Enablement Overload

Published

It just...gets to me sometimes. I know it's common and it's everywhere, but it still does.

(5th grader)

"My belly really hurts."

"How long has it been bothering you for?"

"Like three minutes."

I usually let it slide off my back, but sometimes kids' increasing lack of any resilience and/or ability to deal with adversity of any sort just fills me with concern (or dread) for the future.

I honestly don't think I even knew where the nurse's office was when I was in school..

Specializes in Pediatrics Retired.
So broughden...refresh my memory as to the area of nursing you are practicing in?

...???...

Specializes in med-surg, IMC, school nursing, NICU.
...???...

*chirp, chirp*

(hi guys)

Specializes in Addictions, psych, corrections, transfers.

As mental health and addiction nurse, I treat some of these very same people as adults. The main culprit is no coping skills. Many cannot deal with being even slightly uncomfortable for more than a few seconds. What's sad is that even some of the patients that are over 40 are still being enabled by their parents. I don't know what the solution is but I know it's a problem that can last them for rest of their lives and it's getting more and more prevalent.

*chirp, chirp*

(hi guys)

Where the heck have YOU been, Missy?

Specializes in kids.
...???...

Appears to be IN nursing school although a member since 2009? Maybe in a BSN program?

What I have noticed is that kids cannot do anything at all for themselves. I have to tell them to use paper towel to dry their hands as they won't even try to look on the wall where it is. They just set trash on the counter with no thought that they should be taking it to the trash can. They even have a hard time signing themselves in when they arrive to clinic. I have sheets for them to complete with what I need highlighted. There is a calendar block and digital clock right in front of the clipboard yet 99% of them ask me for the date / time. No critical thinking skills at all. Robots who are used to being spoon fed. It is sad and frightening!

OMG this ^^^^...some days just drives me nuts!

Specializes in Pediatrics Retired.
As mental health and addiction nurse, I treat some of these very same people as adults. The main culprit is no coping skills. Many cannot deal with being even slightly uncomfortable for more than a few seconds. What's sad is that even some of the patients that are over 40 are still being enabled by their parents. I don't know what the solution is but I know it's a problem that can last them for rest of their lives and it's getting more and more prevalent.

Thank you for your input. My Sweet Petunia is a Home Health PT. She is amazed by the high incidence of elderly patients she sees whose adult children have never left home and are not employed.

I admit that I've lurked here for years, but I finally signed up just for this thread. Also: paramedic of over 10 years, in nursing school but not a nurse yet.

My 6 year old daughter has developed a bad habit of going to the school nurse. Yesterday it was because her "tooth felt funny", so the teacher sent her to the poor school nurse(despite my request to not allow DD to go to the nurse for this kind of thing. Blood, yes. Tooth funniness, no). Turns out it was a piece of sandwich. For DD, I think it's her discovery that someone out there will give her hugs and attention over these very minor complaints, when Mom at home doesn't give them the time of day.(Your foot has been swollen for 32 seconds? I'm sorry. You still need to clean your bedroom)

So I sympathize. Greatly. But please know there at some parents trying to raise our children with some grit, but they've found a way to drive their school nurse crazy regardless.

Specializes in Pediatrics Retired.
I admit that I've lurked here for years, but I finally signed up just for this thread. Also: paramedic of over 10 years, in nursing school but not a nurse yet.

My 6 year old daughter has developed a bad habit of going to the school nurse. Yesterday it was because her "tooth felt funny", so the teacher sent her to the poor school nurse(despite my request to not allow DD to go to the nurse for this kind of thing. Blood, yes. Tooth funniness, no). Turns out it was a piece of sandwich. For DD, I think it's her discovery that someone out there will give her hugs and attention over these very minor complaints, when Mom at home doesn't give them the time of day.(Your foot has been swollen for 32 seconds? I'm sorry. You still need to clean your bedroom)

So I sympathize. Greatly. But please know there at some parents trying to raise our children with some grit, but they've found a way to drive their school nurse crazy regardless.

Believe me...we recognize kids who are raised in such a household as you describe. That comes in the form of seeing an understanding by the student when you speak of problem solving suggestions or when you ask them what would your mom or dad tell you about this? These kids never make it into the frequent flyer club because they've been guided and allowed the opportunity to engage in abstract reasoning. Conversely, others respond with a blank stare.

Good for you...and good luck with nursing school!!

Specializes in med-surg, IMC, school nursing, NICU.
Where the heck have YOU been, Missy?

Working nights at the hospital that raised me (aka hired me as a new grad)

Thinking about what I want to do when I grow up.

Missing you guys!

Specializes in kids.
Working nights at the hospital that raised me (aka hired me as a new grad)

Thinking about what I want to do when I grow up.

Missing you guys!

Missing you as well!!

Specializes in IMC, school nursing.
As mental health and addiction nurse, I treat some of these very same people as adults. The main culprit is no coping skills. Many cannot deal with being even slightly uncomfortable for more than a few seconds. What's sad is that even some of the patients that are over 40 are still being enabled by their parents. I don't know what the solution is but I know it's a problem that can last them for rest of their lives and it's getting more and more prevalent.

I find myself stating over and over "that's life". I get the biggest complaints about the littlest of things. Meanwhile, my son who has 30 stitches in his leg and a JP hanging out of it, is walking around taking Tylenol for pain after a morning Oxy to get him out of bed. The Oxy doesn't even make him tired because his body NEEDS it. Suck it up buttercups.

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