grrr! gossiping, I cant stand it!!!

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Why do nurses have the need to gossip?? I cant stand it. Im a new grad started my new hob a month ago and already nurses are talking about me behind my back. why?? I know alot of nurses have dealt with this but what do they do? Im thinking of working registry so I dont have to deal with this! Need some advice!

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Specializes in Home Health, Geriatrics.

Sorry you are feeling this already. For some reason, some nurses like to back stab and gossip about others. Perhaps they are very insecure and feel like they need to put everyone else down in order to feel good about themselves. I have almost decided to wear a Kevlar vest to keep from getting stabbed in the back. I've been a nurse for a long time and have lots of scars. I don't get into the gossip and may be considered aloof because I don't participate in their griping sessions. I figure if they pick on me, perhaps they'll leave someone else alone. I am secure enough in my skills and personal growth that I don't worry about what they say anymore. I've learned that when you gossip and back stab, it comes back around and makes that person look worse than the one they were gossiping about. Please remember that there are good nurses out there. Keep away from these nurses and hang in there.;)

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Specializes in Critical Care.

Wherever you go, there will always be people who will talk ill about you. Trust me! Because I'm the kind of person who is being picked at since grade school! I really dont know why! Maybe there's something in me or something... Now that I graduated from nursing, someone told me that they love picking on me because I dont easily get mad! Then I started to fight back! Things got worse! hahaha... anyway.. I have a very strong personality, I know that!

First of all, try to assess why their doing that. Then if you can't find negative on yourself, try to ask someone! She might tell you something that might be helpful.

Second, easier said than done, try to ignore them! Sometimes it really works! If they think your not affected by what they're saying despite everything they said or do, they'll just pick on somebody else! And you can help that person how to overcome it! Until such time that these gossipers will just talk something else!

You see, people like them are insecure! To the extend that they'll put you down! They have personality issues, I tell you!

If you really can't take it anymore, APPROACH him/her! And oh by the way, you know what I do with what they're saying? I prove them wrong!

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Many reasons why nurses do this. You can't escape it. Going registry is not going to help. First, you need experience to be an agency nurse. When you walk onto the floor as agency, you are expected to function withou any help. Some places you will be lucky to have someone tell you where the restroom is. You will rarely have someone you can go to and ask questions of. I have seen agency nurses be listed as DNRs (do not return) because they asked too many questions. The staff is usually short, which is why you are there and they will say that you are a liability because you can't work without assistance. If you think the gossip and ugly treatment is bad now - wait till you make more money than a staff nurse and can make your own schedule. They will really dislike you then and will gossip, refuse to help you, and give you some of the worst assignments.

So, ready for agency nurse yet? The great thing about agency is that you can go home and pretend they don't exist. Plus the higher salary (often without any benefits) and making your own schedule. If you have friends outside of work and don't care whether anyone at work talks to you or not then you can make it. But most nurses need that camaraderie at work to feel good. Not everyone can handle being the outsider. As agency, you usually will be on the outside all the time.

So no matter what, you're just going to have to grow thicker skin because like or not - nursing has been this way forever and I haven't seen a hint of change. Agency has its perks for certain people, but be prepared because it isn't all glamor.

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People talked about Jesus Christ. He still died for them! Now, don't run yourself into the ground worrying about what others say or think about you.Take care of your patients and ignore them. You will experience gossip wherever you go. There is no escaping that. Good luck and God Bless!!

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Specializes in Community Health, Med-Surg, Home Health.

I have to chime in about the agency nursing. You have to be a totally independent person, and most times, it is true, they will not assist you, at least until they get to know you better. Gossip is a way of life for most people, no matter what the job setting. I just think it is worse in nursing because with lives on our hands, we still need to count on these people to sort of guide us through things that scare us for the first time.

As another poster said...just prove them wrong. Personally, I don't think confronting them makes a difference. It may set you up for a REAL arguement if the person is looking for a fight.

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Specializes in LTC, Med/Surg, Peds, ICU, Tele.
Why do nurses have the need to gossip?? I cant stand it. Im a new grad started my new hob a month ago and already nurses are talking about me behind my back. why?? I know alot of nurses have dealt with this but what do they do? Im thinking of working registry so I dont have to deal with this! Need some advice!

Gossip is actually social glue. I'm sure as soon as humans started speaking, gossip started. Right now you're the subject of gossip because you are low on the social ladder.

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Why do nurses have the need to gossip?? I cant stand it. Im a new grad started my new hob a month ago and already nurses are talking about me behind my back. why?? I know alot of nurses have dealt with this but what do they do? Im thinking of working registry so I dont have to deal with this! Need some advice!

Gossiping is everywhere not just in nursing. Just don't get caught up in it. That way they can never say you said "this" or "that".

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Specializes in ED, ICU, PACU.
I have almost decided to wear a Kevlar vest to keep from getting stabbed in the back.

I decided on my user name for the same reason :)

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Specializes in ICU, ER, EP,.

here is a different angle. With 12 years in, after the newbies are off orientation (ICU) I'm always watching (not for errors, to prevent them and stop you from sinking((will let you sink a tab bit and learn time management)) and making sure things are getting done.

Now if I'm not in charge I'll pull the charge aside (a newbie charge who I'm mentoring too) and say nurse so&so has spent alot of time in that room, or I"ve checked this nurses charting and it's behind. This nudges the charge to watch the newbie and send in reinforcements and delegate or check in themselves. If you were new, you may have heard me say these things about a buddy of yours. I'll even say to other nurses, let "sue try at least once to draw blood or start an IV before you do it for her, go in the room, but make her try".

You may hear a new charge nurse make negative comments and seems I approve, but I'll correct that out of earshot of others;)

Lastly, those of us who have years in together ride each other, nag each other, sometimes snap at each other. We talk trash to others, but we'll also do it to each others faces and we know it. It's not nasty and hurtfull, we're like siblings.

So there is a very different type of gossip, it's not all hatefull.. make sure what you're hearing truely is.

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Specializes in IM/Critical Care/Cardiology.

One way to prove them wrong is to ask to help them if you have the time. Kill em with kindness! Otherwise let it roll off your back. You are better and deserve better.

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Specializes in Critical Care.

hahaha.... your right sharona! I always do that! Killing them with kindness!!!!

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