Ever had a nursing instructor hate you?

MollyLPN · Feb 17, 2011

What sites do you recommend for background checks? That is such good advice! Thanks.

I just started by finding out her information on the state license site, then Google. I placed her name in the police records, and also real estate records. There are sites and services that do background checks too, but I decided not to go there.

Once I found out about her arrest, and the charges, I didn't pursue much more information. I had the case record number and could have found out more, but I didn't. I didn't want to possibly cross into stalker territory. I just wanted to find out if this person was as irrational and possibly emotionally ill in her private life as she was professionally and towards me. I needed some validation that I wasn't going crazy, or being paranoid and sensitive, and I got it.

Mostly, I needed to know that her opinion of what sort of nurse I was going to be was an opinion to be respected. And anyone that harms an elderly (or any) person is not the sort of person I would respect. That knowledge really set me free.

Some other posters here noted that once one teacher doesn't like you, they talk to the others, and if it's a small school (as mine was) that can harm you. So it became a domino effect. I think that's what happened with the other teacher, she didn't have a criminal background, but she was easily influenced by other opinions, a trait I saw manifested in other situations involving her. So she listened to the other teacher's opinion, read my write ups in the file, and prejudged me. (Two other clinical teacher who weren't affiliated with these women was very approving of my clinical skills, both saying I was one of the best in the class, which helps validate this theory.) So she wasn't emotionally ill like my first teacher, just emotionally weak. A big difference.

So anyway my point of this is that I don't go running around doing background checks on people willy-nilly, but in this case, with someone who was really off center, it sure did help me to understand what went on. That knowledge helped to heal.

janice o. lvn · Feb 17, 2011

Yes I have actually and it really sucks because once they have it in for you you are out no matter what you do. The worst part is that you have NO recourse. Some of these instructors on just on big power trips and haven't been working on a busy floor in years and forgot what it's really like! Just try to keep a low profile, your head down and get through it. Good luck!

Warpster · Feb 18, 2011

Yeah, one, a study in raging personality conflict. It was during pediatrics, a discipline I already knew I would not count as the high part of my nursing education. I knew enough to let her huff and blow and try to push buttons without reacting or rising to the bait, but it was still miserable. Fortunately, there was a whole team during that rotation and the others thought I was just fine, so her multiple team conferences got her nowhere, I passed pedi with a 4.0, and she went on to greener pastures the next semester.

Bon voyage.

madfowl · Feb 19, 2011

I feel that you reminded the instructor of a past student, and took all of the frustration and anger that she had with that past student on you. YOu didnt stand a chance in hell.

Action plan: 1. DOCUMENT EVERYTHING. 2. Let the Dean/Provost know that you are being treated unfairly, (DOCUMENT RESPONSES) 3. Contact a lawyer to write a letter for you detainling events, and what you want to be done. I know that this is a huge step for you, but I know that it will work cuz, your prof is bullying you and most bullies are cowards. Getting legal representation shows that you are no wuss and is not going down with out a fight.

I am pretty sure that the student policy manual details that every student have a right to freedom from verbal abuse, including demeaning statements.

BTW, why is my gut telling me that you are black and the "person" is white?

WindyhillBSN · Feb 20, 2011

When I was in nursing school.. getting on the bad side of a teacher would give you a much higher chance for failing if your grades are on the fence. I've seen it happen. Things like care plans can be graded very subjectively and the grades can be skewed. I personally would say if you are in the top 20% of your class, you don't have to do anything to appease her. But if you are a C student I would seriously be kissing some patooty and try to redeem yourself. My best advice to any nursing student is to fly under the radar.

This is sad but a very true to reality post. It sucks!

ComeClarity · Feb 25, 2011

You probably won't have to deal with many of the other students soon, as they will probably fail out. This will cause fewer students in the class, and more attention drawn to you. This may or may not be a good thing.
I was hated by two of my teachers, one really badly. It had nothing to do with being the student they really thought was best, and so held to a higher standard. No, they hated me. The students who were snarky, bad attitudes, were late, got poorer grades, they liked and often praised to me. Oh, and most cheated. I never did.

:eek: What kind of nursing school did you go to?! That sounds like a horrible experience..

Eponine · Feb 26, 2011

I have one now. In addition to being my lecture professor, she is my CI. She is critical of every move I make.

If I speak up during our wrap up session after clinicals, I'm talking to other students. If I don't speak up, I'm not being an active participant.

I have never been late with an assignment, yet she has marked me late twice.

I was also criticized for being "too tired and unprofessional." Because I yawned on the way to my car at the end of clinical. In the parking garage. Once.

She despises me and I don't know why. I would try to fly under her radar, but she is the CI for my lab section and there are only seven of us, so she knows me already.

Good luck! I know I'm going to need it.

