Do friends outside of nursing school give you a hard time?

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Basically the question above...I have friends who aren't in nursing school give me a hard time because I spend a lot of time studying (hello, its nursing school). They seem angry but when I explain to them, its a lot of work, they don't seem to understand and get offended when I don't hang out with them. This isn't like regular school, and I feel bad that I can't be with them, but come on! This is my career and my grades.

Does this happen to anyone else?

Specializes in ER/Ortho.

My best friend just started her first job as a new teacher so she is very busy too. We stay in touch every couple of weeks with an hour long phone call to catch up, but we are both fine with it.

My family is sometimes difficult to deal with. They don't understand that if I am studying it is basically like I am at school. They seem to think if I am not in class its free time. My dad is the worst and just doesn't get it at all.

I have tried dating while in the program, and it doesn't seem to work. You meet someone, go on a date, hit if off, and they want to go out during the week, every weekend, talk on the phone, or chat every night. Even if you explain your in school, and just don't have that kind of free time they don't understand.

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Specializes in EMERGENCY.

Wow - I guess I'm lucky! My friends have been nothing but supportive & encouraging. I'm older & so are they.. so maybe because they are also very busy - they understand the pressure & lack of "free time" that I have while in school. We try to get together & catch up when I'm on break :)

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Haha!!! I'm about to loose in-laws because they believe the mother belongs in the home - ONLY! I love being home with my son, just would like to work 1 or 2 days outside the home - to have something FOR ME... to serve & to make a little extra income!

Luckily my husband does NOT believe the way they do. He still wants me home as much as possible, but is totally supportive of me continuing on & learning as much as I can. Praise God for husbands who support, but still allow us to stay home the majority of the time!

haha, I hear you on this one... My husband says he'll never say no to me and he'll support whatever I decide (regarding school), but the mommy in-law is getting HIGHLY impatient (because she wants me to have kids like yesterday), so I don't have children yet, but am asked literally everyday, and what the hold up is... Its frustrating, thank god, we live 45 min away from the hubb bubb...!

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Specializes in Telemetry & Obs.

I remember once my cousin dropped by unexpectedly while I was studying for an exam and dared complain because I was being "rude" by not entertaining him....until I reminded him that HE was rude for dropping in uninvited without calling first to see if I was busy.

OP, you'll find you have some fair-weather friends and some TRUE friends. Cherish those true friends :)

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Specializes in Tele, Cardiac Post Op, ER.

Yeah its hard to swallow, but true friends stick behind. I understand friendship is a two-way street...but when they don't follow through and expect you to later, its kinda hard to keep the friendship. Thanks everyone for your responses! :heartbeat

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Specializes in Emergency/Cath Lab.

I guess I am lucky. I have lots of friends outside the NS population and everyone of them gives me a hard time, but I give it right back. They especially give me a hard time as a guy but I can take it and just laugh with them. It doesnt bother me one bit

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Yes, this happens all the time. The worst is when you are top of your class, and someone in something that does not require the time and education is giving you a hard time because "I got an A, and I was able to bake a lifesize gingerbread house for my kid's kindergarten, and I work full-time, and I volunteer at the homeless shelter! Why did you get a B?!" Really. Thanks, I'm an idiot, I'm sorry. Okay so the person didn't do those exact things...but honestly asked why I only got a B and couldn't do our volunteer thing anymore! AAAAAAAAAAACCCCCCCCCCKKKK!!!

It's even worse because I used to have a 4.0 - I've had to learn to accept that I have no time, no life, no money, and still only get a B.

Sorry, feeling a little ranty today.

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haha, I hear you on this one... My husband says he'll never say no to me and he'll support whatever I decide (regarding school), but the mommy in-law is getting HIGHLY impatient (because she wants me to have kids like yesterday), so I don't have children yet, but am asked literally everyday, and what the hold up is... Its frustrating, thank god, we live 45 min away from the hubb bubb...!

