Nurse and patient

  1. As a nurse I have something to say. Yes I am a nurse but no, I do not know it all and I know my limitations. I am a nurse and currently I am pregnant.

    As a pregnant nurse I am also a patient. I have not been very happy with my patient experience. Currently I am having an internal struggle and nightmares about my pregnancy. I started having contractions early (5 months), and my Dr was on medical leave (health care providers are not immune), the Dr I was seeing had me comparing this pregnancy to my last 2 (over 10 years before) and had me scared for the health of my baby. Here’s the important part; because I am a nurse she spoke to me of evidence based practice and treatments that have changed in the 10 years I have been raising my 2 premie children. I of course need guidance, I am not an OB nurse, so I listened. When my Dr returned from medical leave he chastised and belittled me for exaggerating. I was not the one that started the concern it was his colleague. Anyway, I had planned on changing Dr’s because no one treats me like an idiot, but in talking with several professionals was told that if something did go wrong he was the Dr to have. So even being unhappy I have stayed with him. Now before I was chastised I had had a rough shift and the contractions were constant and not weak to me. At the advice of my co-workers I went to our ER after going home and drinking at least a liter of water. Once again I was chastised for knowing better (how important water is to a pregnant woman) and told not to return to the hospital unless my water breaks or I'm bleeding. Now I have to admit he was right, this baby isn't coming early, now I'm in the 37th week. The contractions have continued not real regular all the time and if I lay down they don't really bother me. Here's the purpose of writing this: I had a nightmare last night that the baby died because I was waiting for the bleeding and/or my water to break. (Somewhere in here I should have mentioned I have a pretty high pain threshold and can deal with pain just by focusing on something else.)

    This nightmare has shaken me to my core… I'm scared that I'm going to wait too long to go to the hospital and hurt my baby. And all because of my experience as a patient. Are all pregnant women treated this way or just me because I am also a nurse?
  2. Visit tmremramr profile page

    About tmremramr, BSN, RN

    Joined: Sep '13; Posts: 21; Likes: 21
    RN
    Specialty: 4 year(s) of experience in Telemetry

    8 Comments

  3. by   nrsang97
    I would say that if you feel that you need to be seen next time go to OB triage. They will evaluate if you are in labor or send you home. Did you have a complicated pregnancy with your first 2 children? I cannot give advice except for, if you feel something is wrong then you should be seen. Trust your gut, because you know your body best.

    Sounds like your doctor does not have the best bedside manner. I think they didn't do much of the teaching they need to do because you are a nurse and they assume you know all this already. While working it can be hard to get all the water in you need to and take adequate meal breaks.
  4. by   Orion81RN
    Omg, how terrible. PLEASE don't let him keep you from going to the hospital if you feel you even might need to just in fear of being chastised. What an a-hole. You are a patient/mom first. Nurse second, and not even an OB one at that. What an A-hole!
  5. by   tmremramr
    Both of my first pregnancies barely made 32 weeks...and I have trouble counting contractions since I'm not in a lot of pain. I'm just constantly uncomfortable but if I have something to do I can even ignore that. I'm really worried about not going when I should and it being too late. Thanks for your reply...
  6. by   tmremramr
    Quote from Orion81
    Omg, how terrible. PLEASE don't let him keep you from going to the hospital if you feel you even might need to just in fear of being chastised. What an a-hole. You are a patient/mom first. Nurse second, and not even an OB one at that. What an A-hole!
    And I acknowledge I need their expertise....I don't pretend we nurses are all the same!
  7. by   mmc51264
    I hope all goes well for you! I know what you mean about being treated as thought because you are a nurse, you know it all. I am an orthopedic nurse. I don;t know anything about other things that have been issues with me. I had weight loss surgery and that is totally out of my comfort zone. I am also the parent of two Type 1 children. I am pretty well versed in diabetes, but when my son went into severe DKA, I didn't know what was going on. I needed them to explain things to me. And I had to press to ask questions. they just assumed I knew how to treat acute DKA. Which I do not.
    It is scary being on the other side and not knowing. Best of Luck to you!!!!
  8. by   Lauraingalls
    Sorry your doc is making you feel guilty. As a. Labor nurse, I reassure lots of patients who come in to our triage wondering if it's labor. We would rather you keep bothering us then showing up crowning.
    Generally if you are having cx 2-3 minutes apart and can't talk, text or move when they occur it's time to come in. Good luck! Happy Birthing!
  9. by   Pixie.RN
    Quote from tmremramr
    Both of my first pregnancies barely made 32 weeks...and I have trouble counting contractions since I'm not in a lot of pain. I'm just constantly uncomfortable but if I have something to do I can even ignore that. I'm really worried about not going when I should and it being too late. Thanks for your reply...
    I have a low threshold for calling L&D with questions, and a lower threshold for just going in to be seen. I have been having a lot of Braxton-Hicks, but they typically (not always, but typically) subside with lying down. But I have gone in to be seen for decreased fetal movement a few weeks ago, without hesitation, reservation, or shame. She wasn't making her kick counts and I was contracting way more than usual, and I have enough complications to warrant concern. Of course, once I got there she beat the crud out of everything strapped to my belly, and we had a good laugh about that. But I would go in again in an instant if she didn't make kick counts again. I wouldn't even call at this point! I met with the L&D charge and anesthesia yesterday because I have a scheduled delivery coming up, and the charge nurse told me that at this point, if I think anything is weird or if my contractions get closer that 5 mins apart or if I think my water breaks, just come in. I like hearing info because I am NOT an L&D nurse, we don't like delivering in the ER, and I am outside my realm of expertise here. Not all nurses know all types of nursing!! Though I was allowed to manage my gestational diabetes by myself, lol. I did a pretty good job, too!

    Your anxiety is understandable, I think we all go through this. Use your resources and get the answers you need. Hang in there, mama!
  10. by   TriciaJ
    I'm so sorry your providers are being crappy to you. That you have to be wracked with anxiety when a little reassurance would go a long way. As far as expecting you to know everything because you are a nurse:

    A couple of years ago I went to a telephone triage conference. Some of the participants were seasoned telephone triage nurses. They told me it is not unusual to receive calls from pediatricians wanting advice about their own kids. I had trouble believing that, but several of them nodded their heads and said yes, that is true. Apparently when it's you and yours, even your own expertise doesn't cut it. You want to be reassured by someone else.

    So don't let these people intimidate you. Remind them that 1. OB is not your thing 2. You have a history of high-risk pregnancies. 3. You'd like a little reassurance because you didn't sign up for a load of crap.

    Hope it all goes smoothly from here and soon you will be holding your happy, healthy new baby.

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