S.N. Visit, BSN, RN · Mar 4, 2011

Oh I was told by one "I feel that I failed you from becoming a good nurse & you are narrow minded." My second CI told me that "if I go into mental health after graduation instead of Med surg, I would be throwing away everything I learned and I wasted 2 yrs of her time. "
My quoting is messed up and it will only let me quote 1 person at a time..so here's the first. This doesn't sound like hate, it sounds like them being very critical and giving you a fair evaluation..what's the problem with that??? Is it what you wanna hear? No. Is it hateful? No. Take some criticism without being on the defensive
Too much to post here and not enough time to list my reasons I feel they hated me. I agree the above examples weren't the best to use. Maybe they didn't "Hate Me", instead they really disliked me intensely. I had nearly 2years experience with them to know. Those two quotes were actually the nicest things they ever said to me.

bustthewave · Mar 4, 2011

Hey guys let me just say-

Thank you all very much for the honest feedback. I have really read every post and thought about it.

What I've learned here is that, if I'm going to be dedicated to nursing I can't give up just because instructors dislike me. I'm the only one who can make me feel defeated.

In dealing with my instructors, I decided to let it slide, and let clinicals speak for itself (I foruntately got clinicals with the instructor who is nice, and now after almost being done with clinicals I feel like I am leaving a very good impression of being a hard worker, and caring for my patients no matter what).

If after clinicals, I still get pushback, I will, instead of complaining about it and feeling defeated, pull the instructor aside.

What I think is my fault in all of this? My attitude. Even though I didn't try to show an attitude towards the severe lack of organization with this class, I felt it consistently. It must have shown through somehow. Maybe I made a comment that I thought the instructors couldn't hear, or maybe it just showed on my face. Either way, even if I'm frusterated by how things are done, my goal should be to getting that RN degree and license. If I'm having a bad attitude, bad enough that it's showing, then I'm allowing something external defeat me, and not really being fair to my instructors.

So yea, thanks again for the very thoughtful replies guys. I have one more week of clinicals left, and I will pass this class with flying colors! :)

clandestine-approach · Mar 22, 2011

@ kgh31386. I was merely perusing this page and was a little irritated regarding your aggressive multiple posts. Assume for a second... that there is some validity to what these other users are posting. I assure you that insecurity is very destructive, especially when considering the manifested behaviors of an insecure person, and then compounded to a group whenever that individual is the actual "instructor". It does happen... I am an "A" student nurse... yes I have seen these behaviors and sometimes it really is therapeutic to read that others have encountered similar situations, and will continue to. However.... it doesn't make their concerns trivial. Your comments on this page, I feel, are that of an insecure bully... SO YOUR PRESENCE HERE IS EVIDENT THAT THESE BEHAVIORS EXIST IN THIS FIELD.. ACADEMICALLY AND CLINICALLY.

kgh31386, BSN, MSN, RN · Mar 24, 2011

@ kgh31386. I was merely perusing this page and was a little irritated regarding your aggressive multiple posts. Assume for a second... that there is some validity to what these other users are posting. I assure you that insecurity is very destructive, especially when considering the manifested behaviors of an insecure person, and then compounded to a group whenever that individual is the actual "instructor". It does happen... I am an "A" student nurse... yes I have seen these behaviors and sometimes it really is therapeutic to read that others have encountered similar situations, and will continue to. However.... it doesn't make their concerns trivial. Your comments on this page, I feel, are that of an insecure bully... SO YOUR PRESENCE HERE IS EVIDENT THAT THESE BEHAVIORS EXIST IN THIS FIELD.. ACADEMICALLY AND CLINICALLY.

Did I really get yelled at via discussion on a forum? Ok then...my posts on here were not nearly as aggressive as others regarding this same topic. I didn't say their post was invalid, I just said sometimes criticism isn't what people are used to. I guess I'm the nicest bully out there though, especially since my teachers have me come teach their clinical students things and the students don't seem upset, and love to ask questions. Oh and the fact that I'm in grad school to be a teacher. But I'm gonna go ahead and buy a beware sign to stick on my forehead...cuz watch out! This bully ain't stoppin the tears start rollin :lol2: (hopefully you know sarcasm, or a joke..don't take that literally, which you might have already).

It's not really me who comes off as an insecure, but ask yourself this. Does it make me insecure to take everything so defensively? Does it make me insecure to think everyone is out to bully me and pick on me? Can I take criticism and really what I might have done wrong?

I find it funny you single out my post, but support the posts saying that smart students intimidate teachers, or smart nurses intimidate managers..or that teachers are jealous because of what students have?

MollyLPN · Mar 24, 2011

What kind of nursing school did you go to?! That sounds like a horrible experience..

kittah (love the name, btw), my school was considered to be the best in the area. There were several LPN schools in my area, and this one is considered to have the highest standards. It received a prestigious state award while I was there (that none of the other schools got). One time in clinical, students from another area school showed up and they were told to leave by the hospital because we were the school they wanted most there. I heard that often from staff at the places we went that our school was considered the best.

But I didn't research enough: some of the postings about my school stated it was known for a lot of drama, with students in the know choosing to go to another school that had a slightly less stellar reputation and more compassionate and helpful teachers.

So I'm glad it's over, I passed (unlike so many others), and I did get the good education that I sought. I just wish I had more teachers I actually could have gone to for advice, instead of just trying to be invisible and surviving. Thriving would have been so much more productive.