People think I am stupid

[nikkole318]

I am a new nurse who just got off orientation a few weeks ago. I have worked at the hospital where I am for more than a year and was hired from a tech position to a nurse once I passed my boards. I thought everything would go smoothly once I got off orientation, but I've been wrong so far.

During orientation, I managed to make a lot of really stupid mistakes that I should have known better than to make, had numerous personality clashes with a couple of my preceptors, and got on my nurse educator's bad side. I know that people at work talk about me.

I have heard it first hand and get the sense that people do not like me. Although some of it is unwarranted bullying, I realize that some of it is my fault as well. I take the blame because my problems with coworkers seem to follow me wherever I go. I have never had an easy time making friends at work and have always gotten the reputation for being stupid, lazy, etc... I guess what I am asking for is help.

I realize that I can control how I present to other people. I am tired of being "that person." I need some tips on how to better my reputation and gain friends at work. I also need some words of encouragement. There is a girl at work who I know has spoke poorly about me to various people and I feel like as a result, these people now have a very negative opinion of me. I can tell by the knowing looks, sideways glances, and hushed whispers in the hall.

I realize that I cannot control what other adults do, but these things have really put a beating on my self esteem. Any advice on how to not **** other nurses off, how not to look stupid, and how to overcome a bad reputation? Thanks!

[nurseprnRN, BSN, RN]

The only time I could see the 12.5cc/hr running as a piggyback being an issue is if the pt is NPO and/or dehydrated and has maintenance fluids running pretty quick (150+) and the abx would take a while to run in.

Bingo. If for some reason your antibiotic baggie has 50 cc in it that means that for four hours that's all the patient is getting the way some pumps are set up. You should, in that case, have one pump for the 12.5cc/hr + another pump for the maintenance fluids.

As to the rest of it:

I am a new nurse who just got off orientation a few weeks ago. I have worked at the hospital where I am for more than a year and was hired from a tech position to a nurse once I passed my boards. I thought everything would go smoothly once I got off orientation, but I've been wrong so far. During orientation, I managed to make a lot of really stupid mistakes that I should have known better than to make, had numerous personality clashes with a couple of my preceptors, and got on my nurse educator's bad side. I know that people at work talk about me. I have heard it first hand and get the sense that people do not like me. Although some of it is unwarranted bullying, I realize that some of it is my fault as well. I take the blame because my problems with coworkers seem to follow me wherever I go. I have never had an easy time making friends at work and have always gotten the reputation for being stupid, lazy, etc... I guess what I am asking for is help. I realize that I can control how I present to other people. I am tired of being "that person." I need some tips on how to better my reputation and gain friends at work. I also need some words of encouragement. There is a girl at work who I know has spoke poorly about me to various people and I feel like as a result, these people now have a very negative opinion of me. I can tell by the knowing looks, sideways glances, and hushed whispers in the hall. I realize that I cannot control what other adults do, but these things have really put a beating on my self esteem. ... A couple times, there was an antibiotic running at only 12.5 ml/hour. Instead of running the normal saline concurrently so the patient would stay hydrated, I ran the antibiotic piggyback. Both times, my preceptor caught on and fixed it. I felt stupid, but will never make that mistake again. I also failed a test during orientation, which made me feel extra stupid. Once I forgot to put a sticker on the outside of the chart to list the patient's allergies. These are just some of the examples... Any advice on how to not **** other nurses off, how not to look stupid, and how to overcome a bad reputation? Thanks!

I think the answer here is perfectly clear: Stop making stupid mistakes (a COUPLE of times?? How do they know you'll never make that mistake again? You did it more than once already!), stop ******* people off, and think a lot less about your self-esteem than how damn dangerous they think you are, apparently with good reason.

[SaoirseRN]

I hang antibiotics often not "piggyback." If the pt has no fluids running, we direct line the antibiotics and administer them that way. To me piggyback means via IV, not necessarily with another fluid. The same with other meds, they are either IV push or piggyback. I guess I don't get what you mean by your comment.

It was implied that the antibiotics should run concurrently with the patient's ordered IV fluid. For example, if a patient was receiving an IV of normal saline at 100cc/hr, that infusion must continue to run at 100cc/hr and the antibiotic IV given in addition to that. By piggyback I mean that the 100cc/hr infusion rate is on hold while the antibiotic infuses. I was not speaking of patients who had no running IV, I was responding to the original statement where the OP was "in trouble" for piggybacking an antibiotic for a patient with a running IV.

[PMFB-RN, RN]

A couple times, there was an antibiotic running at only 12.5 ml/hour. Instead of running the normal saline concurrently so the patient would stay hydrated, I ran the antibiotic piggyback"

Well 12.5 is too slow but running abx piggy back is the standard way to run them in most cases.

[canigraduate]

I agree with the earlier poster who said to get a psych consult. If these problems happen to you at every job, the consistent factor is you and it can only help to find out if you actually have issues that can be worked on.

I have ADD pretty severely and never understood why I couldn't get along with people and why I missed the most insignificant little things like stickers all the time. Once I was diagnosed and began to understand how my mind worked, my relationships improved and I was able to set up some support for myself with a system of double-checks that cut down on my errors.

I am sorry that other posters are attacking you, I think that just increases your stress level and exacerbates the problem. I wish you the best of luck.

[everlongRN]

I have to agree with seeking some professional help. It sounds like your self esteem is shot (or you never had any to begin with). It's very hard to give you advice on how to get your coworkers to like you, without knowing you. Why do you say some of this is your own fault? Is this you being paranoid, or have people told you flat out what sort of things you do that make you unpopular?

