Advice needed

Nurses General Nursing

Published

I have recently turned in my 2 weeks notice. I wanted to leave my job in good terms. The next time I was scheduled to work, I had a fight with ADON. I guess I have problem with being impusive and say things that I'm not suppose to before thinking about it. So I rudely told her not to talk to me becuase shes not in charge. Now I feel like i've completely ruined my job reputation. Now they are going to give me a horrible reference when they are doing my background check. I know my DON is going to work tommorw and I'm sure shes going to talk to me about it. Should I be honest with her and tell her that I've made a mistake? OR has the damange already been done? I'm thinking its either I will be terminated or they will give me a horrible reference. Please give me some feedbacks.

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Specializes in ICU/CCU, PICU.

You need to apologize for your unprofessional behavior to the ADON and anyone else who witnessed the fight. If the BON talks to you, don't disagree with anything, tell her how you were wrong.

I wouldn't be suprised if they did fire you. I hope you already have another position.

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Specializes in Cardiac care/Ortho/LTC/Education/Psych.

Well, you are in interesting position. If nothing else good comes from this you have learned something about yourself- you need to practice being professional and not emotional especially when it comes talking with other worker ( not matter who that is ). You said what you said - not return. Now how to fix or how to approach this ...First you need to talk with your DON . Think about why this whole fight came out.. was there plain your personal blunts or it was more challenging from other person knowing that you are leaving and being upset with you? Then, think if this is the first time you had an issue with this person? If there is a history with two of you then it is different. Then, think what other people think about you or what is your impression about your own work? If you are leaving there must be a bigger reason than just "I want to leave" so think about that... so when you come to the whole picture about the situation you will be more honest in your conversation with the DON. I usually say what I think but I use nice words and put myself into position of other person before I say anything too strong. So if this is your pattern maybe good counseling could help you to see reasons you react like that. At this moment try to save that impression if nothing else. Tell her that you were challenged , and put on spot or I do not know what situation was but I do not think anyone will just be plain rude and say harsh things.. I wish you good , it seams you need a lot of internal personal exploration. :heartbeat

Good luck .

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Specializes in Med Surg, Ortho.

I would apologize for the behavior and leave it at that. Just make sure you don't list the

ADON as the reference on your next job application. And definitely don't let them know you are worried about future references or your apology will be taken the wrong way, know what I mean? Good luck and take care!

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Specializes in M/S, ICU, ICP.

isn't it sort of funny how we have to learn things the hard way? i always did things like that, not quite so bad at it as i have matured and aged. your comment may have been honest and 100% correct to the adon but the delivery could have been a little less brisk. if you have had a good working relationship up until this instance then i would just say that i was sorry i let my mouth go off before i'd had time to think.

you have not ruined your job changes at leaving under a good impression or restarting elsewhere with a decent referal.

first i would apoligize because snapping at people may not be how you normally react and thus an apoligy is in order. second, even if you are like me and known for being a bit too straight forward with overloading your mouth, you want to make things right because there are professional ways to handle differences. i would apoligize and make things right because i want to repair any unprofessionalism within myself that i did, and i would want to leave with good blood between the place i am leaving and myself.never close the doors behind you and do you best to always leave on good term. and always keep a copy of any evaluations or writeups, don't leave it to management to give yoiu copies when you leave. that way then you will have them.

the idea of them giving a less than favorable reference should be a non issue. humor resources are very strict in what they may or may not ask. the reporting agency will only be able to state facts, that you came on time, had few if any call ins, met expectations in all evaluations. often a new place will ask the former one wholud the person be eligible for rehire. the answer to that is one they are really interested in.

they cannot go into details or whine or backbite or even give a negative evaluation on you. that would leave them vulnerable for divulding private information.

good luck. don't worry. the 2 weeks will be over before you even know it. you will be surprised at how down your stress levels will be just by making that desicion. you'll make it.

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Specializes in M/S, MICU, CVICU, SICU, ER, Trauma, NICU.

Fix that impulse control. NOW.

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Specializes in ER, Trauma.

You paint the entire event in terms negative to you. Is fear of a bad recommendation scareing you to the point of being unrealistic or unobjective in your description? You're experiencing a significant life change which is un-nerving enough. Be sure you're not making it worse in reality or in your imagination. Since you've already given your notice, good luck with your future. And being fired is often an automatic event in some institutions, so don't make more of it than you need to.

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You know Your lucky i wasn't your ADON. I would of sent you home staright up. You need to apologize for your unprofessional behavior. Hey i know i lack tact myself I'll speak my mind and not think about it until later. When i was a ADON. Many times i had to stop and rethink what i was going to say to people before i say them. My temper sometimes overloaded my *** and many times i bit my tongue.

If your worried about your reference i wouldn't worry about that. By law they really can't say much.

And snapping at someone is really nothing to write about Heck it could of been a bad day or you wasn't feeling well or so on. If they are going to right anything it would and should be about your past performance. If you were late or sick or any write up's or warnings and that's questionable if they could even do that. What i would look at is if you were well rounded team player so on.

As far as the BON getting in to it i have not heard once the BON getting in to anything like that that's handled in house unless you did like a med error or abuse or stealing narcs something along the line is the only time the BON should be told. I wish you luck i really do. These are my thoughts use them as you wish

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