Discrimination Allegations

Updated:   Published

Nurse Reported To BON For Discrimination

I need an advice or just your thoughts. I work as inpatient mental health nurse. We had this tall, big , physically healthy and strong, highly aggressive patient on the unit. He sent one of our male nurses to ER and then on medical leave for several months.

Few weeks after this assault, he stopped taking his medications and became aggressive again. I called security to give a shot and they only sent us 2 people: one male and one female.

I requested another person but was told that they are short staffed. I said that we need at least one more male security to handle this violent patient safely.

This female security rolled her eyes and stated she has the same training. I didn't respond anything to that.  Likely, we were able to de-escalate the patient verbally, everything went OK.

The next day, I was told the female security filed a discrimination complaint to equity committee stating that she felt harassed and discriminated. She also made up a lie that I stated the following phrase TWICE :" You are a woman so you can't do your job as well as a man".

I have never said this phrase which was confirmed by my coworker. Later, the equity committee was trying to swipe it under the rug stating that they never asked her coworkers if they witnessed me stating this "key phrase".

I assume she tried to drop this phrase out of "discrimination case" because  she wasn't able to get her coworkers to testify the "discriminatory statement" she made up.

Long story short, I am on a second month of this "harassment investigation". I was already "educated" by DON and unit manager  that I have no right to request male security. I was already interviewed by equity committee ( which was very pervasive and accusatory) and I also recently mistakenly received an email  about "follow up discussion" on the investigation sent by my DON. She wasn't supposed to send it to me but she did accidentally then frantically attempted to unsend the email 5 times LOL. I also received an email from IT stating that DON requested to retract that email ASAP.

This makes me think that it is DON who is pushing this discrimination case. (I am not her favorite nurse LOL.) 

I am very distressed with all this.

How a simple request for adequate security can be turned into a discrimination case? 

All I asked is male security for aggressive male patient to protect everybody including the lady officer. How on earth could that be turned into a harassment case? 

In fact, I feel harassed by her.  She made up a lie about discriminatory statements and got me into 2 months long "discrimination investigation".

It is very humiliating and stressful. Please give me some advice on how to react and what to do. Can I take counter actions and report her to HR for falsifying facts? 

Specializes in Psychiatry, Community, Nurse Manager, hospice.

You just need to ask for more security. Not big security, male security, etc. 

She felt insecure and now you're feeling insecure. She tried to exaggerate what you said because of her feelings and now you're trying to exaggerate her exaggeration into a counter suit.

I recommend that you take a step back and correct your behavior because you did in fact make a mistake when you asked for a man. That is really all that is needed here and you won't have to be disciplined or sued if you just realize that you can't request a type of security guard and can only request more security guards.

You were out of line when you requested a male security, implying that she was somehow weaker because of her sex/gender. How do you know that an assumed-to-be cis male security would have denser bone mass, or be bigger, faster and stronger than the assumed-to-be cis female security? Do you think only cis men should work in security because they're automatically tougher or better at their jobs because of their sex assigned at birth? Forgive them for hiring someone who wasn't male-presenting to do a a job. 

Specializes in Geriatrics.

Honestly, I wouldn't have said anything. However, I empathize with your situation. Realistically all that can be done is a hand slap. Just move on with your life.

Sue her for defamation of character. You have two years to do it since the date of incident. It is ridiculous, but this is the culture we create and support. Enjoy the consequences

Specializes in Nurse Attorney.

The title of this post says reported to the BON but I don't see that in the description of what happened.

Specializes in BSN, RN, CVRN-BC.

I wonder what a lawyer would say about those the false statement in the accusation.

Insisting that the security officer must be a man?  "I'll never be your beast of burden.  My back is broad, but it's a hurtin." 

Us sis-males do have more testosterone with all of its benefits and disadvantages, but the female security guard might have worked her butt off and be just as strong.  Sometimes strength is in how you use your gifts.  You probably know next time to ask for more "security officers."

