just hate attention on myself of any kind, and I want to get over it. even in group discussion my words would get shaky while I talked...
Its sad because Im a great student but I dont want any kind of spotlight on me.
Anyone took speech yet or about to take it....what is the secret? :chair:
You can take public speaking classes online now. You videotape your assignments and send them in. I am SO terrified of public speaking that this is the only way I would consider doing it.
I haven't taken a speech class. I am quite 'stage shy' like many have described. I do know that when I gave the prayer at my high school graduation in front of hundreds of people the most amazing thing happened. I was so happy that my anxiety didn't have room to get going. I wasn't nervous at all. (A miracle!) I was too happy. Since then, a few times I've had to do public speaking. I've learned to NOT PREPARE. Yes, I meant to say, DO NOT PREPARE. It's the anticipatory thinking that leads to the anxiety. I would jot down the outline of what to say then forget about it. Every time a thought of "OMG I have to do that tomorrow" comes up, SQUELCH IT! Then when you get up there you are concentrating on remembering what to say and smiling, speaking clearly, etc.
Works wonderfully for me. I do know it flies in the face of the usual advice, i.e. be very prepared. I just can't think about it, and I'm fine.
I really think the key (at least for me, and probably some others) is to not let the anticipatory anxiety get going. It is sooooooooo hard to not think about delivering the speech. If I indulge in even one thought of "oh no I'm so scared, how will I look" etc it snowballs. Then I'm shaky, red faced and generally pathetic. Can't let the thoughts start.
Specializes in med/surg, telemetry, IV therapy, mgmt.
what is the secret? :chair:
Actors who suffer from this learn to focus their attention on various spots around the auditorium such as the back wall and the side walls at their eye level. You could even go so far as to place little sticky notes at various places on the walls before class for you to focus your eyesight on. That way you are not looking into people's faces although it looks like you are. You just have to remember to shift your focus onto different spots from time to time to make it look like you are looking around at your audience when in reality you are just looking at a spot. In fact, if I'm remembering correctly my speech instructor of 37 years ago taped 3 x 5 cards at various places on the walls of the classroom (we didn't have post-it-notes in those days). You also kind of go inside yourself and shut everything else out and give your speech as you reheorificed it. That way, you can focus on the rate of your words and that you are pronouncing words clearly. Decide what you are going to do with your hands. Are you going to be holding cards? If not, you need to practice and be mindful of what you are going to do with your hands during a speech so you don't look like a stiff robot. This as well, is something that actors reheorifice. All your movements with your hands can be planned out and reheorificed. The other trick is to have your speech prepared well ahead of time and practice, practice, practice until it is pretty much a memorized essay that you are just reciting. I guess you've probably never been in a play. I can tell you that by the time a play is put on, the actors not only know their exact movements and locations for every line they speak (this is called "blocking"), but everyone else's in the cast as well because they have all reheorificed it together so many times! They know when someone in the cast makes a mistake although the audience doesn't.
If you've ever noticed the acts of comedians you will realize that they often do the same jokes over and over. A few of the words may be different each go around, but the major points of the delivery of the joke are always the same. It is because they are reheased over and over and over. Although they sound spontaneous, especially if you've never heard them before, I assure you they are not--their jokes are memorized along with when they need to pause (for laughter) or do some piece of physical work with the mike or their faces. If you put your speechmaking into that context it makes it seem more like a skill, doesn't it? Good luck.
I had to video tape my speeches & mail them in. I lost 5 points on each one b/c I couldn't even do it in front of my hubby. He kept making me laugh. ....I still made 95's on them and an A for the class. :rotfl:
See if there are any alternatives. I had three speech/communications classes I could choose from and I took interpersonal communications. Only once did we have to get up in front of the class and that was as a group. Otherwise as it's interpersonal, you were put in groups or pairs and had to discuss topics or practice reconizing physical or facial cues. It really wasn't that bad.
But then agian, I am a ham. I enjoy doing speeches and being the center of attention. I even did competetive speech in high school. One of the most important things i learned, is when I saw everyone looking at me I froze up. One of the essentials to speech is eye contact. I just couldn't do that without freezing, because I know everyone was looking at me and judging me. So instead of looking at eyes and faces, I looked at forheads. I always got great marks for eye contact, but didn't have to go through the torture of seeing the facial expressions of those watching me.
