Help! I'm horrified and grossed out!!

[Eagle2005]

i recently decided to change careers and i've left my office job to go back to nursing school. this is what i really want to do because i love medicine and science and i'm actually a very talented student i seem to learn the subjects with ease. but anyway, i've never worked in a hospital or around people in a healthcare setting. i had worked in a veterinarian clinic when i was in high school and i seemed fine with cleaning animal poop, blood etc. i had also been in the operating room and witnessed a few cats being spayed so i knew i was fine with blood and guts.

so while i'm waiting to get into my program i thought i would get a job as a caregiver, just to get some experience working with actual humans and see how it worked out. i found a place that had an in home caregiver job working with mentally challenged individuals and they offered to pay for me to get my caregiver license which sounded like a good deal so i accepted the job. on my first day on the job they show me what i'm going to be doing: helping patients toilet themselves, documenting the results, and bathing them. at first i thought i could handle it, but the house has 4 adult men to be cared for and when i had to watch one of them being helped on the toilet and showered i was very disturbed by it.

i don't want to sound like a prissy little princess to you experienced nurses but how can i get past the feelings of disgust? i am literally terrified of having to see these guys nude and shower them not to mention wiping their butts. i know it has to be done and i should get over it, does it happen gradually or does it mean i should choose another career? these are the only things i get grossed out by. blood, horrible wounds, mucous, vomit, skin lesions don't bother me! is there anything someone has told you or you told yourself to get through such situations?

i'm going to be so disappointed in myself if i can't go through with it, i've worked so hard and it's my dream to help people and work in a hospital. i know eventually i'll have to do catheters and that thought upsets me too. i guess i could work at a blood bank and just draw blood but my career options would be limited if i did that.

[RKpianoman, APRN]

You get over it fairly quickly. The first few times you help someone bathe or toilet, it's horribly uncomfortable. But after a few bed baths and wiped butts, it just becomes part of the job. I think it took 4 or 5 bed baths before I was comfortable with it, and probably 8 code browns before I was comfortable cleaning a posterior. I'm still slightly uncomfortable with perineal care and inserting catheters on my female patients, but it gets less uncomfortable each time.

Good luck, you'll be fine!

[VioletKaliLPN, LPN]

Wiping butts has never bothered *me*, but a few students in my Nursing class were disgusted by the hygiene issue. What helped one girl was thinking about "What if it was my family member?".

[szeles23]

I am a tad bit intimidated with having to deal with code browns and such. When I had my son I didn't think I could deal with poop but its amazing how becoming a mother really desensitizes you to a lot of things. I guess I will just imagine that I am changing one of my childrens' diapers (even though neither are in diapers any more lol). I'm sure after a few patients you get the hang of it and won't have a problem doing it.

[Eagle2005]

LOL, thats what the girl training me said too. But the problem is I don't have kids and I've never changed a dirty diaper ever. The only time I babysat kids it was for ones that could do that themselves. The family member idea is good though.

Another thing about my caregiver job that has me really freaked out is the fact that one of the guys is extremely agressive about showing his "affection". He likes to grab at me and I don't even want to think about where his hands have been. I don't think I'm going to continue the training for the job though because they want me at some point to be completely alone in this house with the 4 men, and yes they are mentally challenged but they are adult men. They can say he has the mentallity of a 2 year old but obviously still has adult urges. I just don't think thats a safe situation for me to be in. But regardless of that I want to try and get a caregiver job working with seniors and see how it goes. Hopefully that will be less akward for me.

[szeles23]

I can't blame you for that, especially if you don't feel comfortable and you won't have anyone else there with you. I mean its not the man's fault, he's developmentally disabled, but I would think in a situation like that there would need to be two people or something... Obviously if he has the mentality of a 2 year old trapped in the body of an older man, talking to him isn't going to make a difference. I'm just a student so I don't have much experience at that but just go with your gut and if you feel in danger or uncomfortable then I would look elsewhere.

Is there a resident caretaker there? I wouldn't think they would have 4 older men living on their own, if developmentally disabled.

Yeah I was squeamish before I had kids, after having them not much phases me anymore LOL. I would say imagine them as a family member. You might be able to find someone on a caregiver website for senior citizens. A few of the babysitting websites also offer senior care, even senior companion positions. Good luck!

[Tarabara]

It is somewhat uncomfortable and definitely not my favorite part of the day but you have to remember its probably a lot more uncomfortable for your patient than you. Plus, if for some reason you were not able to toilet yourself wouldnt you be so grateful for someone helping you rather than letting you sit in your own waste?

[Iridescent Orchid, CNA, LPN]

I'm currently still a student, but can't help but think about myself taking on these tasks as well. I've helped my mom with my little brother and sister, diaper-wise, but of course it has to be much different on an adult. I figure after a few times, you'll be ok. Things you never would think you'd get comfortable doing, have a way of working out to be second nature...and eventually I feel you'll be able to do it all with no problem. If this is truly your dream, don't let a few cleans up and bed baths get in your way. That's all it'll take to become comfortable with the whole ordeal that comes with being a nurse. Plus, as a previous poster said...think of it in a view of how you'd be so grateful to have someone there caring for you in ways you can't do for yourself. You'll be fine! Best of luck to you. :)

[Pneumothorax, BSN, RN]

thts the sucky part of the career, but nursing is so flexible..you dont have to be a bedside nurse, you can go into management or pediatrics, rehab, therapy, the list goes on for miles. Poop disgusts me, but after caring for a guy with C.Diff..i can eat a sandwich whilst inhaling the aroma... Vomit is disgusting..but after getting puked on...(it was my boot)...you get over it. You kinda have to.. We are in a position of caring for / and getting up close and personal with other people (patientss, family etc)..after awhile u stop looking at them as the old woman who smells like pee and wont stop defecating on a vent, and say..oh, gotta go clean up this little lady to prevent skin break down... you're thinking totally changes, at least mine has .:)

good luck to you :)

[sandyfeet]

The way I got over it was already mentioned but I think it bears repeating: imagining that this person I am cleaning is one of my parents. Both of my parents would be so horrified to be in a situation where they would need that kind of help, and would feel so ashamed and embarrassed, and would be so thankful for someone that acted like it was no big deal and smiled at them while giving them back a little dignity by getting them clean. For me, it is hard to focus on the gross stuff when I am thinking about their feelings, so it is a great distraction.

I think everyone goes through this. I am going through it again because I have OB this fall and I lost it when I saw a picture of a placenta in my textbook! I've never seen one before. But I will take my own advice, and when the time comes in clinical I will be thinking about the mother and the baby, and the miracle of life! :)

[lillymom]

Don't let this small thing stop you from doing what you want. You will have to accept the fact that people have to be changed and that you will have to deal with it.

There is usually something that completely grosses out all nurses but those things vary from nurse to nurse. You just have to go in there and get it done. I don't like assisting an MD who is lancing a subaceous cyst but I do it anyway.

You can ususally figure out tricks that will help you with getting the job done and it will get somewhat easier with time.

[NSGstudent12]

I think it's very normal! I mean who isn't grossed out by that at first?? Some ppl are grossed out by it all the time they just find ways to deal ha. I'm sure you will do fine! Plus when you graduate you can pick a specialty like pediatric or OB and not have to worry about mens butts!