Co Worker and snide comments

Nurses Relations

Published

So this is like a vent/help I've got here. So I have a co worker that I feel has crossed the line with her remarks and I'm not entirely sure how to handle it. She was only hired about a month ago and it seems as if she took an immediate disliking to me, and in all honesty due to the nature of her comments I believe her disliking comes from the fact that I'm male.

Within her first week on the job she point blank asked me, in front of other co workers some of whom are very good friends of mine, if I hit women. This was after she had walked in on me and a female coworker who's also a good friend horsing around during a break. I answered the question and my friend took up for my defense, however she refused to drop the issue for weeks. I have never hit a women in my life and didn't like being accused of such especially by someone I barely know.

That was the first comment but today I feel as if she really crossed the line. My best friend and his family were in town visiting this weekend and stopped by the hospital on their way out to say goodbye. My best friend has three beautiful children, two girls and a boy to which I'm the God father. Well apparently this woman saw me with them and used it as another way to attack me. When I came back in she passed a comment in front of several coworkers and my supervisor that I 'seemed a bit too close with that little girl' which must have been a reference to me carrying my oldest God daughter outside.

Now that comment really set me off because I'd die for those kids, I love them dearly and I also have my own child on the way so for anyone to imply I'd hurt a child really upsets me. Another thing is her making a comment like this in front of co workers and my supervisor could very well hurt me professionally. I work in ER now but have worked in Peds ER and I'm currently in school to get my NP in Pediatrics.

Maybe I'm over reacting by being so upset but it seems as if she's trying to professionally sabotage me. Now I've dealt with hostile co workers but never like this woman, has anyone else every dealt with a hostile co worker of this nature? How do you handle it while maintaining a civil working environment?

Specializes in ER, Peds ER.

Thank you. You've all really helped make this situation bearable over the last couple of days.

To answer the question posed. My girlfriend is 11 weeks today so we don't know what we're having yet. We got our names picked out though, so we're not even sure we're going to find out when we can. We might let it be a surprise.

Specializes in Med-Surg, Psych.

When she returns to work, she is likely to either escalate, find another target, or stop her inappropriate behavior (highly unlikely). Make sure you keep your guard up as long as she works there. Do not be alone with her, or have any interaction with her or say anything to her that is not work-related. Do not respond to anything she says in the future that is inappropriate except informing her that you will be letting NM/HR know about her comments, and document her comments and any witnesses for NM/HR. You should check with a lawyer about her presenting a hostile work environment and whether you could pursue legal action if the company drops the ball on this one. If you cannot claim harassment due to age, race, etc. then a hostile work environment claim may not provide any protection.

This coworker wants to build a case either against you, or for you so u better start building yours like a progress note, with date,time, and situation before it gets out hand. She got the nerve !!!!!!!!!! GOOD LUCK.

Specializes in Onc/Hem, School/Community.
Jay, you know we are all really nosy here so give us an update. Pretty please. I'm glad you had the meeting. Sometimes you have to let it all out and I think you did a great job.

:smiley_ab Well said. I am glad the OP is not letting this weasel get away with this stuff.

Specializes in ER, Peds ER.

I would just like everyone to know it's a very nice feeling to go to work and know I don't have to deal with this woman on my shift anymore. I don't know (nor do I care) if she's back from suspension but there hasn't been anything carrying over from other shifts so for right now I'm safe and it's comforting.

Jaybird

Glad to hear that thing's are looking up for you. Hopefully this person will stay beyond your reach. Good thing that you spoke up for yourself and that they listened to you. Now you can concentrate on your job.:wink2:

Specializes in Operating Room Nursing.

I just hope that she's not targeting other men on the shift she's been put on. :uhoh21:

Specializes in Pedatrics, Child Protection.

Wow.

Congrats on taking the high (professional) road on this one. I'm so happy to see that things are working out for you.

As others have said, keep us posted.:up:

Specializes in ER, Peds ER.

I took PTO this week due to the end of the semester but since everyone here was so very helpful with this situation while I was going through it, I figured I had to let you all know that I just got a phone call from a coworker, and she was more than pleased to inform me that Nurse Nasty was fired on the spot this evening for reasons that are being kept hush hush at the moment. I'm sure it won't stay that way and the reasoning behind her firing will be revealed. But can I say that it is an extremely relieve not to have to worry about this woman at all anymore!

On a side note my pregnant girlfriend will hopefully become my pregnant fiancee this weekend, sshhh don't tell her that.

Again thank you all so much for being understand ears during all that mess.

Specializes in Family Practice/Primary Care.

Good to hear she got canned.

Might I ask what area exactly you are in? If you are near me I want to be prepared for any new arrivals.

Specializes in ER, Peds ER.

I'm in the Lexington Kentucky area, so if you're in TN you should be safe... should be.. lol.

Specializes in Family Practice/Primary Care.

Heh, hopefully.

If we start orienting a new nurse from Kentucky I am PMing you.

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