As a new grad, no one expects you to be perfect. However, the old saying "I'll never make that mistake again" is really only valid after the first time. The IV thing is not something you necessarily learn in nursing school (unless you had the same exact scenario). It's kind of a common sense/critical thinking type of situation. I honestly wouldn't expect the average student to pick up on that (and lets face it, you were only a student a couple of months ago). I don't know that it's the your performance as a new nurse that's really the problem here. Have you been written up, counseled, or educated on any specific things? are you on probation? Despite her not being warm and fuzzy, has your educator given you any indication that your days are numbered? If not, I would just focus on being somewhat social, or at the very least cordial with your colleagues. During any downtime/breaks, be social. Are you the type who keeps to yourself, and hides behind a book or your phone? I'm not saying you have to be BFFs with these people, just be social. It makes for a better working environment, IMO.

[Vishwamitr]

I am a new nurse who just got off orientation a few weeks ago. I have worked at the hospital where I am for more than a year and was hired from a tech position to a nurse once I passed my boards. I thought everything would go smoothly once I got off orientation, but I've been wrong so far. During orientation, I managed to make a lot of really stupid mistakes that I should have known better than to make, had numerous personality clashes with a couple of my preceptors, and got on my nurse educator's bad side. I know that people at work talk about me. I have heard it first hand and get the sense that people do not like me. Although some of it is unwarranted bullying, I realize that some of it is my fault as well. I take the blame because my problems with coworkers seem to follow me wherever I go. I have never had an easy time making friends at work and have always gotten the reputation for being stupid, lazy, etc... I guess what I am asking for is help. I realize that I can control how I present to other people. I am tired of being "that person." I need some tips on how to better my reputation and gain friends at work. I also need some words of encouragement. There is a girl at work who I know has spoke poorly about me to various people and I feel like as a result, these people now have a very negative opinion of me. I can tell by the knowing looks, sideways glances, and hushed whispers in the hall. I realize that I cannot control what other adults do, but these things have really put a beating on my self esteem. Any advice on how to not **** other nurses off, how not to look stupid, and how to overcome a bad reputation? Thanks!

Dear Nikkole,

Of your own accord, you admit, " I have never had an easy time making friends at work and have always gotten the reputation for being stupid, lazy, etc...". By your own admission, you "had numerous personality clashes with a couple of my preceptors, and got on my nurse educator's bad side."

I don't know you, but you do not sound like a people's person. To be deemed stupid, lazy, etc... is definitely not reputation; that is ill-reputation. Nursing-units are very close-knit. Nurses talk about their patients and ......one another. If you want to live in the swamp, you'll need to make friends with the alligators, so to speak.

Perhaps, you need a major change in attitude. Go ahead and retort, "Look who's talking".

[Anna Flaxis, BSN, RN]

12.5mL/hr would be an appropriate rate for 4.5gm of Zosyn in 50mL to run in over 4 hours, or for a med in a 25mL mini bag to run in over 2 hours, so without knowing the details, I can't comment on whether that was a mistake. As others have stated, it's common practice to piggyback antibiotics unless you have an order to the contrary. And a new nurse forgetting to put a sticker on the chart? That is a ridiculous thing to be nitpicky about.

It seems to me that your bigger issue is a lack of interpersonal skills. There are a lot of different reasons people can lack in this area ranging from one's upbringing to organic causes like autism.

Fortunately, you can learn and develop better interpersonal skills if you have a willingness to do the work. You've accomplished the first step by identifying that there is a problem that you have control over and asking for help.

The next step is to actually get the help. If you have health insurance, ask for a list of providers from your insurance company (you may be able to do this through your HR department). This list will consist of behavioral health specialists from psychiatrists to psychologists to counselors. It may take a little trial and error to find a therapist that works for you, so don't be discouraged if you try one and you just don't click with them. Just try another until you find that one that you can work with.

Another option is to find a low cost community counseling center. There are also support groups and peer counselors, where you provide counseling support for one another.

Last but not least, if you have a community college within a reasonable distance, find out about what kind of human relations courses they offer.

Good luck!

[porkey2]

Im not even practicing yet, and I thought thats how you were suppose to give them.

I have never, ever heard of antibiotics being given any other way besides piggyback. I was taught to piggyback them and in my almost 7 years of practicing as an RN I have always piggybacked them.

[Carrollrn]

I am so sorry you are going thru this- I am not BULLYING YOU. But I want you to know something. I been there and Done that.

U need to wake up and FIX whats happening. Watch ur back, Ur License and UR PATIENTS. As with all drama in hospitals, if you change your behavior, attitude and be confident but careful You will be ok.

NURSES are biggest gossipers. Dont give them a reason to!! Seek counseling from a PROFESSIONAL- not other nurses at your work. and keep us posted.

[ktwlpn, LPN]

I guess I can be the first to say "Good for you" for acknowledging that you may be part of the problem and looking for ways to fix it instead of blaming everyone else for "eating" you.I truly admire that-I imagine that just sitting down and writing that post took alot of effort. Counseling will help you immensly with your interpersonal problems,good luck....

[NutmeggeRN, BSN]

Sounds like you have some communication issues.....ADHD has been floated....ever give any thought to possibly having Aspergers?....not making a diagnosis, just something to think about....

[Music in My Heart]

Another thing of which you should be mindful is ~how~ you receive criticism for your mistakes.

Throughout my career, I have genuinely sought out legitimate criticism for it's the only way to learn and grow.

Perhaps you come off as defensive or unconcerned when people have tried to correct you; that could certainly explain some of what you describe.