The Things Patients Say & Think....Oh My!

Nurses General Nursing

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Specializes in OB, M/S, HH, Medical Imaging RN.

A patient was in alot of pain. They said this cannot be a kidney stone, it just can't be, it's impossible. I said why?

Because I've had 2 kidney stones before and both of them occured in the month of November and this is February, don't you understand? Oh my.

I said umm no...the truth is that a kidney stone doesn't not know or doesn't not care what month it is, what time it is, or anything else, when it's ready to move...it moves. Yes, this patient did have a kidney stone. :rolleyes:

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Ok that really made me laugh. Thanks.:yeah: The things people come up with.

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Specializes in Community Health, Med-Surg, Home Health.

I once had a very classy, articulate English speaking woman actually ask me "What is the flu??" when I told her that there was an order for a flu shot and if she had any allergy to eggs. Somehow, this got to me, and I gave her literature and told her to go home and think about it.

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Specializes in M/S, dialysis, home health, SNF.

It isn't just patients. I actually worked with a dialysis tech who told a patient not to blow their nose too hard because they could blow out some of their brains.

And yes, she believed this!

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Specializes in ICU/ER.
It isn't just patients. I actually worked with a dialysis tech who told a patient not to blow their nose too hard because they could blow out some of their brains.

And yes, she believed this!

Wow I learn something new every day!!!! hahaha...Love it!

We had an 80something year old woman watch a teaching video about colostomy wear and care and at one point in the video the lady was water skiing. Our patient said "Oh dear, I never could water ski"

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Specializes in ER, ICU, Prehospital.

One time I had a patient tell me he didn't want to get into the ambulance because he insisted he was hydrophobic. I knew what he meant but it was still funny. Then once we convinced him to ride with us to the hospital he insisted on riding in the front seat and not being buckled in his seatbelt. Needless to say he ended up not getting a ride with us. Humorous but sad because he really did need to be seen in the ER. Maybe he drove himself unrestrained...

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Specializes in ED tech on a resp. therapist adventure.

I had a neighbor tell my mother that her dying daughter was on "100% oxygen!". I Wanted to tell her that oxygen that comes out of the tank is 100% oxygen, it is the number of liters they are on that varies..... (unless there is something that I do not know about oxygen and if there is I am sure someone will let me in on it...) Peace..

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Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
i had a neighbor tell my mother that her dying daughter was on "100% oxygen!". i wanted to tell her that oxygen that comes out of the tank is 100% oxygen, it is the number of liters they are on that varies..... (unless there is something that i do not know about oxygen and if there is i am sure someone will let me in on it...) peace..

icu nurse here: there is something you don't know about oxygen. it is quite possible to have 100% oxygen (or nearly so) on a mask or ventilator. not possible with a nasal cannula, which is probably what you're used to.

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Specializes in Med-Surg.

This actually came out of the mouths of the patients family members. The patients twin sisters (in their 70s) called me into the room, the patient was asleep. They ask me "Why is she sleeping?" My response-because she's tired! "But why? Is it medication, is it the needles?" "She's sleeping because she's tired, that all." (the patient was not on any meds that would make her drowsy, whether intentional or as a side effect). Then they as me when she will wake up. She will wake up when she's not tired anymore! I just stood there baffled, their sister is sleeping because she's tired, there's really not much to do in the hospital. This just cracked me up. Great thread!

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I had my OB pt tell me recently that she was allergic to glucose. She said that she had thrown up the drink the gave her for her GTT, and that I was to be very careful if I gave her any glucose. I gently corrected her about her "allergy' and had a good laugh afterwards! Sometimes, you hear the darndest things!:wink2:

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Specializes in Community, OB, Nursery.

"My [newborn] baby is crying." Ummmm, yes......

Mind you, these were not first-time parents, not by a long shot.

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Specializes in Acute Care, Rehab, Palliative.

I had a pt tell me he was once on "vino-barbie-dolls". I think the word he was looking for was phenobarbitals.

:lol2:

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