My classmates are Jellyfish!!- Spineless

[justjenn]

I am sooo sick of my class. I don't go to school, I go to an aquarium surrounded by spineless jellyfish.

It seems that I am always made out to look bad. Ex. Today, we had a 5 chp. Med-Surg test & just came off of 2 days of team-nursing clinicals. Well, after Med-Surg we had pharm. Today, we were suppose to have a math-test (for daily grade). Before our instructor came in, I asked how many people's brains are fried & would like to see if we can take the math test on Monday? Some people raised their hands. So.....when the instructor came in, I told her that "we are worn-out & could we PLEASE!!! take the math test on Monday" She said she didn't realize we had a major test today & if that is what the rest of the class wants, it's ok w/her. WELL, wouldn't you know, everyone just stared at her w/a blank look on their face when she asked that. AND, 1 girl said, "can we take it today if we wanted too?" And she said sure. WELL, EVERYONE DECIDED TO TAKE IT :angryfire I felt like a dumb---! This isn't the first time something like this has happened.

I'M SICK OF MY CLASSMATES! It is sad, but when/if I graduate in August - I am not going into the transition RN program. I do not want to be stuck with these people again, I am going to do an online course.

I just needed to vent.

justjenn

[Energizer Bunny]

I don't get this either. We're supposed to watch how we're wording things and walk on egg shells because someone couldn't delay a scheduled test?

As other posters have pointed out, maybe a lot of people really didn't want to delay the test, and I wouldn't blame them. It is a pain to have to worry about and review the material all over again if you're prepared to take the test and want get it done on the scheduled date.

I'm kinda tired of this unwritten rule that all posts have to be "supportive."

Especially when we're not talking about a major crisis here.

No, it wasn't a major crisis, but apparently it was something important to the OP and that's what counts. (and once again, it wasn't "just" about the test) Should all of us that have a problem and are looking for support walk on eggshells and have to watch everything we say as well? Why can't everyone just be nice? Isn't that the point of this site? To support each other and when we disagree to at least be nice about it?

[Sheri257]

I wasn't trying to tear anyone apart. This is what I'm talking about. If you don't blindly agree with everything that's being said, you're accused of being mean, etc.

Some people don't like to delay tests. And some people don't like to speak up. I don't think they should be condemned for it.

If expressing a counter opinion is not "nice" enough, you guys must be easily offended.

My point was, "Don't sweat the small stuff." And this is definitely small stuff.

[RedSox33RN]

"My point was, "Don't sweat the small stuff." And this is definitely small stuff." But what is small to one person, may not be to another. We all need to remember that.

I think the OP was just more bugged that the people in her class agreed with her that it would be good to take it another day if they had the option, and then all backed out on her when she spoke up. That would PMO also.

If I were in her class, I would have preferred to take the test that day, but would have told her so, and not made her believe I would stand behind her when she said something to the professor.

I just didn't see the post as a "test this day or that day" but of the class saying one thing to her and then backing out in front of the professor.

Personally, yes, I prefer tests on the day I've got them scheduled for, and don't like postponing.

[jemommyRN]

I agree with Lizz. I come to this site to get HONEST opinions (not just support) about the issues that I deal with. I don't see it as "tearing someone apart" if you don't agree with the way they handled the situation. Sometimes people can make others "see" that they may be blowing things out of proportion (not saying that particularly in this case, cause I would be mad too) but in general. EVERYONE has a right to express their opinion and it doesn't always have to be supportive.

[KMSRN]

I am sooo sick of my class. I don't go to school, I go to an aquarium surrounded by spineless jellyfish.

You have just learned on of lifes hardest and most valuable lessons: most people are spineless jellyfish, some more than others. And a lot of them are stupid spineless jellyfish. (Just look at how easily people are swayed in the presidential elections.) They are also adult jellyfish and can stand up for themselves if need be. You are not here to save everyone or solve everyone's problems and part of the maturing/learning process is learning when you can help someone and when you can't. I also learned this the hard way. Try to focus on doing your best and let your classmates do the same. :)

[Sheri257]

I agree with Lizz. I come to this site to get HONEST opinions (not just support) about the issues that I deal with. I don't see it as "tearing someone apart" if you don't agree with the way they handled the situation. Sometimes people can make others "see" that they may be blowing things out of proportion (not saying that particularly in this case, cause I would be mad too) but in general. EVERYONE has a right to express their opinion and it doesn't always have to be supportive.

Thank you. I wasn't trying to be non-supportive either. I was merely stating an honest opinion.

Sometimes I think there's an unspoken formula that many expect to be followed: OP posts problem. Everyone expresses sympathy. End of the thread.

If you don't follow that formula, then you're mean and "tearing someone apart." Even though there's absolutely nothing in the posts to indicate that, except that you expressed an honest opinion and strayed from this formula that's supposed to be followed.

Unfortunately, honest opinions and different perspectives are not always encouraged here.

[jenrninmi, MSN, RN]

Thank you. I wasn't trying to be non-supportive either. I was merely stating an honest opinion.

Sometimes I think there's an unspoken formula that many expect to be followed: OP posts problem. Everyone expresses sympathy. End of the thread.

If you don't follow that formula, then you're mean and "tearing someone apart." Even though there's absolutely nothing in the posts to indicate that, except that you expressed an honest opinion and strayed from this formula that's supposed to be followed.

