Hi everyone. I haven't posted much, but I read posts everyday and have seen the incredible amount of support this board can provide. I am in the process of a financial aid appeal at my local college. I would like some honest opinons on my letter and possible some suggestions of how I could make it better. The letter is kind of long, so I would understand if noboby want to read it
Thanks in advance
Dear Appeal Committee,
I am writing this letter to appeal my financial aid suspension. I would like to begin thanking all of you in advance for taking the time to read this letter and consider my request to receive financial aid at .... First, I will explain my educational goals. I plan to apply to and hopefully enter the nursing program in fall of 2005. Meanwhile, I will complete all of the general education classes required for a degree in nursing. This timeline will enable me to take the time to focus on a relatively small number of classes each semester and achieve an excellent grade in each class. Although I must admit that becoming a nurse has not always been a dream of mine, I now realize that nursing is my "calling" and I am determined to do whatever is necessary to achieve this goal.
The first time I enrolled in a class at ... was fall semester of 1999. Shortly after the class began, my employer offered me a promotion and substantial raise. I decided to accept the position as a supervisor, as it was a great opportunity. Shortly after beginning my new position, I became overwhelmed by all of the extra hours at work, the responsibility of being a single parent, and my college class. At that time I made the decision to withdraw from the class. Unfortunately, I had no idea the impact that this decision would have on my future at ....
Two years later, I was laid off and searching for a new job. I began two classes at ... and shortly after, found a good paying job. Although this job paid well, it was very stressful and they soon required mandatory overtime from all of their employees. I decided to withdraw from one of my classes and try to juggle the rest of my responsibilities. I eventually stopped attending the second class causing me to receive a failing grade in that class. I regret that decision and now wonder if I could have managed to be successful in school had I used better time management skills.
Since I was not receiving Financial Aid either of the times I enrolled at ..., I was unaware that these choices would cause me to lose the opportunity for financial assistance in the future. My situation has changed greatly since I attended classes at .... I am now married and my husband supports my goal to become a RN. He will provide for our family financially and support me in any other way necessary to achieve my goal. Although I have made mistakes regarding my education in the past, I am now willing and able to focus on my schooling. College is now a priority in my life and an essential part of my future.
Thank you again for considering my appeal.
Jul 31, '03
Good message. It may work. It has real merit andis worthy of consideration. I strongly agreee with the posters who said, shorten it, remove all negative elements, and edit the heck out of it for grammmar, sentence structure unnessary verbage etc.
Now, you still may not get it. So here is what you do. Go back and repeat those classes. Yep, it sounds harsh and sometimes that is what it takes. Even if they turn you down with this appeal if you repeat at least some of those classes you WILL be back in thier good graces. You could just take your pre nursing classes and use those to raise your standing but repeating the failed and dropped classes will work faster.
Talk to an acedemic advisor or counselor to see if you can raise your standing fast enough by just taking more classes and doing well, without repeating the dropped and failed classes.
In anycase if you have a failure that will always continue to pull down your standing; better to retake that one at least.
P. S. your paragraphs should be no more than 4-5 lines.
Last edit by Agnus on Jul 31, '03