How much death do you see/ have you seen on the job?

[CaffeinePOQ4HPRN, BSN, MSN, LPN, RN]

How much death do you see/ have you seen on the job?

I know this varies depending on your area of practice... For example, a Nurse working in an MDs office vs. Acute Care/Trauma. Nevertheless, I am just curious as to how many Nurses on this forum have witnessed/experienced death on the job in their careers, how it affects them, what keeps them going? A professor I had in nursing school admitted that she had never experienced the death of a patient in her entire career; and that she purposefully avoided working in areas/specialties where death would be at an increased likelihood.

She explained that she wouldn't be able to cope with "all that day-in day-out death" for the long-term... and I agree with her because I feel a similar way after witnessing/experiencing a lot of deaths in my career. I used to work in palliative care. I did that for many years and was good at it, but left because it became too much.

[AliNajaCat]

Many, many, many. First was when I was a 16-year-old anesthesia wench in a summer job and helping out in the ER and OR. But that was nearly 50 years ago. I had more than 20 years in critical care. The last one I witnessed was my father about 10 years ago.

Death isn't the problem for a lot of people; it's the suffering that gets to you, either the patient's or the family's. So many deaths, like my dad's, are not unexpected and are an absolute blessing. But one of his grandsons (not my kid) was absolutely hysterical.

The hospice people say that every death make you remember all the previous ones; I don't remember ALL of them, but I do remember the ones in my family. And now, when we're older, I find myself attending a funeral, as I did this week, and wondering what it will be like when it's me burying my sweet beloved. That makes me very, very sad. But it doesn't stop it from approaching. And it makes me appreciate every damn day I have with him.

[CaffeinePOQ4HPRN, BSN, MSN, LPN, RN]

Death isn't the problem for a lot of people; it's the suffering that gets to you, either the patient's or the family's.

Precisely!

[TheCommuter, BSN, RN]

I spent the first six years of my nursing career in long term care, a.k.a. the nursing home industry. I do not have enough fingers and toes to count the number of dead residents I have seen over the years.

Since I am somewhat emotionally detached, their deaths did not really have a substantive impact on me. I would be an emotional basket case if my parents, best friend, or other loved one were to die. However, the death of a patient usually does not haunt me.

It is all about having a degree of comfort with one's personal views on death and dying. Also, robust boundaries are important to have. To me, death is not the worst thing that could happen to a person by a long shot.

[CaffeinePOQ4HPRN, BSN, MSN, LPN, RN]

I spent the first six years of my nursing career in long term care, a.k.a. the nursing home industry. I do not have enough fingers and toes to count the number of dead residents I have seen over the years.

Since I am somewhat emotionally detached, their deaths did not really have a substantive impact on me. I would be an emotional basket case if my parents, best friend, or other loved one were to die. However, the death of a patient usually does not haunt me.

It is all about having a degree of comfort with one's personal views on death and dying. Also, robust boundaries are important to have. To me, death is not the worst thing that could happen to a person by a long shot.

Death is a part of the life cycle. It's inevitable and I accept it. I find the overall experience (of taking take of actively dying patients and their mourning families) to be draining in a way that is not sustainable for me. My father and I both shared the same rational views on death. Before he died he said this to me: "The only people who miss the dead are the living".

Death is not the distinct issue here. Not the physical death of a patient, but all that comes along with it and having to face that as a part of your job all day everyday. The burnout rate of nurses on our unit was pretty high, esp. for turnover. Palliative care is sometimes a slow crawl towards the end, and the ongoing cries leading up to it (of the patient, friends, family)... I just couldn't anymore. Palliative care nurses are amazing, I just know I could never be one of them ever again.

I don't experience deaths in my current nursing role.

[Been there,done that, ASN, RN]

Dealing with death is part of many nurse's job, sounds like you saw way too much of it. Time to move away from it.. and that's okay.

I attended many patients in the active dying process. I hospiced my best friend and my father... and watched them die.

I feel death is ugly and hope to never witness another one.

