Has Nursing hardened you?

OncRNMichelle · Apr 25, 2012

i'm curious: why go through with it if you know you're not going to like the work? seems like a waste of time and money to me, not to mention a valuable seat in class that other students would dearly love to have. there's nothing wrong with finding out that nursing is not for you---far better to realize it now than later when you're actually working as a nurse---but this sounds like a good time to cut your losses and figure out something you'd really enjoy doing. :)

[color=#ff00cc]my thoughts exactly! :rolleyes:

cbdavidson · Apr 25, 2012

Of course it has. It has greatly disappointed me in many ways.

1. The public perception of our knowledge, roles and the way we are treated.

2. The way physicians continue to dominate our destiny and roles. They actually promoted the growth of the PA industry over nurses prefering to train PAs for assistant tasks.

3. The way we are declared "professionals" but are treated as laborers. Our input is disregarded by management and those that leave for management abandon our ranks in every way.

4. The way ancillary staff have been able to take away areas of practice, such as pharmacy, physical therapy and the way less educated respiratory therapy departments. Pharmacy points the finger at med errors being predominantly the fault of nurses and have as a result initiated an intensely regulated for of dispensing and administration protocols. Physical therapy tends to treat nurses as their assistants and directs them to "follow these orders" rather than consult with the nurse to consider the whole patient whom they observe 24/7. Finally, repiratory therapy has taken over blood gas interpretation of treatment, management of ventilatory support and have even extended themselves into the cardiothoracic realm of hemodynamic monitoring which is completely absurd. They now set up the lines for PA lines and A lines which fell under nursing practice two and three decades ago. This has virtually led to the deskilling of the current generation.

5. Perhaps the most disappointing of all is the way nurses tend to "eat their own". I have never participated in that form of behavior and reject high-school girl type "clicks". It is very destructive to the profession and sad. I find that the best nurses and managers always move on...why shouldn't they, the predominant environment is so toxic.

Professionals, traditionally are highly educated, tested and endorsed (through examination and credentialing), independant contractors. Nurses are only called professional when they are to be held accountable. They are treated as unskilled laborers and they are disrespected. There is no incentive to become part of such a profession. In fact, I see a dying profession because nurses (RN, BSN, MSN, etc) are being replaced with "techs" who merely perform tasks and leave interpretation for physicians at their convenience. The fallout...delay in diagnosis, treatment and subsequently, a lot of bad outcomes.

Nursing has shot themelves in the foot for taking a passive role in their representation. They should unionize and take active roles in their professional associations in order to determine their profession's destiny rather than have it dictated by outsiders. Nurses are their own worst enemies.

I am one of the ranks, after 30 years ICU/Trauma who is leaving the profession...have just graduated from lawschool and the difference in the way I am now treated by my professional peers is profound! I will never look back.

Pinkmegan · Apr 25, 2012

I'm now entering my 26th year in nursing & it has not hardened me at all, in fact I get even more emotionally involved with patients than ever!

My eyes were opened when I did my training as I 'presumed' that all nurses would be lovely kind people! I found out on my very first clinical placement that this was far from the case! Not only were some off-hand & unkind to students but some were unkind, sometimes verging on cruel, towards patients! As most of the ward staff worked together on a regular basis some would even plan ways to deal with patients that they did not like! I hate myself, to this day, for not reporting the nurse who I saw slapping an elderly lady in the face. It was shameful but we all knew that we would be branded as 'trouble makers' & then given an even rougher ride!

Although I enjoyed most of my clinical placements I quickly knew that hospital nursing was not for me due to the poor standards, which existed in the NHS back then & which have not improved since! On qualifying I managed to get a post with a charity run high-dependency neuro unit &, other than a few years when I tried a new venture, which did not work out, I've been there ever since.

As all our patients are with us long term we build up relationships with them & with their families. Most of the families are lovely but we do still get some for whom we cannot do anything right! (Perhaps due to guilt at not being able to care for their relative??) Many of our patients are young (we take from 18yrs) and many of the history's are very sad. We have had young patients left brain-damaged due to elective surgery, some with genetic conditions which no one in the family was aware of, patients left paralysed due to RTAs and recently a young girl who tried to save her children from a house fire. The children all died and she has severe hypoxic brain damage.

We have a wonderful team of RNs and support workers who care for the patients as if they were their own family. It is impossible for most of not to get emotionally attached, myself included, and I have shed many thousands of tears over the years and still do so on a regular basis.

I always said that if the day ever came when I felt, for whatever reason, that I did not want to go to work, that would be the day that I would have to leave. This happened in 2005 when a new manager changed our rota patterns making home life difficult and also resulting in loss of income. I chose to leave &, with my husband, managed caravan parks for 8-9 months a year. After the first year, when not on site I went back to my previous employer on a relief basis. After 4 years of this I was missing nursing so much & felt that I was 'wasting' my hard-earned qualifications! Luckily a position became available & I was welcomed back. When I left I had been a charge nurse but now am happy to be just an RN!

You MUST enjoy what you do as a nurse. If you don't you can't do your best and the 'hardness' might creep in. When you qualify you need to find the job which is right for you!

There are still kind and caring nurses out there! If you are ever in the UK let me know & you can come & meet our team. Best of luck for your training. xxx

Bortaz, MSN, RN · Apr 25, 2012

On the contrary, nursing has SOFTENED me.

My prior career in law enforcement and state corrections had hardened me to where I could barely tolerate being around anyone. I was miserable, and I made those around me miserable...crappy attitude, no patience, angry all the time.

Deciding to change careers, and then deciding on NICU, were the best decisions I've ever made. NICU is stressful at times, but I'm so much more relaxed overall...more emotional regarding these babies...and just generally a better person than I was prior to starting this career.