Unfortunately, honest opinions and different perspectives are not always encouraged here.

I don't think that's true at all. I just don't think your opinion needs to be so gruff. Honest opinions and different perspectives are ALWAYS encouraged here. I know many agree that there are certainly better ways of stating your "opinion".

[LauraF, RN, ASN, CNA, LPN, RN]

Lizz- I don't agree with you. I believe that is expected of this board is for us all to come together as nurses or nurses- tobe and have discussion. So you don't agree with the OP. You stated that. But I think what the others are trying to point out is that you may have missed the point of the thread. In no way are we all going to agree on everything. For goodness sakes we are all women. It's not going to happen. And I know that you were just pointng out another view, but it was more of an acusation rather then showing a different perspective.

OP- I understand your frustration with being asked to go to the instructors but then not getting the back up. I think in the future, maybe suggest they find another spokesperson. I was ready for a test one day and the instructor came in and said "Hey how would you like to have the test in two days." I was devasted. I was ready then. The day he wanted to have the test was a day I had planned not to be there, because it was my son's birthday. Good luck getting through school with these folks.

[Sheri257]

I didn't phrase things quite the way you guys would have liked? I could have said it nicer?

Alternative points of view are supposed to be encouraged, as long as I state my opinion the way YOU like it be stated. But I can't state my own point of view in my own words.

Gruff? Accusations? For crying out loud. If I really wanted to be gruff and level accusations, you'd read that plain as day.

All I said was that classmates have done lot worse things to fellow students, and I still don't think this is a big deal. Damn! How gruff and accusatory that is! How horrible!

Well go ahead and try to make yet another federal case over nothing.

I'll continue to speak for myself and in my own words, thank you very much.

[LauraF, RN, ASN, CNA, LPN, RN]

I didn't phrase things quite the way you guys would have liked? I could have said it nicer?

Alternative points of view are supposed to be encouraged, as long as I state my opinion the way YOU like it be stated. But I can't state my own point of view in my own words.

Gruff? Accusations? For crying out loud. If I really wanted to be gruff and level accusations, you'd read that plain as day.

All I said was that classmates have done lot worse things to fellow students, and I still don't think this is a big deal. Damn! How gruff and accusatory that is! How horrible!

Well go ahead and try to make yet another federal case over nothing.

I'll continue to speak for myself and in my own words, thank you very much.

Lizz- I am sorry. I went back and looked and the post with the accusations were from someone else. I apologize. I am not making a federal case over anything. I do believe that you are being rather harsh on the OP. They came here to vent, and maybe get a little support. Not to be one-upped or to have her feelings made trivial.

[klone, MSN, RN]

I've been on the internet for about 7 years now, and I've participated in MANY different message boards, and it's been my experience that more often than not, when you get a large group of women together, and especially when many of them haven't been around the 'net for very long, there will be a contingency of people who are of the opinion that any words of disagreement are "flaming" or "mean" (whew, that was a LONG sentence).

Lizz, I just wanted you to know that I agree with what you've written here. I've resigned myself to the fact that that's how it is, and there will be people who don't like me or how I say things (because although I don't get nasty, I do say what I think, even if it's perhaps not something the person wants to hear). There is only ONE place on the internet that I've found where people don't get offended by differing opinions or someone saying "I think you're wrong/overreacting/whatever" and these are people who, for the most part, have been participants of message boards for at least a couple years. After a while, you grow a thicker skin and realize that sometimes words without emotion or tone or expression can be misread, and you tend to not assign evil intentions to the author words that you maybe don't agree with. But I think it takes a few years of being on the 'net before that happens.

Anyway, those are my Sunday afternoon ruminations on 'net culture.

[jenrninmi, MSN, RN]

I've been on the internet for about 7 years now, and I've participated in MANY different message boards, and it's been my experience that more often than not, when you get a large group of women together, and especially when many of them haven't been around the 'net for very long, there will be a contingency of people who are of the opinion that any words of disagreement are "flaming" or "mean" (whew, that was a LONG sentence).

Lizz, I just wanted you to know that I agree with what you've written here. I've resigned myself to the fact that that's how it is, and there will be people who don't like me or how I say things (because although I don't get nasty, I do say what I think, even if it's perhaps not something the person wants to hear). There is only ONE place on the internet that I've found where people don't get offended by differing opinions or someone saying "I think you're wrong/overreacting/whatever" and these are people who, for the most part, have been participants of message boards for at least a couple years. After a while, you grow a thicker skin and realize that sometimes words without emotion or tone or expression can be misread, and you tend to not assign evil intentions to the author words that you maybe don't agree with. But I think it takes a few years of being on the 'net before that happens.

Anyway, those are my Sunday afternoon ruminations on 'net culture.

If only that were true. I've been participating in message boards for more than 4 years and I still get offended. I think it will also depend on the mood of the reader. There have also been many many times that people have found my posts rude also. It's irritating to say the least especially if I was just trying to be funny or try to calm things down or trying to stick up for someone else. So I can understand how lizz must feel when 3/4 of her posts people are telling her that she needs to be careful with what she's saying. But, that would tell me ok, maybe it's time for a break or maybe re-read my post before submitting it. That's just me though. :uhoh21: