I have a court case coming up in a month and when I told the staffing coordinator about it she said she needed documentation. Originally I told her that I needed a personal day, then the ADON who was also in the office said half way joking " We may can not give you that day off" I responded " I have a court date that day"
Then the staffing coordinator stated that she needed a copy of the paper work from court.
I know that my job will find out sooner or later that I'm going through a divorce but I just don't feel like Its necessary to give them this personal information at this time. The court case is at 9am , so I'm worried that she will expect me to work my scheduled 3-11 shift.
Even though I could make it to work, I honestly don't feel up to it emotionally and rather take the whole day off. I never brought my personal problems to work. Most of my coworkers know me as a young, bubbly single person and have no idea what I'm going through and I rather keep it that way.
What are your thoughts ? Am I required to provide this documentation ?
Specializes in Trauma Surgery, Nursing Management.
Honey, give them ONLY the court dates and let them know that it is for a divorce. DO NOT HOPE that they keep it to themselves; make it clear to them that your expectation is that they will say nothing. Make it clear that this is a private matter and that you can't say more about it because your attorney has instructed you not to discuss it. They don't know that you don't have an atty. They don't have to know. What they MUST know, however, is that this is confidential. If you go into this proceeding without an atty, then you are representing yourself, and thus in effect means that you are your own atty. You are instructing YOURSELF not to discuss it. You have the law on your side here.
Last weekend, our weekend day nurse didn't even bother to do that. She was a no call, no show for both days and the staffing coordinator could not reach her. However, my coworker nosiness goes no further than to hope nothing bad happened to her.
Specializes in RN-OB, Postpartum, Neonatal Nursing.
You do not have to give that information. It has nothing to do with work. Sounds like you need to contact human resources because that is none of their business. They are just being nosy and trying to get into your personal business. Sorry that you are having to go through this.
you are making a mountain out of a molehill. I would not give them any paperwork and if they do not give you the requested day off, then just call in sick that day. It really is that simple.
Yep. I wouldn't give them any paperwork except for a request form for the day off. Probably wouldn't have even said "court date." I'd have said, "family emergency." But with a court date, who cares if they're nosy, how do they know you haven't just been called as a witness for a car accident or something?
I also don't supply "doctor notes" when I'm out sick unless I'm going to be filing for FMLA or disability. If they don't trust me to know if myself is sick, they shouldn't be trusting me with patient care.
You're trying too hard to please them when you have every right to take the day off. If the schedule is already out, then just call in on that day. If it's not out, request the day. If you don't get it, then call in on that day.
I believe this is just another stupid control issue from ADmin.... this is why I will never work under nurisng admin... they could care less about the people working under them. I would tell them to kiss my patootie and call out if they don't give it.. I am so over the stupid attitudes of nursing admin...
By the way, you seldom see this type of thing working in the OR or the ER as most of those areas don't fall under nursing admin....
you are making a mountain out of a molehill. I would not give them any paperwork and if they do not give you the requested day off, then just call in sick that day. It really is that simple.
That's a bad idea all around. That can most definitely be a reason to disciplined or even fired with cause, especially if you get a manager whose petty or looking to make an example.
If the schedule's already made and you need special dispensation, then they certainly can ask you to provide proof. The same holds true if the schedule is not made yet but (and this is a big deal in union workplaces) giving you the requested day will force a manager to have to decline another request that was submitted first by someone with more seniority.
You do not need to provide all of the details. Or, if you prefer, speak to HR directly and let them know the situation and tell them you are not interested in sharing the details with the floor staff/manager.
OP, please use this unfortunate circumstance to think about setting more firm boundaries between your employer and yourself.
If the schedule had not yet been posted for the time period in which your court hearing falls, all you had to do was use whatever mechanism exists at your facility to request the day off. Your manager's half-joking comment may have been a genuine attempt at humor, or may indicate staffing shortages where you work -- you know the answer to that better than we do here.
If the schedule was already set, or was subsequently posted with you still scheduled to work that day, your next step might have been to try to switch with someone by simply saying, "hey, I really can't work this day ... but I saw that you're working Thursday of that week and I could work that for you if you're able to switch?"
If that failed, you might attempt again to speak to your supervisor or manager personally, and ask to take a personal day or something on that day.
At no time was it necessary to say why you need that day off.
I think I'm just going to give them the summons letter. They will find out sooner or later because I will be having a name change. I guess I'm just a little emotional and possibly overreacting.
Yea, they don't need the whole thing...they just need the (usually) the front sheet with the date and time....It's no ones business what it is for...good luck
canesdukegirl, BSN, RN
1 Article; 2,543 Posts
Honey, give them ONLY the court dates and let them know that it is for a divorce. DO NOT HOPE that they keep it to themselves; make it clear to them that your expectation is that they will say nothing. Make it clear that this is a private matter and that you can't say more about it because your attorney has instructed you not to discuss it. They don't know that you don't have an atty. They don't have to know. What they MUST know, however, is that this is confidential. If you go into this proceeding without an atty, then you are representing yourself, and thus in effect means that you are your own atty. You are instructing YOURSELF not to discuss it. You have the law on your side here.