Effective communication at work

CNL2B · Jun 20, 2010

We have a program called Civility, Respect, and Engagement in the Workplace (CREW, for short.) It is strongly encouraged and might even be mandatory (not sure.) It is a LOT of coursework -- like, 3-8 hour days worth.

I think ideally it is supposed to help change the culture but I don't think it really has.

Communication is difficult for almost everyone at times. Probably everything that flies out of my mouth I probably, had I thought about it, could have said better. Thinking first really matters....

But how do you get people to think first? I don't know.

ivorybunny · Jun 20, 2010

My hospital hosted a 3 session class on effective communication. It was geared towards the shared goverance, the unit based council members. There was actually a lot of good information in it. At times it actually made me stop and think about the way I was trying to get something across. Part of the course work was figuring out what kind of sender and receiver you are. My favorite being the passive-aggressive sender- as well as the defensive receiver (everything said is automatically taken as a personal threat- this is great when it's your manager's method). There are effective classes out there. One thing to realize though, it takes people wanting to understand how to communicate and how to improve it before any type of communication course will work.

Davey Do · Jun 20, 2010

To "appreciate" is to realize the value of something. So, nursemandalyn, perhaps your co-worker's tone is an actual indication of her appreciation for what is being said. It sounds like your co-worker is honest, yet lacking, in certain social graces. Being condescending is definitely not a good communication technique.

That sort of behavior is difficult to get around; it takes the focus off of the goal for the communication.

missbecky2006 and ivorynurse both mentioned programs and classes on methods in inhancing communication. We all could learn better communication techniques and put those techniques into practise.

Communication is like Socrates take on life: Unless it's examined, it isn't worthy.

All three of you sound like individuals who are open for growth. Sadly, some people aren't. It's like a friend of mine once said, "We're either the a**hole or we have to put up with the a**hole."

The best we can do in most situations is to be a good example.

Of course there's always manipulation. Manipulating a situation in order to achieve a desired goal. It takes practise. But, then again, that's one reason it's called a program. A program needs to be regularly practised.

One universal law says that an object will remain in motion until something impedes that motion. Behavior is like that. People will use whatever behavior they can that gets them what they want. Unless they are deterred, they will continue that behavior.

If we can show the "unenlightened" the error of their ways, perhaps it will give them cause to pause, examine their behavior, and have an illuminating revelation. Then, maybe they will do something in order to change that behavior.

But probably not. Self-examination and change are difficult experiences. So, they'll probably continue on their course unabated.

All we can do is change our perspective. Or accept the situation and say, "With these oxen, we must plow." Or maybe we just have to identify ourselves as ones who "have to put up with the a**hole."

Thanks for allowing me my stream of conscious. And to pontificate proliferically.

The best to you.

allnurses Guide · Jun 20, 2010

I don't mind the classes and seminars, and I do learn new things. What I've found is that the people who have the most difficulty with communication change the least, and the people who already do a decent job of it are most likely to absorb it and implement improvements.

I think I know the tone you are talking about nursemandalyn. I've always called it teacher-speak, because that is where I first heard it, and it is just so annoying. Normally full of cookbook phrases delivered in a tone both prissy and condescending.

"Um, I have a concern". . ."I'd like to dialogue. ." I feel really guilty that this annoys me so much, because I guess it's better than being asked "what the hell are you doing!?!" but only marginally.

SandraCVRN · Jun 20, 2010

I don't mind the classes and seminars, and I do learn new things. What I've found is that the people who have the most difficulty with communication change the least, and the people who already do a decent job of it are most likely to absorb it and implement improvements.
I think I know the tone you are talking about nursemandalyn. I've always called it teacher-speak, because that is where I first heard it, and it is just so annoying. Normally full of cookbook phrases delivered in a tone both prissy and condescending.
"Um, I have a concern". . ."I'd like to dialogue. ." I feel really guilty that this annoys me so much, because I guess it's better than being asked "what the hell are you doing!?!" but only marginally.