OncRNMichelle · Apr 25, 2012

on the contrary, nursing has softened me.
my prior career in law enforcement and state corrections had hardened me to where i could barely tolerate being around anyone. i was miserable, and i made those around me miserable...crappy attitude, no patience, angry all the time.
deciding to change careers, and then deciding on nicu, were the best decisions i've ever made. nicu is stressful at times, but i'm so much more relaxed overall...more emotional regarding these babies...and just generally a better person than i was prior to starting this career.

exactly bortaz. i work in a prison right now (at least until mid-june) and it is difficult to maintain compassion for manipulating and malingering individuals. i've been here 2 years and have noticed a huge change in my attitude (not for the better). it's time to move on....and that's exactly what i am doing. i'm ready for some oncology!

JMederich · Apr 25, 2012

I'm also a nursing student and I have to say I have had a wonderful experience in school and at clinical. One thing that makes our class great is that everyone that has made it this far is really excited to learn. I've had a wonderful experiences with the nurses I am around (sometimes there are the grumpy ones that treat you like a student), but I just go in there and kill them with kindness. A big mistake some of my fellow classmates make is asking a nurse a million questions instead you should go and look it up first!.. Then ask your instructor. If you need to talk to a nurse don't start out with "I'm sorry to bug you but,..." because now your bugging them. Make eye contact when talking. When you are doing something be confident in yourself you know what you are doing. If a nurse asks you to go get coffee for a patient in 304 (even though they are not your patient) do it like the nurse just asked you to go start a Foley or an IV in 304. If you feel like these nurses have a bad attitude you can set an example as a student that your not an idiot and you are here to stay (sometimes they see it but sometimes they don't). We just finished up our first year at the hospital and my instructor asked for some feedback from the nurses and they said we were a great group and that they are confident we will make great nurses. They also thought we were seniors and we are freshman. I hope you are still finding nursing as a rewarding career. It also may be the hospital you are doing your clinical, maybe a transfer is needed.

It's actually a good thing you are experiencing a "cold" nurse. Now you know what not to be like. Don't get burnt out yet!

Bortaz, MSN, RN · Apr 25, 2012

In all my clinical rotations, I only ever had 1 nurse at the hospital that was in the least bit helpful to me. The rest of them handed me a MAR and promptly went about their business, leaving me to fend for myself with their patient. Many of them never entered the room of the patients to which I was assigned. I guess they figured I was there to relieve them since I was there anyway.

I asked my instructor if I needed knowledge, and asked my peers if I needed a hand.

The only people at the hospital that were glad to see us were the CNAs. They'd dance a little jig when we got there, happy that we'd be wiping the orifices and doing most of their work for a few hours.

MattNurse, MSN, RN · Apr 25, 2012

The only people at the hospital that were glad to see us were the CNAs. They'd dance a little jig when we got there, happy that we'd be wiping the orifices and doing most of their work for a few hours.

I would think after the first semester students should delegate to the CNA's if they are not busy. This is something new grads need to learn in school too. But I work nights and don't have students on my floor after 7pm.

trufflelilyRN · Apr 25, 2012

I have been an active RN for 40 years. Nursing has been good to me, and I have been successful. I do not feel nursing has hardened me, however I have developed a balance. I have learned and practiced how to establish professional relationships and how to end them. And, how to be empathic without becoming emotionally involved. Especially, how to be empathic without taking another person's "monkey on my back." I have watched young people die, cleaned up after sick drunks, been threatened by psych patients and fought with county commissioners about a community's needs (as a public health official). Am I hardened? NO. Am I savvey? You bet. Do I sniff out lazy nurses or malingerers? Yeah, duh, you could say so. I am 72 years old and work full time as a civilian Army Nurse. The work is physically and mentally challenging. Caring for the young, still-nearly-adolescent, scared, injured soldiers returning from combat requires much compassion, resolve, professionalism, self discipline and impeccable nursing skills. If you are having difficulty surviving in a controlled nursing school environment, do yourself, and the profession, a favor and find another line of work. You have not seen anything, yet.

Vespertinas · Apr 25, 2012

In all my clinical rotations, I only ever had 1 nurse at the hospital that was in the least bit helpful to me. The rest of them handed me a MAR and promptly went about their business, leaving me to fend for myself with their patient. Many of them never entered the room of the patients to which I was assigned. I guess they figured I was there to relieve them since I was there anyway..

If a SN is not seeking me out/avoiding me, I'll gladly take the hint. Instead I'll speak with your instructor to get information on your activity. I'm aware, don't worry.

Bortaz, MSN, RN · Apr 25, 2012

If a SN is not seeking me out/avoiding me, I'll gladly take the hint. Instead I'll speak with your instructor to get information on your activity. I'm aware, don't worry.

I'd like to believe you are representative of all nurses, but having worked as a nurse now for a few years, I know that you are not.

Most of the nurses that dump the patient on the student in med/surg is doing it because they need the relief from their too-large patient load, and grasp at any relief they can get. Well, the ones that care, at least. Some do it because they're lazy and unengaged.

As a student, even, it struck me that the nurse should be concerned about the care their patient was receiving from a student. They were still ultimately responsible for the patient. But to never even enter the room for the 5-6 hours the student was there?

Inconceivable to me, especially now as a working RN.

wanderlust99 · Apr 25, 2012

I think it's probably more likely ignorance on your part, rather than nurses are cold in general. No offense.

One time a patient's family member asked me if you become cold as a nurse. It was highly offensive to me because I think it's just the opposite. No one in their right mind would deal with what we deal with if they didn't have compassion and understanding at the core of who they are. And only a fellow nurse would really get what I mean.