Oh boy......I ticked off the charge nurse

[newish nurse]

I am currently participating in an evening clinical, on a med/surg floor. This is my second quarter; my previous clinical was in a LTC. I am really excited (and nervous) to be in school, as this is a career change for me. I always have made sure to thank all of the nurses and/or techs that I work with, and understand how important it is to maintain a good relationship with the facility the students are assigned to. Anyway......the other night I was standing next to the nurse I was assigned to, listening as she received report from the day nurse. When they got to my patient, there was a comment made about a procedure. Our instructor has encouraged us to ask questions about things we aren't familiar with, so I asked "what is a ...". (I had already introduced myself to the nurse, identified which patient I had been assigned to, and she seemed open to sharing information). There was another nurse, with her back to us that turned quickly towards the group, and said "don't answer that, make her look it up". I chuckled, and said "of course I have to look it up". That was the entire exchange, but it turns out that nurse was the charge nurse, and she complained to my instructor about my response. So, even though I meant NO disrespect what so ever, she was certainly ticked off. I couldn't have been more shocked when my instructor held me over after class, and told me this. At this point I explained the situation to the instructor, and guaranteed that I would apologize to the charge nurse. My intention was to simply ask to speak to her in private, and offer a sincere apology. Not because I am trying to get out of trouble with my CI, but a real apology, as I never meant any disrespect, and appreciate the opportunity that working on her floor presents to me. My question is......would it be better to do this one on one, or would it be better to have a witness? If I ticked her off enough to have her report me to my CI, do you think it wise for me to talk to her alone? Odds are that I will be back at that hospital in the future, and I want to offer the apology, and lay low for the rest of the quarter. What do you suggest?

[Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN]

What do you suggest?

Asking any questions, after report is finished, no interrupting, and refrain from smart-orificed replies.

[Mississippi_RN]

Maybe its just me.. and maybe you just had to "be" there... but I don't take what you said as being a smart-a**. I mean, "I" can be one of the biggest smart-a**es there have ever been, but all you did was really agree with her. She, on the other hand, was being that five-letter word that means a female dog. There was no reason she could not have just gave a short description of the procedure, to just familiarize you with it to work with the patient that day, and then told you to look it up for the details. Actually, if she was going to be such a booty about it, she could have just kept her mouth shut.

[PhoenixGirl]

I once ticked off a nurse at a facility we were doing clinical at. The nurse made some comment about how GWB was the greatest president we'll ever have. And it was this reflex, I made a face. And she looked at me and was like "watch it! your just a student." In this nasty way. My clinical instructor was this really laid back type and I told her about it because I actually thought it was funny. I didn't say a word, all I did was make a face and what she said to me was actual verbal rudeness. My instructor just said to ignore it, we can't pls them all. What matters is your doing good in your program. your probably going to piss nurses and people off everywhere u go because some are more uptight than others.

[Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN]

I chuckled, and said "of course I have to look it up".

It's not what was said, it's how it was said.

We were always told in clinical to ask any questions after report's over, not during.

[Antikigirl, ASN, RN]

I ask questions all the time, and it is encouraged where I work if I don't know something! I am agency and have been a nurse for 6 years returning to hospital after 4 in ALF. So sure, I have questions...and a short explanation and I look it up when I can (knowing me I go home and do research still so I remember for the next time!).

You are just learning, me I have to remember all those things 6 years ago I haven't worked with in a long time...but still...I would encourage someone to speak up and be honest they don't understand or know! I would be happy to teach them! I was there one day long ago, still am now with some of the terms used with surgeries and procedures (they changed a bit..LOL!).

Wow, that charge nurse must not be student friendly at all. This is your learning stage...yeah sure you are going to ask questions and it is a sign of studenthood, responsiblity and professionalism to always ask if you don't know something..heck patients are on the line!

I really wouldn't appologize..you did NOTHING wrong! Just be very careful around that nurse, and really do your homework on your patients when you get your assignments (I was able to look them up the night before and study up...). If you have questions, ask a trusted nurse away from patients but in private...let them know you plan to look it up so you remember it better (always a plus) but a quick bit would be helpful so you can continue with your tasks till you can.

So remember, you did NOTHING wrong...you are a student gaining experience and infomation for being a nurse in the future...I say ask away, just do it knowing that the potential for some folks to simply say "look it up" is there. Especially if you ask TON's of questions, avoid that!