Great post. I think the highlighted portion applies to most things. It seems like whenever there is a staff meeting about anything...say being tardy from break..the people that take it to heart are the ones that REALLY make it back on time but not early and those that take twice as long as they are supposed to don't pay any attention.

And Davey "We're either the ******* or we have to put up with the *******." we probably need to remember sometimes we are the ******** :clown:

tokebi · Jun 21, 2010

I think I know the tone you are talking about nursemandalyn. I've always called it teacher-speak, because that is where I first heard it, and it is just so annoying. Normally full of cookbook phrases delivered in a tone both prissy and condescending.
"Um, I have a concern". . ."I'd like to dialogue. ." I feel really guilty that this annoys me so much, because I guess it's better than being asked "what the hell are you doing!?!" but only marginally.

Honestly... I actually prefer being asked "what the hell are you doing?!"

This new trend of starting every freaking sentence with "I appreciate..." along with many other invented scripts... I can't stand them, mainly because they're insincere. If someone has a problem with me, I'd love them to come to me and speak the way they feel. Faked politeness is no better than the robotic "Your call is very important to us" message you hear whenever you call some phone company or something when the endless wait and grumpy attitude when you finally get to speak to a rep, is anything but.

These classes... I really don't see them as anything more than the excuse for the corporates to say, "Well, we did something about the problem. Case closed."

A true change of workplace culture takes tremendous time, effort, dedication from both management and employees. Sometimes painful sacrifice may even be needed. Why bother? It's much easier to give a class and pretend that everyone really takes it seriously.

Fribblet · Jun 21, 2010

Having an employer provide mandatory classes to "improve communication" sounds like a colossal waste of both time and money.

Seriously, some people are excellent communicators by nature and others suck at it. Those that want to improve will on their own and a brief class full of cliches won't help them.

Davey Do · Jun 21, 2010

You all make such good points. And I can identify. It's one of the reasons I'm SO glad to be involved with this site.

Frbblet, I hear you when you say , "a clossal waste of time...some people are excellent communicators by nature and others suck at it." However, an attempt at improving a situation is better than no attempt at all.

Sometimes I believe seminars and inservices are put on just 'cause the institution is required by certin governing agents and guidelines to provide education and enlightenment.

But I don't know anything for sure. Just my two cents.

So there.

rngolfer53 · Jun 21, 2010

I don't mind the classes and seminars, and I do learn new things. What I've found is that the people who have the most difficulty with communication change the least, and the people who already do a decent job of it are most likely to absorb it and implement improvements.
I think I know the tone you are talking about nursemandalyn. I've always called it teacher-speak, because that is where I first heard it, and it is just so annoying. Normally full of cookbook phrases delivered in a tone both prissy and condescending.
"Um, I have a concern". . ."I'd like to dialogue. ." I feel really guilty that this annoys me so much, because I guess it's better than being asked "what the hell are you doing!?!" but only marginally.

Not a thing wrong with "what the hell are you doing?"

It's clear, direct, saves time and is no more offensive than using the "right" words in a phony way.

No amount of verbal formulas picked up from some (expensive to provide) seminar will induce someone to behave respectably to others. One can be arch/condesending/snide/ etc. with the approved verbal formulas.

allnurses Guide · Jun 21, 2010

Well, we used to get lunch and a coffee mug emblazoned with the cute acronym du jour for sitting through the classes, but I suppose even those little perks have been done away with. sighh..

nicole109 · Jun 21, 2010

I agree with whoever said that the classes are a huge waste of time, especially the one that lasted 3-8 days! Give me a break, and no I'm not a horrible communicator. I've come to grips with my flaws, because yes, we all have them...but I'm one of those very direct people and I too, prefer a "what the hell is wrong with you", if you have a problem/question/issue with something that I'm doing, please come to me directly and ask me, don't skirt around it, don't go to someone else and talk about it, and don't send messages around the entire unit everyone starts pointing fingers and nobody has any idea about what is really going on. We are all adults and whether or not we all communicate in a "positive" way, we do all communicate, and the DIFFERENT ways that we accomplish that, is what makes the world go round!