Written Up...

  1. okay so today I went to work at the ER and about 3 hours into my shift one of the assistant managers comes up to me and asks if I have time. He sits me down and says that 2 nurses out of the 50+ I work with including days and nights said I was "borderline" rude. I asked to know who it was and he said a meeting would be set up later in the week and I would find out then.

    I'm really upset because I try to have a nice demeanor while working with people. It bothers me when people cannot come up to me and confront me to my face... I mean seriously if you talk to me I would have so much more respect for you than you going to admin about issues. *sigh* oo well.
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    About Okami_CCRN, ADN

    Joined: Oct '07; Posts: 816; Likes: 1,472


  3. by   Baloney Amputation
    What on earth do they think is "borderline" rude, and why is this grounds for writing you up?
  4. by   caliotter3
    If these two were so concerned with your demeanor and they had supervisory responsibility over you, they should have said something to you at the time. I would say this when you have the meeting. When you aren't told about something, that means it doesn't exist, or wasn't important enough to mention.
  5. by   nyteshade
    What a bunch of crap! They set meetings up for this stuff??!! "Borderline rude" and two people! They need to just throw this out of the window. The admin. apparently need to look busy if they persue this. I would not sign anything if they try to write you up on this.
    A similar incident happened to me: I was taken aside by the guy in HR one day, and was told that a CNA I worked with didn't feel I was friendly as evidenced by me not hugging and kissing her upon arrival (This was in Miami, by the way, it's a latin thing...). I'm Puerto Rican, but I don't just go up to people, and do that either, I like my space. Maybe it was the way I looked at him after the last word came out of his mouth, but I think he realized how he sounded, and sheepishly said, "well just try to smile more". Wow. So don't worry, silly complaints happen all the time.
  6. by   Daytonite
    i worked as a supervisor and manager in several facilities that addressed interpersonal behavior in its employees. in one place the rudeness and bullying among the staff was so bad that the nurses were told they could report it anonymously in order for it to be disclosed. you may think you have a nice demeanor, but that is not the way you are coming across to others. my advice is to go home, have a good cry and then approach any meetings about this with an open mind, positive attitude and a willingness to change and improve your behavior. be aware that any disclosure of the person(s) who reported your rudeness is probably going to handled as an intervention done in the presence of professionals, possibly a psychologist trained to deal with this kind of behavior and perhaps someone from human resources and nursing administration. you are likely to come away from the meeting angry if you are not willing to admit that you may have, indeed, been perceived as rude. if you decide to quit or get fired over this it might be hard to find a job in this economy. as they bluntly put it to rude employees at one place i worked (i actually sat in and heard this said to one nurse who argued that she had been wrongfully accused of being mean to someone), "if you want to stay employed here you need to change your demeanor right now or else find another place to work." the hair on the back of my neck stood up. that was when i knew they were serious about enforcing their new customer service policy.
  7. by   chicookie
    Don't even bother with that. Does it affect patient care that 2 nurses don't think you are nice? No, don't think so.

    I swear administrators sometimes let it go to their head. Getting written up for not being nice. Next thing you know, you are getting written up for not saying hello to someone. :selfbonk: How absurd!
  8. by   Daytonite
    i don't think this is something to ignore. some facilities see themselves as being in competition with other hospitals and if they are focusing on their staff being friendly with each other as a retention measure or a customer service policy i wouldn't sneer about it, especially when the people with the power have the ability to determine an employee's fate. if they want to make rules that say we all have to wear white or smile at each other then that is what we have to do to keep our jobs. it is that simple. beside, there are two sides to every story and we are only hearing one side so far.

    i found this recent post by the op:
    so... i transfered from my position as a cna on a med/surg floor to a tech position in the er about 3 months ago. i was so happy to transfer and now i have realized that the only people i get a long with are nurse's and techs that a) i knew from the floors and b) techs i knew from high school [most of the techs in the er were high school classmates... we're all around the same age]... there is so much favoritisim in the er that it makes me sick i mean the same nurses work triage over and over again which to them is a vacation compared to being assigned to the main er which is crazy... 40+ patients in bed at any time is crazy. i constantly get harassed by the nurses. . .
    it seems from reading this that there have been interpersonal issues all along and that getting reported is just a new development.
    Last edit by Daytonite on May 12, '09
  9. by   Miss Mab
    Yes, I do hate nursing.

    Oh wait, that was a different thread......

    Say, btw, my employer wants everyone to wear matching armbands while on duty. I don't wanna but, after all, the economy's bad and I need a job.
  10. by   mrsbiggy
    Where I work we all get along for the most part but I have had encounters with people, 2 in particular, one from another department and one nurse. The nurse is now gone because of her attitude and the other I went thru my DON because I wanted to go thru the chain of command. Mean nurses are everywhere, I am always shocked how some can be so nasty because we should all be there for the good of the patient but the saying "Nurses eat their young" is so true. I would look at this as a learning expierence, maybe it was a bad day and you were short with somebody, it happens but mgmt. has to address it because there were 2 complaints. Atleast they are giving you a heads up before you have to meet with these people. On the flip side, I have found a bad attitude is contagious, we all have bad days but we need to get along in order to work together effectivlely
  11. by   wonderbee
    If I were the manager, I would have offered a time to discuss the problem with all present behind closed doors to iron it it out. That might actually solve the underlying problem. Get everyone talking. This way the problem doesn't get solved. Writing people up for this kind of pettiness is a big waste of time. Give a verbal warning, then do the write up if the behavior continues.
  12. by   Schmoo1022
    Are they saying you were borderline rude to patients or the nurses? I think it makes some difference. I was always told, and please don't bite my head off, that because the E.R. is such a high stress area that you do what needs to be done quickly and sometimes you may be a bit abrupt. That doesn't always leave time to have tea and scones with your coworkers.
  13. by   bluemartian
    To the OP, sounds like one of those toxic floors where you work with the stepford wives ( or persons), If one doesnt like you then all of sudden the whole floor dislikes you. But on the otherhand you need to find out what is meant by borderline rude? I was accused of being too conversant with patients which would force me to abruptly stop my conversations which at least on my part I viewed as rude. I was reprimanded and told not to let patients and their conversations waste my time. Its all a perception.
  14. by   tencat
    It seems to me that if you are going to discipline an employee for an infraction you should have concrete and specific incidents to back up the need for discipline. "Borderline rude" or 'bad attitude' doesn't describe an incident. Now if they have an actual incident with specifics, then they might have a case. I also think that people ought to work it out among themselves first before dragging administration into it. Maybe those lodging the complaint did try to work it out before hand, but OP makes no mention of it. There are always two sides to every story, and it would be interesting to know the other side.

    I really don't think we should all ask 'from which bridge?' when our employer says 'go take a flying leap' just because it's a tough economy and we are 'lucky' to have a job. Some jobs aren't worth having.....