If you enjoy working there then endure.  If not then I don't know why you aren't looking to vote with your feet in this issue.  The DON dislikes you and that is going to have a major impact on your future earnings and promotion prospects.  

Good luck!

Oh man, what a tricky situation.  First, you have taught me a lesson.  I'm small framed and inpatient as well just not psych.  I send them over to ya LOL.  But I have said plenty of times when we try to refrain a patient from self harm or violent assualts that 'please we need somebody big, or please send a man!'  Well, thanks to this post, I'll never do that again. Goodness.  ?It's just so weird that this has become a thing and I'm sorry you have to go through with this. Second, what did the email say that she (DON) tried to erase????? ?..whew

To answer your question, was there ever a time where you could have talked to the security woman about how violent the patient was and that you were just trying to look out for her before it blew up into this big brouhaha?? Because this is all that was needed.  A simple one-on-one conversation for you guys to chat it up.  What a shame that we as society have gotten to a place where we can't even talk with one another.  

I'll tell ya, I didn't like that culture when it first started in the hospital about Midas and telling on people for silly things.  I mean egregious situation, yes, but we are getting so far from human interaction and kindness toward each other that no wonder we are falling into the state that we are finding ourselves in.

Irabee said:

According to equity committee I am not allowed to discriminate against any personal characteristics such as weight, height etc.... We are talking about security people!!

Yea, you can't do that. It doesn't matter though, like someone said above some of the smallest people can surprise you with strength.  But you're not alone, I too feel guilty surrounding the assumption that during a violent episode I feel like I would need and want a humongous person to help me..  Sometimes all that's needed is for them to arrive on site and then the person starts to act right...smh

FolksBtrippin said:

.

I recommend that you take a step back and correct your behavior because you did in fact make a mistake when you asked for a man. That is really all that is needed here and you won't have to be disciplined or sued if you just realize that you can't request a type of security guard and can only request more security guards.

And that's all it was, was a mistake.  I too have done this on more than one occasion for people withdrawing combative aggressive and hostile.  In the moment you are looking for the Incredible Hulk to come and rescue you.  You say things in hopes that they will send someone who can nip it right away with the least restrictive efforts. 

But, no more... At least I/we are all learning a lesson here

And I mean no offense to any WOMEN.  It's just I was thinking along the lines of protecting but this is such a slippery slope, I'm gonna stop right here... ha ha ha

HiddenAngels said:

Yea, you can't do that. It doesn't matter though, like someone said above some of the smallest people can surprise you with strength.  But you're not alone, I too feel guilty surrounding the assumption that during a violent episode I feel like I would need and want a humongous person to help me..  Sometimes all that's needed is for them to arrive on site and then the person starts to act right...smh

I can't rely on small people surprising me when a huge super aggressive patient goes on a rage... I need somebody who can guarantee 100% safety for all of us : patients, coworkers, seurity and me 

FolksBtrippin said:

You just need to ask for more security. Not big security, male security, etc. 

She felt insecure and now you're feeling insecure. She tried to exaggerate what you said because of her feelings and now you're trying to exaggerate her exaggeration into a counter suit.

I recommend that you take a step back and correct your behavior because you did in fact make a mistake when you asked for a man. That is really all that is needed here and you won't have to be disciplined or sued if you just realize that you can't request a type of security guard and can only request more security guards.

She didn't exaggerate, she lied. I am not trying to exaggerate anything either . She straight lied about me making discriminatory  statements and I want this to be clear for all parties involved. I am not adding or exaggerating anything . This " exaggeration" oh hers got me into 3 months of " investigation and hours of talking with DON ( being pulled off the floor for an hour each time). Should I have been les direct? Yes and I own it . But I am not going to take a blame for something that I never said. It was unfounded 

 

EdieBrous said:

The title of this post says reported to the BON but I don't see that in the description of what happened.

I didn't insert this image. I don't know why it was attached to my post

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