Do you have a resident you cant stand?

prettyinblu · Dec 27, 2010

Yes i have had those thoughts many days working in LTC. However ive learned that when you run away from those type of people another shows up in a different form at another SNF. People are angry because of their quality of life and chose to take it out on the only people taking care of them! Ask yourself this any of the family complaining and taking pictures would they take care of the resident they way the staff does? It only gets worse and those type of residents NEVER leave and management ALWAYS sides with the family :down:

Forever Sunshine, ASN, RN · Dec 27, 2010

There is a resident who is on everyones nerves and is growing on mine.

The other night we were seriously short staffed. So I took her roommate( 1 assist) to the bathroom before I took her down to the dining room for dinner. As I was coming out of the bathroom with her this resident comes into her room. "Oh can you change my bag if you are doing that" (Implying that I should change her bag because I took her roommate to the bathroom and I'm doing CNA work). I explained to her the situation that the unit has tonight and told her I am helping where I can but I still have my own job that must get done as well.

I am helping pass out dinner trays about 10 minutes later and she comes up to me in the hallway. "Now are you available to change my bag.." I admit I was assertive and firm with her. I told her "Your bag will be changed after dinner, I have to pass trays to the other residents and the CNAs are doing that as well. I told you before we are very short staffed. Please go to the dining room." and I walked away and continued to do what I was doing."

She is very manipulative and constantly finding something wrong with her. According to her she has every disease in the book. She always wants to go to the hospital. One night I was working 11-7. At 4am the CNA said she wanted to talk to me. So I go in the room and she says. 'I would like to go to the hospital. I feel very constipated and I also might have a UTI. The doctor there knows me well. " I was about to start the medpass and it really wasn't' a wise time to be calling the doctor for this. So I told her "It will have to wait until the morning, this isn't an emergency.. it is the middle of the night."

Selene006, BSN, LPN · Dec 27, 2010

I've had a resident like this in the LTC setting. This patient treated ALL staff members as though they were less than human beings, and it created tension with all caretakers on duty. I had nursing assistants who refused to give care to this patient, and I watched nurses walk on egg shells whenever this patient put on her call light (which was frequently). Some nurses even refused to speak to this patient without another nurse or staff member present to witness the interaction! As the nurse, I addressed her needs at the beginning of my shift so that she would know what to expect from staff (which always took about a half hour), and I warned the staff that we were all being monitored by the patient and all of her family members. It was easier to just address the patient and find out what she wanted, rather than just avoid her because she was deliberately trying to create chaos out of boredom as a result of personal life disappointments.

One day when I showed up to work, the patient was gone. I didn't bother to inquire about her whereabouts because she had a long history of getting dumped from a variety of different nursing homes within the area. I sighed with relief, but it was not long before another patient with the same motivations appeared...

noctanol · Dec 27, 2010

Hey y'all LTC people. I have a resident that I absolutely can not stand. It would not be going too far to say that I hate her as a person but I still treat her with respect. She is 50 years old and rude as can be, has no patience, her family is taking pictures of every thing and everyone in the nursing home and has hired a lawyer. Now she makes demands and says "I am recording everything and you have to do everything I ask, when I ask otherwise I will call my lawyer'.
She is completely 'with it' and I understand all about feeling the need for control, but I really, really, can not stand her. Management is all up in arms about needing to cater to her and her family's whims so they will reconsider the lawsuit. I am thisclose to putting in my notice, but I realize that if they plan on naming me in the suit, quiting will not stop them.
Just a vent....thanks for reading

she seems like a trouble patient, why doesn't the LTC get rid of her, she will eventually sue the facility or the nurses. We've had one or two such patients. One of them was alert and oriented X 3 and was told to look for another facility. Soon after that, she was "raped" by a male med aide. Offcourse everything got cleared up and the med aide was found innocent.

