Confessions of a 30-Something RN Grad

I am in the seat, feeling comfortable, calm (even though I have went through enough security to enter Fort Knox). I read through the instructions as to not miss anything. "You have 6 hours...." Sounds good, all is well..... Nurses Announcements Archive Article

First question, okay, 50/50.....A or C..... hmmm...A.... "next".....2nd question.....what? What are they asking? These are all right, and there are no indicators in the question showing priority. Can I ask them "is this patient stable?" "how old are they?" "should I assume they are anxious?"....Can I phone a friend?

Okay, quit assuming, take the question at face value......uh......well, if I were getting this done, this is what I would want to know.......B........

Right about question 8 I hear the girl next to me groan. Then about 10 questions later she does a big sigh, then a few later she says, "Oh gosh." Seriously? Shut-up.....I am freaking out, too. The least you can do is give me some silence, right? Maybe I should've said yes to those earplugs.

Where's the delegation? Where is the alternate question with apical pulse location? Where are the labs? Where is the question on crutches?

Why do I get the feeling they are asking me about the same thing over and over? Maybe they are thinking (I have now humanized the NCLEX monster as "they") if I give her the question 5 or 6 more times, maybe she'll get it right.....then.......

Black screen.....wait! They are thinking....we gave her every shot possible, but she blew it. 75 questions, and I knew the answer to a whopping.....TWO (with certainty).

I do the outgoing survey, looking for the question that says, do you think this test was made as an evil joke? "Strongly agree"

I again get fingerprinted (I am thinking, if you think I actually paid this pathetic looking, short-haired blonde girl in sweatpants to take the test for me, then she did a poor job.....I am demanding a refund). I courteously smile and get my stuff. Then I realize, it's time to hit the potty. My stomach is gurgling, and I can actually see my heartbeat in my abdomen. It is pounding. I get into my car, deciding who won't think I am crazy if I call in this state of mind. Okay, my hubby, of course, he always makes me feel better. "Oh, that stinks." Is his response to my description. "When can you take it again?" I'm thinking "I DON'T KNOW, I DIDN'T PLAN ON FAILING!" You're not helping, click......then, my mom. Mom's always make you feel better, right? "Oh sweetie, it's not the end of the world, you can just take it over." Again, not what I wanted to hear.

At this point I am hoping that Ashton pops out from behind the car next to me with his trendy hair and crooked smile and says, "You've been Punk'd!" so that I can slap him in the face or kick him where the sun don't shine or something equally degrading.

Where are all of my girlfriends who are RNs? Voicemail, Voicemail, Voicemail.

I am sitting in a random parking lot thinking, "Maybe I'll just tell everyone that I had to reschedule, then take the exam again before anybody finds out that I've failed." How vain is that?!

Ugh!!! My stomach is hurting again. I get a few calls/texts and I can't bear to tell the whole ugly story again.

I get home (I can't even remember driving really....it feels like I got home in 5 minutes). I sit on my couch for about 45 minutes.....no TV, no kids, no talking, maybe even no blinking. I didn't take the NCLEX serious enough. I should've done a different review. I should've done more questions. I should've taken it later or maybe earlier or maybe I should've just NOT studied.

Of course, nothing on BRN the next day, the day after that, I wake up at 0500 and check...nope...I am even looking on allnurses.com to see what the odds are of failing at 75 questions. Meanwhile, I am talking to people now. I am trying to convince myself that I am okay with whatever happens (of course, I am MORE okay with passing!). I contemplate setting my alarm for 0200 Saturday morning (I've heard the BRN updates their website at 0200 for the previous day). I decide that if it isn't there, it will ruin the rest of my night's sleep, so I pass on the alarm idea.

Saturday morning, I sleep in, 0900.......I click on my bookmark (yes, I have bookmarked it).....type my last name.......can you believe it? There is another woman in my county with the same name....well, that is annoying, even SHE passed the NCLEX....wait....oh, okay, I think I can actually hear the word relief as I exhale. Now, I can drop the weight on my chest and the pit from my stomach. Phew.

Moral of the story, sometimes the signs and symptoms (abdominal pain, bounding pulse, anxiety, feelings of impending doom) don't match the diagnosis (Effective testing output r/t using my noggin aeb name showing up on BRN site)

What's next?

You mean, now I have to find a job? My stomach hurts again.

Congrats! Hey, have you ever thought about being a writer?

I'll be starting the nursing program august 2010!! I can't imagine how I will feel BEFORE,DURING, and AFTER the exam! I'm already a nervous person so I will be on edge! This was such a great story!! CONGRATS too!! :)

Specializes in Obstetrics, M/S, Family medicine.

I had hoped that "pre-NCLEXers" would find their way to this article. I wrote it for my classmates, bc I wanted them to know how horrible i felt, so that they could see it is normal. I was the 2nd one to take it after graduation, I had very good grades, did well in clinicals, and I really, really felt horrible (and vulnerable) after the test. So, my hope was to show them that passing and feeling horrible very possibly go hand in hand.