[RazorbackRN, BSN, RN]

I ask questions all the time, and it is encouraged where I work if I don't know something! I am agency and have been a nurse for 6 years returning to hospital after 4 in ALF. So sure, I have questions...and a short explanation and I look it up when I can (knowing me I go home and do research still so I remember for the next time!).

You are just learning, me I have to remember all those things 6 years ago I haven't worked with in a long time...but still...I would encourage someone to speak up and be honest they don't understand or know! I would be happy to teach them! I was there one day long ago, still am now with some of the terms used with surgeries and procedures (they changed a bit..LOL!).

Wow, that charge nurse must not be student friendly at all. This is your learning stage...yeah sure you are going to ask questions and it is a sign of studenthood, responsiblity and professionalism to always ask if you don't know something..heck patients are on the line!

I really wouldn't appologize..you did NOTHING wrong! Just be very careful around that nurse, and really do your homework on your patients when you get your assignments (I was able to look them up the night before and study up...). If you have questions, ask a trusted nurse away from patients but in private...let them know you plan to look it up so you remember it better (always a plus) but a quick bit would be helpful so you can continue with your tasks till you can.

So remember, you did NOTHING wrong...you are a student gaining experience and infomation for being a nurse in the future...I say ask away, just do it knowing that the potential for some folks to simply say "look it up" is there. Especially if you ask TON's of questions, avoid that!

I wouldn't really drown her in my sorrow either, she should be more understanding of students and be glad that you are participating in report rather than sitting like a knot on a log.

I would say something to the effect of "I apologize if you took my remark as disrespectful, I didn't mean it that way at all".

[Daytonite, BSN, RN]

Hi, In_School!

I'm kind of on your side for this one. This got blown way out of hand. Some of the more experienced nurses will make the same kinds of comments to posters on the nursing student assistant forums as well. It's one thing to be blunt and put someone in their place, especially when they deserve it (which I don't think is the case here) and quite another to respond to a question like yours with tact and ingenuity. As for me, I would have just assumed that the question just sort of dropped out of you because that kind of thing has happened to me plenty of times. Unless your instructor is telling you to apologize to this charge nurse I would just act like it never happened if you're around her again. I think it's likely to set her off again and you definitely don't need that. She did what she felt was her duty. That deserves no apology from you. I happen to think that the way she handled this was wrong and she doesn't need to be rewarded with an apology. On the other hand, don't feel that you have to justify everything you say. Sometimes, when you realize you've said something that maybe you shouldn't have, the best response is to just clam up unless you are asked a question about what you said. In this case it probably would have been better if you had said nothing back to her--she obviously has some issues with being an authoritarian and will not tolerate anyone questioning her little picayune decisions. Let her wallow in her delight at having been able to tattle on you to your instructor and cause you some aggravation--what a b***ch! One of the problems of dealing with some females in positions of supervision is that they don't know how to successfully confront and deal with behavior they disagree with in others. If this charge nurse had a problem with the way you responded to her, she should have taken you aside after report and spoken with you. I have worked hard not to be this kind of wishywashy leader my whole career. You didn't really mention what your instructor had to say about this, but I imagine she had her own thoughts on this as well and you don't mention what she had to say to you about it. Let it go. This charge nurse has problems with her own authority. Make a promise to yourself not to treat others in this disrespectful way because I assure you that as an RN you will find yourself in similar positions of authority.

[MultipurposeRN]

That charge nurse sounds like a hag....it's much quicker to ask questions than to look something up. It wouldn't have hurt anything to give a brief description and have you look it up later. If students had to stop and look EVERY little thing up, they'd never have time to do patient care.

I used to teach clinicals, btw. I answered lots of questions and so did the staff where I taught. I also made students look stuff up. Sometimes I learned things from them I wasn't familiar with!

That Charge nurse owes YOU an apology for over-reacting, IMO.

[MMARN, BSN, RN]

It's obvious you did nothing wrong. However, some people have a different sense of humor. I would have taken it as a joke, and kept going. Personally, I would have waited until after report was over b/c if the procedure was something complicated, they would have to go into details and it would have taken longer to give report. However, I don't understand the charge nurse's attitude. She was a student first, and she should understand that you are curious. But, take this as a lesson, learn from it, and keep going. Don't dwell on this. Good luck.

[suzy253, RN]

Personally, I don't see where you did anything wrong.

[kellyo, LPN]

Asking any questions, after report is finished, no interrupting, and refrain from smart-orificed replies.

Yay, Marie!!!! Klinger's back!!!!!