The type that i hate and cant stang is the ones that bother you (staff) because they are always high. I have a patient on scheduled oxycontin, risperdal, xanax, hydrocodone, and alprozalam plus extra extra prns. I once told the unit manager that probably is because she is just too high on all that. with that say, she has fired two docs for not prescribing/changinh her medications. ohhh she is also on ambien at night, lyrica and trazadone

juzme · Dec 27, 2010

When I have a pt/resident like this at any time, I would simply tell them that I am doing the best job that I can do and trully care about helping people, so if I get sued and lose my license , etc that will be one less good nurse around! That has usually stopped them in their tracks. I will not be threatened or harassed by a resident/pt or their family members.

orthonurse55 · Dec 27, 2010

Oh yes - people are people so of course we are going to find some we can't tolerate! We can't possibly like every single one of them and their families! There is one man where I work part time that I detest. Part of his problem ( I think) is that he hates women. So I try to avoid him as much as possible and kill him with kindness when I have to see him. It seems to work well for both of us. Good luck. Your people are probably just blowing smoke you-know-where.

Long Term Care Columnist / Guide · Dec 27, 2010

Hey y'all LTC people. I have a resident that I absolutely can not stand. It would not be going too far to say that I hate her as a person but I still treat her with respect. She is 50 years old and rude as can be, has no patience, her family is taking pictures of every thing and everyone in the nursing home and has hired a lawyer. Now she makes demands and says "I am recording everything and you have to do everything I ask, when I ask otherwise I will call my lawyer'.
She is completely 'with it' and I understand all about feeling the need for control, but I really, really, can not stand her. Management is all up in arms about needing to cater to her and her family's whims so they will reconsider the lawsuit. I am thisclose to putting in my notice, but I realize that if they plan on naming me in the suit, quiting will not stop them.
Just a vent....thanks for reading

Let me play devil's advocate here for a minute: this resident is only 50 years old? and she's in a LTC? Right away, that's got to be extremely hard to endure; after all, she's decades younger than most of the clientele, and light-years beyond them in her cognitive abilities. She's got to be bored out of her skull---who can she really talk to? And as I'm sure we all know, people who don't have enough to do are the ones who cause trouble.

Still, I'm only a couple of years older than your patient, and believe me, if I were sick and stuck in a place where I had to deal with confused people yelling all night and blundering into my room getting into my things, and staff pushing linen barrels along the floor at all hours, talking in the halls, turning on lights in the middle of the night, and telling me when, where, and what to eat......well, I'd probably develop an attitude problem myself.

But OK, if she really is a witch on wheels, the best thing to do (in my experience) for her and her family is to "kill 'em with kindness". I've found that the toughest tigers to tame will often wind up purring like kittens once they feel their concerns are being heard, even if there really is little that can be done about what's bothering them. I've also learned that patients and families whose needs are anticipated and met to the best of the staff's ability very seldom pull the lawsuit card or complain to APS.......so it might behoove everyone if you all make up your minds to treat this woman well. I'm sure she didn't ask to be in a nursing home at such a young age, when most people are reaching the prime of their lives and enjoying the fruits of their labors in reasonably good health. Show her you're on her side, that you want her to get well so she can get back to her normal life (whatever "normal" means to her), and she just might change her outlook a little. I've seen it happen again and again over the course of my career; there are VERY few people who are completely irredeemable. :nurse:

lifelearningrn, BSN, RN · Dec 27, 2010

50 years old in a nursing home? That scares me as in 12 short years I'll be 50! Can I ask why the hell they are trying to sue? Is it even appropriate for someone as young as her to be in a home for elderly people? I don't really know how all that works..

handyrn · Dec 27, 2010

The first thing that came into my mind when I read this was that she and her family are possibly violating HIPPA laws by taking pictures. How can you be sure that she is not getting other residents in the pictures without their permission? Wouldn't that right there make her photos inadmissable in any lawsuit or court of law?

As far as dealing with a difficult resident, yep, we gotta do it sometimes. I feel for you after having worked in LTC for many years and dealing with difficult people.

caliotter3 · Dec 27, 2010

I have dealt with clients in home health who like to talk lawsuit all the time. I've reported the incidents to my employer after several instances and when it seemed they were serious. I can't for the life of me figure out why the agency doesn't dump these lawsuits waiting to happen. It is not like there isn't an abundance of potential business from people who can show a little more gratitude to have anyone at all to take care of them. I felt the same way about the same type of characters in long term care facilities. Waiting lists of people to get admitted to facilities, and management insists on kissing the rears of people like those mentioned here.

nerdtonurse?, BSN, RN · Dec 27, 2010

My aunt is just like that; if she was my patient in the ICU, I think I'd call in sick. The only thing I've ever, EVER seen work with her is setting very, very firm boundaries....the nicer you are to her, the worse you make her. Personality disorder, table for one...