You poor woman! Good thing you have a supportive husband as I do! Our son was a surprise (all be it a good one), I worked full time before he was born until 2 weeks before he came... and have been home since. NOW - it is expected of me to stay home - and have no outside activities! I was a youth leader and sang in the choir in our church before we moved... and being gone for 2 hours 2 nights a week were too much!!!! They lived in our basement & wouldn't even babysit for that short time while I was at CHURCH!!!

Now, that I want to FINALLY pursue school - AGAIN - this is horrible! How dare I let someone else raise my son!!! Are you kidding me??? 9 hours a day for 11 months - with weekends & evenings off & breaks in between!!! And I only plan to work 1 or 2 12 hour shifts a week!

And get this... yesterday they call us & want us to come down there for the weekend. Want us to stay the night for several nights! (they are an hour & 20 min away). They NEVER come & see us! Why do we always have to go there & spend the gas... why do we have to stay the night??? We are a family of our own!!! They said they were 'willing' to babysit for a night and a day for us (which they NEVER volunteer for)... if we come down there. They live in a rual community with NOTHING to do and with hubby laid off right now we are being very frugle with our finances & can't 'afford' to go out & get a hotel or whatever. Why can't they come up here & get our son, let us have a night & the next day to ourselves & we'll go & get him the next day???

Sorry - don't mean to rant... just very frustrated!!! WE ARE ADULTS!

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Except for my two best friends, none of my other friends understand the amount of homework and studying I have to do. They all get angry and think that I hate them or want to stop hanging out with them, or get furious at me if I drop off the face of the earth for a few days just to study! Even when I explain myself it just goes over my head. It definately adds a bit more stress to the load :(

I TOTALLY agree. My two best friends are completely supportive. The rest of my friends... are gone. And I say, if they chose to bail instead of step back and be supportive of me improving my life, then they weren't real friends to begin with, and good riddance! I have tried and tried to explain to my friends what it is like. However, stay at home mothers with one child (or friends with no child or husband at all) do not understand the life of work, school, two children, and home life.

I wanted to smack one of my friends when she said, "Certainly there is something you can give up. I mean, you have too much on you." I was like, "Ok, and what do you presume I give up? Work? I wish, but we kinda need power and FOOD and gas and CLOTHES. Kids? Nope, I'm kinda the only mama they've got. And I kinda like the little rugrats! ;-) Home? My home gets neglected enough. Would you like to see the lovely mold specimen growing in my toilet? Isn't it lovely? School? ABSOLUTELY NOT. I have waited 10 years to go to school, and I do not want to be scrubbing toilets FOREVER!!!!" :banghead:

But they just cannot comprehend it because they are not going through it. So just let them go and move on. I am sure you will meet mroe understanding friends in nursing school. I know I have!

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Someone a couple pages back posted, "What friends?" That's kind of how I feel. I don't have many friends. However, the friends I DO have are the kind that, I can see them once every 2 or 3 years, and when we get back together it's like no time has passed. I'm actually seeing someone in a couple weeks who has been my best friend since I was 2 weeks old (she's 2 weeks younger than I am and our parents were friends), and this will be the first time since last May. Prior to yesterday on the phone, we hadn't TALKED since May! My classmates are the people I socialize with (with whom I socialize? Grammar police, help me out!) and my family is my basic support system. Other than that, I sit at home with my books, laptop, med cards, class notes, pocket guides...

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No and I wouldn't put up with any so called friends giving me a hard time either.

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The most negativity I have had was when I told a few people of my plans to go back to school for nursing. About 4-5 people said "Wow....nurses don't ever get time off" or "Nursing is A LOT of work." To the first comment, I beg to differ. One thing that attracts me to this field is the flexibility--you can do prn work, part-time, full-time, agency, etc....so many options. For the second comment, I was like "Uh-huh. And your point is?" I don't have a problem with my work ethic. Maybe these people did?! Who knows. I just know I keep my eye on the prize.

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