I loved it. I didn't get nervous during my speech, only before. I prayed first, taped my speech and listened to it over and over. I had my entire speech with me (my teacher said this is not a good idea), but I had the words in large letters that I wanted to recall so it was sort of the outline method in that I did not memorize the speech. I felt comfortable knowing that if I forgot my speech, I had it in front of me.
To not be nervous, I recalled something Debra Messenger said on Oprah. She gets nervous when she has to do a speech, but not when she is acting. I decided to pretend that I was an actress and my speech was a script. It worked. I gave my speech and everyone said I didn't seem nervous. I got an A for the class.
I loved public speaking. It was not too bad. We had to do 6 speeches with our final being a tribute speech. The thing is........EVERYONE had to do it, so no one dared laugh or say something dumb.....I became comfortable with my instructor (very supportive) and classmates. I did not know any of them to begin with so that was scary at first, but the class turned out to be very interesting.
Online speech would be great. I'll look into that- Ive seen some but most require you to come on campus to do your speeches. Still looking for one entirely online.........
I was petrified of this class too, almost as bad as Algebra! What I did was to pick a friendly face in the class and only made eye contact with them, I looked around but only made eye contact with the friendly face Remember this is one of the most common fears, the rest of the class is probably not any happier about it than you are. Also try to identify any bad habits you have and try to prevent yourself from doing them ( I had a bad habit of putting my hands in my pockets, so I picked a topic that required me to wear my Air Force uniform--no putting my hands in those pockets:) ) another time I spoke about how to do CPR and wore my paramedic uniform it was comfortable and I was "dressed for success" In other words it may help you to put the focus on your subject and not on you by using some prop (such as a costume or uniform) or try to use a subject you know intimately for a speech at first.
Specializes in med/surg, telemetry, IV therapy, mgmt.
All these posts made me remember something else. Another thing that nursing students are scared of is having to do return demonstrations of nursing procedures in front of their instructors as well as other students in their nursing labs. Advice: volunteer to be one of the first to get your speech given and get it over with; same with return demonstrations of procedures in nursing lab. It will be over with, your anxiety will be gone, and you can sit back and watch what others are doing with their speeches a bit more objectively.
Isn't it funny how you may not remember what all you did in your pre-reqs, during a semester, but you can recall your entire semester in speech class?
Mine was in the summer semester at 7am! I had a great instructor! He would dim the lights before speeches started and have us do relaxation techniques.
One thing I did for every speech I gave was to make it funny at some point. You would be suprised at how at ease you become when the whole class is laughing. My first speech, impromptu, was about how my sister found my baby, (you know...the babydolls you have to carry around in high school to simulate parenting that you are supposed to "hire" and pay a babysitter to watch when you have to work) that I had left "home alone". She had it commit suicide by hanging it from the air vent on the ceiling of my bedroom, with a suicide note. Luckily she took a picture of it, that I still have. I was able to send that picture around the room. The class burst out in laughter several times. It made it seem like they were a group of friends I was just telling the story to.
On an informative speech, I brought in my African Gray parrot. I also locked my keys in the car:madface: . I think I would have gotten an A no matter what, just for bringing in the bird. People were staring at the bird instead of me. Again, I made them laugh when I was telling them about how long they live and that it is a lifelong pet, and then I thanked my MIL for buying it for us for our wedding gift...something I have to care for for the rest of my life.
For my speech for calling people to action, I talked about guns in the home when you have small children. I told a story about how my dh used to play with his dad's gun, in the backyard with his buddies. I told the class that he is 40 and still won't tell his mom he used to do it.
One of the best things you can do is to find someone in the class to be your "speech guide". When you are giving your speech, look at them quite often for visual clues if there is something you need to do. They can discretely point up if you need to speak louder, sway their finger if you are swaying back and forth, "prayer hands" if you need to fix the position of your hands, point to their watch if you are running low on time.
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Remember this is one of the most common fears, the rest of the class is probably not any happier about it than you are. Also try to identify any bad habits you have and try to prevent yourself from doing them ( I had a bad habit of putting my hands in my pockets, so I picked a topic that required me to wear my Air Force uniform--no putting my hands in those pockets:) ) another time I spoke about how to do CPR and wore my paramedic uniform it was comfortable and I was "dressed for success" In other words it may help you to put the focus on your subject and not on you by using some prop (such as a costume or uniform) or try to use a subject you know intimately for a speech at first.
Brita01
350 Posts
You can take public speaking classes online now. You videotape your assignments and send them in. I am SO terrified of public speaking that this is the only way I would consider doing it.