Define: Nurses Eating Their Young

[Daytonite, BSN, RN]

This is an older thread that still has significance in the nursing field today:

I see this posted all the time. I always thought it was someone who deliberately embarrasses or has a tantrum for the express purpose of making the other person feel small and/or stupid in front of others. Am I wrong in this thinking?

...And here are some updated articles about this topic:

Nurses Eating Their Young, A Different Perspective

Why Do Nurses Eat Their Young?

Nurses Eating Their Young Is Not Okay

[jenrninmi, MSN, RN]

I think it just means that some nurses treat the "new nurses" or nursing units poorly.

[codepinkRN]

[Have you ever heard of Horizontal Violence? It describes how nurses eat their young . I made a power point on this topic and was it ever interesting. The term originated in NewZealand with a group of midwives. You can do a search on horizontal violence and see how when feeling oppressed and powerless this behavior helps nurses feel in control. It is very damaging and leads to very poor morale. I think we have all experienced it

[mkeep74]

I see this posted all the time. I always thought it was someone who deliberately embarrasses or has a tantrum for the express purpose of making the other person feel small and/or stupid in front of others. Am I wrong in this thinking?

That's basically what it means. I, however, think it goes beyond this to include nursing instructors. They all went through school, and know how hard and demanding it can be, but most of them seem to take a secret thrill in watching us crumble. I say this as a recent graduate from LPN school. I plan to continue my education and hope to someday have my Masters so that I can teach, but the question is, will I be as sadistic as they were? I really don't know. My friends all laugh at me when I say that my thesis paper for getting my Masters will be of why nursing instructors are the way they are. I'm going to blow the whole thing wide open!!!!! They think I'm nuts. I might be a little. :rotfl: Anyway, in all fairness I have to say that my instructors were great, (even if a little sadistic at times), and that I learned alot from them. I think they are the way they are, and I'm including the ones who eat their young, because they need to make us tough. They need to make sure that we can stand up under the pressure and keep moving. Well, at least that's the reason for most of them. Their are some who are just plain mean. You'll get that anywhere you go, in any profession. Sorry for my soapbox, but yeah that's basically what it means. :chuckle

[sayitgirl]

I see this posted all the time. I always thought it was someone who deliberately embarrasses or has a tantrum for the express purpose of making the other person feel small and/or stupid in front of others. Am I wrong in this thinking?

Once you start working and experience this you will never forget it, believe me.

Nurses eating their young can be a new grad, or nurse new on a unit by employment or just working another unit for the day. Other nurse(s) are non-supportive by gossiping about the person, giving them the most difficult assignements,... if a mistake is made reporting them to the manager, not helping lift a patient..or answering a phone.....I think you get the picture. Being mean to another nurse basically, and it goes on all the time. I left my first job out of nursing school because of it. I could never get it resolved, because it also included the manager, it was best to just find another job. But these things do happened everywhere, I think it is a woman thing. It is also known as hostile work environment. Believe me at some point in your career unfortunately you will see it.

[bluesky, BSN, RN]

Once you start working and experience this you will never forget it, believe me.

Nurses eating their young can be a new grad, or nurse new on a unit by employment or just working another unit for the day. Other nurse(s) are non-supportive by gossiping about the person, giving them the most difficult assignements,... if a mistake is made reporting them to the manager, not helping lift a patient..or answering a phone.....I think you get the picture. Being mean to another nurse basically, and it goes on all the time. I left my first job out of nursing school because of it. I could never get it resolved, because it also included the manager, it was best to just find another job. But these things do happened everywhere, I think it is a woman thing. It is also known as hostile work environment. Believe me at some point in your career unfortunately you will see it.

Excellent post. :) I hope your next job was better!

[BandEmom]

I lost my first nursing job out of school. I worked in an LDRP unit in a small semi-rural hospital, and the preceptor I had was the big hero nurse of the unit (I'm sure you know what I mean, every unit has one), and although she was an excellent nurse, we were not a good personality match. Aside from that, there were days that there were nursing students on the unit that she'd precept too along with me. So then I'd get passed to whatever preceptor was on that day. Finally, when I did make a mistake, and advance a diet from clear to full on a C/S pt (on the preceptor's advice), the doc went nuts on me, and went to my boss and guess what - she did not defend me. I was being trained directly to labor as a new grad, and trying to learn pp and nursery. Other people there could see that I was struggling, but I just didn't fit in with these people who have all worked together for 15 years - I was only the third new hire in the last 5 years!!!!

I wanted to quit nursing altogether, but now I work med surg, which I dont like, but the staff are wonderful and have so much faith in me and i don't think horizontal violence has to be the norm. I think it takes good leadership to prevent it.

[ilostu12]

Yes it happens all too often. It almost ended my career before it began. I was doing my perceptorship with a nurse that had over 30yrs of experience. I made mistakes, just like EVERYONE does, but I caught them right away and corrected them. My perceptor just said "Don't worry, your new and your learning....," but when she went on break she was telling all the other staff how stupid I was and how carless I was (I'm sorry but not being able to clearly read some of the treatments that are hand written, then asking for clairification is not carless). I know she was saying these things cause I was in the supply closet to restock the med cart, and heard her talking to the STNA's. Needless to say I was devistated, I spoke to the DON and left. My instructor called me at home that night and told me to return in the morning and that she would be there ( I guess the DON called her). The next morning I showed up and The DON meet me at the door and asked my to come to her office. The DON, my instructor, and myself went over what had happened. The nurse I was percepting with was immediatly fired and the DON wrote a letter of reprermand and forwarded a copy to the Board of Nursing. However the damage was done I was going to drop from school, with only 3 days til graduation. But my instructor and the DON kept at me and convinced me to finish school and not to give upand get my LPN.