And as far as thinking about writing, yes, I have. I have casually written my whole life, and I have found my niche with short stories. I have learned that I have ADD tendencies, which makes it difficult for me to come up with endings. My best stories are those written in about 30 minutes start to finish.

I don't know if any of you know Rick Reilly, but he writes for Sports Illustrated. He is the one who writes on the last page of each magazine. I have hopes to write something exactly like that for a nursing journal/magazine.

This, of course, would only supplement my first love....nursing.

Thanks for reading, and I love to hear how so many people can relate!

Oh man these great stories has me so encouraged! I am 36 years old, done with all my pre-requistes and is trying my hardest to get accepted at into a nursing program. After reading these posts I feel so rejuvinated to continue trying. All of your stories has inspired me and has given me faith that, I too one day will write about my experience in taking the NCLEX exam.

Thank you so much for your truly inspiring and humprous stories. Look for mine in the near future(God willing)

mine is a similar story, except I know that the NCLEX has 265 questions!!! I had to answer them all...at question 175, I knew I was getting them all. Quite frankly after about 200, I think I was just picking something. I had taken the LPN boards the year before, so I was not necessarily nervous. The LPN NCLEX turned off at 75 and I passed. After the RN NCLEX I got ice cream and had to drive 2 hours home. The next 3 days were hell for me and everyone around me, LOL. do I cry now or later, I did not know if I would be able to take the boards again anytime soon, I was moving to Germany to be with my spouse in one month. when I saw my name as a licensed RN for my state, I cried, my family tought it was bad news they were going to hear. it was the best feeling knowing all that studing paid off!

As it turns out, I will not have to beg my manager to keep me on as a LPN because I PASSED the NCLEX. All the struggle, anxiety and beating myself up was not really worth it. I am so thankful that you posted your story because it is the normal feeling after the NCLEX to feel like you did not make it. I ave heard that from so many people. I love my job and working the last month as a GN has cemented even further why I went to school and made a mid-life career change. In some ways I feel like those of us with "life experience" are better prepared in an acute care setting. It is certainly easier to avoid getting caught up in the drama that so often happens. Thanks for your words of wisdom and encouragement from another "30 something" who can relate to NCLEX hell.

Specializes in allergy and asthma, urgent care.

I could have written this article, althought not as well as you did!! I was a forty something RN grad taking the NCLEX last summer, and I came out convinced that my exam stopped at 75 cause it only took them that long to figure out how stupid I was!!! I paid the extra $$ to look up my results on line, and they somehow got lost. 8 days and millions of calls later, I found out that I had passed!! Now I sit waiting to take my FNP certification next week, and those old scary NCLEX feelings keep coming back!!

Thanks for expressing how everyone I know felt after taking the exam!

Specializes in Med-Surg, & ED.
I could have written this article, althought not as well as you did!! I was a forty something RN grad taking the NCLEX last summer, and I came out convinced that my exam stopped at 75 cause it only took them that long to figure out how stupid I was!!! I paid the extra $$ to look up my results on line, and they somehow got lost. 8 days and millions of calls later, I found out that I had passed!! Now I sit waiting to take my FNP certification next week, and those old scary NCLEX feelings keep coming back!!

Thanks for expressing how everyone I know felt after taking the exam!

I'm assuming this FNP is forensic nursing? If I'm correct, could you tell me what you did to earn this? I am very interested and plan on taking courses online. Did you do this online or in class? what school did you attend...I'll look up the specifics.

Too many questions! I just can't wait :D I take NCLEX this Sunday July the 5th. I wanted to give myself a special birthday since I have worked so hard in earning my degree! It'll be my 35th birthday!!!!!!!!!!! :D I hope to pass the NCLEX and ready for hands on training! Anxiety comes and goes...moody at times...since yesterday. I ask all of you to pray for me and anyone else doing this...please.

Specializes in allergy and asthma, urgent care.

No, it means Family Nurse Practitioner. However.....the school I went to (Boston College) has a forensic nurse practitioner program, also. You should check out their website for details.....http://www.bc.edu

Specializes in Med-Surg, & ED.
No, it means Family Nurse Practitioner. However.....the school I went to (Boston College) has a forensic nurse practitioner program, also. You should check out their website for details.....www.bc.edu

Thankyou ! Good luck next week! :D Will you make it!

What can I say except thank you to everyone who shared their stories - glories and horrors and all :)

@gipsonbee, Amen! This inspires me.

"My Father is a King. I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me."

This anxiety-ridden monster, this "sort-of" hellish experience - also our claim to our calling.

Specializes in Quality Improvement / Informatics.

I took the NCLEX this afternoon, it shut off at 75 questions, perhaps 10 of which I was sure of, and said "Thanks for playing!" Since I don't drink, I went to the bookstore and bought the biggest chocolate chip cookie I could find and sat and read comic books for two hours. Someone in our program figured out an unofficial way to determine if you pass within an hour of taking the test. Basically, you log onto the Pearson Vue website and try to re-register for the test. If it says "there is another test scheduled" or something like thaty, you've passed. According to this hacker method, I passed.

I am no longer tachy, but will not be completely relaxed until my name appears on the BRN website. Regardless, I'm calling myself nurse Rob!