Best wishes in your new endeavors.

[Sour Lemon]

I've seen it quite a bit. At my first med/surg job out of school, I frequently had extubated patients who were transferred to the floor just to finish dying. In the four years since then, I've only seen it a couple of times.

I'm largely not affected, because like commuter, I agree that it's often not the worst outcome. I actually feel worse for the people who hang on by a thread for years and years.

I do feel a moment of sadness when I have to "pronounce" a death, because it feels like an official separation from that person and everything they loved. It takes about thirty seconds for me to move on and get back to business, though.

[Here.I.Stand, BSN, RN]

I work in a critical trauma unit, so see quite a bit of death. Honestly what's harder for me is performing neuro checks, ET and subglottic suctioning, tubefeeding which results in caustic liquid BM, and all that jazz for a patient who will have ZERO quality of life.

[Luckyyou, BSN, RN]

Off the top of my head, I can think of 11 patients, from a few hours old to 18, that I have lost this year. I'm sure it's more than that, but if I carried all of them around in my head, I couldn't do this job anymore. Build walls. It doesn't make you a bad person, it's self care. Do this long enough and you realize that there are a hundred things worse than death. Those are the patients I can't forget, and the ones I apologize to in my head when I can't sleep at night.

[verene, MSN]

I most recently worked hospice and it was not unusual for me to average a patient loss a week. I once had 3 out of my 4 patients die in one shift.

The fact that the patients and their families weren't MY loved one's let me keep a certain amount of distance. Working in hospice there is a lot of emotion: anger, sadness, grief, and pain. But there is also a lot of the positive emotions as well. I kept sane because I held onto the moments of laughter, of smiles, of silly jokes, and pure joy.

I liked the pace of the work in hospice, the ability to really dig in to deeper psychosocial, emotional and spiritual issues, and to be able to focus on providing compassionate care for people in their last weeks, days, and hours. I liked that focus of care was on comfort over procedure. Working in that environment was very comfortable for me, and I generally looked forward to my days at work. I think it helped that I had an excellent team to work with and management who made all of us feel supported and cared for.

I think what also allowed me to feel comfortable was that in that role and in that environment death was completely expected. It was accepted and welcomed. Which meant that I didn't need to devastated by it - my job was to make death as welcoming and approachable as possible.

I haven't experienced any deaths or dying patients since leaving that position to start nursing school and I don't know if I will feel that same ease with patient death in other settings where death is not welcomed but something to be fought against. I also wonder how well I would deal with a death in my personal life. I suspect that neither would be easy for me, and I may actually have a more difficult time with some parts of the dying process now than I would if I hadn't spent time as a hospice volunteer and CNA.

[Rose_Queen, BSN, MSN, RN]

I've seen a handful in my years as an OR nurse. The majority of them were trauma patients that, like Humpty Dumpty, just couldn't be put back together again. Some of the others (and actually some of those trauma patients) were organ donor surgeries. The remainder are those that were emergent surgeries for conditions with extremely high morbidity- aortic dissections, saddle PE, etc. One was a cath lab complication where the ventricle was perforated- the patient exsanguinated into his chest before we could get the chest open and the hole patched. How do I cope? By knowing that we can't save them all. For those that are extremely traumatic, the hospital does offer debriefing sessions. When debriefing sessions aren't planned, staff is still welcome to speak with one of the chaplains.

[Rose_Queen, BSN, MSN, RN]

I spent the first six years of my nursing career in long term care, a.k.a. the nursing home industry. I do not have enough fingers and toes to count the number of dead residents I have seen over the years.

Since I am somewhat emotionally detached, their deaths did not really have a substantive impact on me. I would be an emotional basket case if my parents, best friend, or other loved one were to die. However, the death of a patient usually does not haunt me.

It is all about having a degree of comfort with one's personal views on death and dying. Also, robust boundaries are important to have. To me, death is not the worst thing that could happen to a person by a long shot.

Wish I could like this more than once. I'm the same- clinical boundaries for patients, major emotional impact for close friends and family.