Now I work at a place where we all work together, the DON has a VERY strick rule about backstabbing and horizontal violence. If one of us gets overwhelmed, a fall, then an admission, and the phone, etc. It's not uncommon for the DON to come out of her office and jump right in to help with whatever needs to be done.

I'm back in school, going for my RN and look forward to a long career where I'm at

sorry for the long post

[mydesygn]

Yes it happens all too often. It almost ended my career before it began. I was doing my perceptorship with a nurse that had over 30yrs of experience. I made mistakes, just like EVERYONE does, but I caught them right away and corrected them. My perceptor just said "Don't worry, your new and your learning....," but when she went on break she was telling all the other staff how stupid I was and how carless I was (I'm sorry but not being able to clearly read some of the treatments that are hand written, then asking for clairification is not carless). I know she was saying these things cause I was in the supply closet to restock the med cart, and heard her talking to the STNA's. Needless to say I was devistated, I spoke to the DON and left. My instructor called me at home that night and told me to return in the morning and that she would be there ( I guess the DON called her). The next morning I showed up and The DON meet me at the door and asked my to come to her office. The DON, my instructor, and myself went over what had happened. The nurse I was percepting with was immediatly fired and the DON wrote a letter of reprermand and forwarded a copy to the Board of Nursing. However the damage was done I was going to drop from school, with only 3 days til graduation. But my instructor and the DON kept at me and convinced me to finish school and not to give upand get my LPN.

Now I work at a place where we all work together, the DON has a VERY strick rule about backstabbing and horizontal violence. If one of us gets overwhelmed, a fall, then an admission, and the phone, etc. It's not uncommon for the DON to come out of her office and jump right in to help with whatever needs to be done.

I'm back in school, going for my RN and look forward to a long career where I'm at

sorry for the long post

Wow, I am so impressed by the support of the DON and the instructor. All to often that kind of behaivior continues because management enables it by not allowing the accuser to be confronted. Unfortunately, I was a new employee on a nursing unit and faced similiar behaivior. I was not a new grad (14 years as a nurse) but the constant running to the manager with trivial comments such as I wasn't friendly or I wasn't helpful was so demoralizing. I had never faced anything like that in any of my prior jobs. I had excellent evaluations, had been nominated for nursing excellence and promoted to positions of leadership so none of the comments were even remotely true. Sadly, I left this position after 6 months not because of the poor treatment by the staff as much as the lack of leadership displayed by the manager. By pulling me in the office behind every idle comment without making any attempt to objectively determine if there was any merit simply justified and enabled the behaivior to continue. It usually isn't the whole staff but a very vocal 3 or 4 who hide behind emails and discussions with the manager. You can spot them instantly because they will never directly discuss an error or problem with the indiviual involved and they are enabled because the manager supports the comments and the manner in which they are made.

I have since become a manager elsewhere and am determined not to allow any new employee to experience that. I have to say that perhaps that was the reason I went through that experience was to make me understand how important it is not to allow that behaivior to continue and fester, literally it destroys any teamwork on a unit.

[DusktilDawn]

Wow, I am so impressed by the support of the DON and the instructor. All to often that kind of behaivior continues because management enables it by not allowing the accuser to be confronted. Unfortunately, I was a new employee on a nursing unit and faced similiar behaivior. I was not a new grad (14 years as a nurse) but the constant running to the manager with trivial comments such as I wasn't friendly or I wasn't helpful was so demoralizing. I had never faced anything like that in any of my prior jobs. I had excellent evaluations, had been nominated for nursing excellence and promoted to positions of leadership so none of the comments were even remotely true. Sadly, I left this position after 6 months not because of the poor treatment by the staff as much as the lack of leadership displayed by the manager. By pulling me in the office behind every idle comment without making any attempt to objectively determine if there was any merit simply justified and enabled the behaivior to continue. It usually isn't the whole staff but a very vocal 3 or 4 who hide behind emails and discussions with the manager. You can spot them instantly because they will never directly discuss an error or problem with the indiviual involved and they are enabled because the manager supports the comments and the manner in which they are made.

I have since become a manager elsewhere and am determined not to allow any new employee to experience that. I have to say that perhaps that was the reason I went through that experience was to make me understand how important it is not to allow that behaivior to continue and fester, literally it destroys any teamwork on a unit.

I was also impressed by the actions of the DON and nursing instructor in this situation.

You are also correct when you point out that this type of problem is allowed to continue when management does not handle these situaitons appropriately.

You're my kind of manager mydesyngn.

[sayitgirl]

Excellent post. :) I hope your next job was better!

The next job I took was excellant! It was not a perfect job, every one has its ups and downs but the people were nice. They worked as a team for the most part. The only reason I left was that I just did not want to do physical nursing, I am a psych nurse at heart.

[RosesrReder, BSN, MSN, RN]

I am not a nurse but the same thing happens in any job. The person training you might think you are a bother and "eat you" :rotfl:

Also, at school......remember when you were a freshman :)